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As a member of the #MeToo movement, I fear where it may be heading at times

As I've mentioned previously, I, unfortunately, am one of the millions who have been sexually abused, assaulted, or harassed (all three in my case). Understandably so, I'm a proud member and supporter of the #MeToo movement. I want victims to feel they have voice, have power, and aren't silenced via fear of their perpetrators. I only wish I felt such securities when I was abused close to 30 years ago. In any case, I couldn't be happier that this movement is progressing as it is, and hopefully, in the long run, it does a world of good to help greatly condense the number of sexual improprieties we experience and observe.

Having said all that, though, I think we need to be careful to not unintentionally diminish the significance of traumatic, life-altering experiences such as rape, sexual abuse, and the like, by lending as much airtime to people referring to one another as a pet name; providing them with a gift which may be deemed as inappropriate; or even attempt to provide comfort, such as giving another a hug.

Discomfort, vulnerability, and broken trust are never good feelings to have. However, a lot of times the best way to remove such negative sensations is by communicating with the person who, intentionally or not, prompted them. If no sexual crime occurred (either legally or professionally), what good does it really do to try and destroy the person-in-question's life by posting the incident on social media? Why not talk to the person, try and understand one another, and help each other improve as individuals and as a team (so to speak) in the future?

I think some actions, whether they be physical or verbal, are almost universally deemed as inappropriate and wrong. Grabbing another by a private region; rape; touching a child; treating a person as a sexual object; making lewd sexual comments towards another; etc. are all examples of such actions. When such actions are taken, the proper authorities should be confronted with said information and take the appropriate actions as a result. When it comes to the more grey-area situations, however, I think it may do more harm than good to lump those purely uncomfortable predicaments in with more criminal matters. I know people who have been accused of sexual harassment by hugging another who was in distress, crying, and seemingly asking for a shoulder to cry on. How is that sexual harassment? The harasser in question was simply trying to be kind, be a friend, had no ill intent, and they got punished for it. If the hug made the accuser feel uncomfortable, confront the person about it, tell him or her how it made you feel, and I can all but guarantee it won't happen again. But please, let's not equate an unconsented hug with unconsented sex. This isn't even an apples and oranges comparison. It's an apples and bucket of Kentucky Friend Chicken comparison. Everyone's thoughts and feelings matter and no one should be made to feel uncomfortable, but no one's life should be destroyed over a hug. If we equate the two scenarios, it will unintentionally aim to discredit the #MeToo movement in the future, detract the significance and impact of people whom were actually harmed in sex crimes, and unnecessarily destroy lives in the process. #MeToo is giving voice to those whom have been the victim of sexual improprieties and we don't want to unintentionally transform it from that to a movement which stands for individuals who were wronged by it. This shouldn't be about revenge of the past; it should be about progressing in the present and future.

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