As I'm known to do, I've had some fun with trending hashtags on Twitter over the past couple of weeks. Here are my posts, ordered from the most to the least popular (all my tweets can be seen at this link - https://twitter.com/CraigRozniecki):
1) Obama reads from a teleprompter
GOP: "He doesn't have any thoughts of his own! What a loser!"
Trump reads from a teleprompter
GOP: "What a genius! Such a patriot! He makes us proud to be Americans!"
#TelePrompTer #Snark
380 Likes, 87 Retweets
2) Dear #GymJordan:
Calling into question a witness's credibility is probably not something you ought to wrestle with. Just sayin'.
#TrumpsWorseThanNixon
333 Likes, 107 Retweets
3) Every day is a Straight Pride Parade, as regardless of intent, heterosexuals parade privilege across the country/world, not understanding that members of the LGBT community have continually fought and sacrificed for what they take for granted.
#StraightPrideParade
365 Likes, 73 Retweets
4) Mueller: "Barr lied. The only reason I couldn't indict a sitting criminal, or president, is because of that stupid memo. If it weren't for that, Trump would be indicted. Exclamation point. I did my job. Congress, for the first time in your life, do yours!"
#MuellerSpeaks #Snark
307 Likes, 108 Retweets
5) Trump: "'Impeach' is a dirty, filthy, disgusting word. Anyway, where was I? So yeah, when you're famous, they'll let you do anything. Grab 'em by the pus*y, anything."
#TrumpResignNow #Snark
276 Likes, 97 Retweets
6) All in all I'm just another prick for a wall.
#MusicForRepublicans
284 Likes, 59 Retweets
7) Because I think men should make all the decisions for women; janitors should make all the decisions for lawyers; and elephants should make all the decisions for donkeys.
#WhyImConservative #Snark
179 Likes, 41 Retweets
8) Because even though I've never fully read the Bible, I swear I live by it - that and whatever they tell me on Fox News.
#WhyImConservative #Snark
190 Likes, 22 Retweets
9) 'Cause we're sicker
We're sinners
We're losers
And we're fake Christians
Tellin' our lies just for fun
We're cheaters
We're beaters
We're mid-night tweeters
We only love individual 1
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
#MusicForRepublicans
165 Likes, 41 Retweets
10) You down with GOP?
What, you crazy?
You down with GOP?
What, you crazy?
You down with GOP?
What, you crazy?
Who's down with GOP?
Just Russia, baby!
#MusicForRepublicans
154 Likes, 35 Retweets
11) Mueller: "There was obstruction, but nothing I can do about it. Congress, get to it! Due to key people lying/being uncooperative, there wasn't sufficient enough evidence to prove conspiracy, but it probably happened."
Trump: "No obstruction! No collusion!"
#MuellerSpeaks #Snark
137 Likes, 47 Retweets
12) Dirty deeds and they're done covfefe.
#MusicForRepublicans
139 Likes, 25 Retweets
13) Trump: "There was no obstruction, no collision, no nothing."
Translation: For the first time, courtesy of a double-negative, Donald Trump admits he committed a crime.
#TrumpResignNOW
111 Likes, 49 Retweets
14) Trumpanzees: "The Mueller Report is totally biased against Trump, but it exonerated him. Trump doesn't want the redacted portions released to the public, but they prove his innocence."
Yeah, that makes sense...
#JohnSolomon
98 Likes, 42 Retweets
15) Because I believe gun violence has nothing to do with guns; snowstorms have nothing to do with snow; and eating bagels has nothing to do with bagels.
#WhyImConservative #Snark
113 Likes, 16 Retweets
16) That's not how it works. There's a reason why the verdict dichotomy is "not guilty" & "guilty," as opposed to "innocent" & "guilty," b/c the onus is on the prosecution to prove guilt beyond a reasonable doubt. Not meeting such a standard does not prove innocence.
#MuellerSpeaks
97 Likes, 31 Retweets
17) "I'm f*cked." - #NervousDonald
87 Likes, 21 Retweets
18) Matt Gaetz calls John Dean a "ghost from Christmas past" just as he starts seeing ghosts courtesy of one too many shots he had at a bar during lunch-break.
#TrumpsWorseThanNixon
79 Likes, 21 Retweets
19) They're making a list
Tweeting it twice
Gonna screw you over whether you're naughty or nice
The GOP is comin' to town
The GOP is comin' to town
The GOP is comin' to town.
#MusicForRepublicans
72 Likes, 15 Retweets
20) Because I firmly believe in less government! Unless it deals with a person's genitalia. In that case, I think the government should get on up in there, bigly!
#WhyImConservative #Snark
76 Likes, 9 Retweets
21) Deny. Deflect. Distort. Project.
#NervousDonald
60 Likes, 16 Retweets
22) Bow wow wow, yippy yo, yippy yay,
Trump impeached by the muthaf*ckin' House
#MusicForRepublicans
59 Likes, 12 Retweets
23) Because I know if I give the top 1% all of the food, no one will starve. It'll all just trickle down.
#WhyImConservative #Snark
62 Likes, 8 Retweets
24) Because I'm strongly pro-life! ...until birth...
#WhyImConservative #Snark
56 Likes, 10 Retweets
25) Obama reads from a teleprompter
GOP: "He's such an idiot!"
Trump tries spelling "teleprompter"
Trump: "t-e-l-l-a-, you know, frumpter."
GOP: "Brilliant! He's like Mensa smart!"
#TelePrompTer #Snark
52 Likes, 11 Retweets
26) We cage the little children
Most the children of the world
Red and yellow, black and brown
They aren't welcome in our town
We cage the little children of the world.
#MusicForRepublicans
41 Likes, 15 Retweets
27) In light of these investigations, I think I'm going to write a memo, type in it the words "NO PERSON IS ABOVE THE LAW" in large font, inaccurately refer to it as part of the U.S. Constitution, and tell Mueller to reopen the case.
#MuellerSpeaks
35 Likes, 13 Retweets
27) Happy Birthday, Mr. President Putin. Happy Birthday to you.
#MusicForRepublicans
40 Likes, 8 Retweets
27) If a protester threw a shoe at Trump...
Trump: "Well, that was thoughtful. I needed a pair of sneakers. Wait, where's the other one?"
#TrumpProtest #Snark
40 Likes, 8 Retweets
30) It does matter if you're black or white. Hee-hee.
#MusicForRepublicans
34 Likes, 9 Retweets
31) We're learning to lie
But we ain't got memories
Tellin' the truth
Is the hardest thing.
#MusicForRepublicans
30 Likes, 6 Retweets
32) Sign: "F*ck you, Trump!"
Trump: "That's British for 'fake news,' I think, so yeah, that was nice."
#TrumpProtest #Snark
12 Likes, 0 Retweets
33) Because I think stupid facts are like your opinion, man.
#WhyImConservative #Snark
10 Likes, 1 Retweet
Totals: 4,168 Likes, 1,072 Retweets (Averages of 126.3 Likes, 32.5 Retweets)
1) Obama reads from a teleprompter
GOP: "He doesn't have any thoughts of his own! What a loser!"
Trump reads from a teleprompter
GOP: "What a genius! Such a patriot! He makes us proud to be Americans!"
#TelePrompTer #Snark
380 Likes, 87 Retweets
2) Dear #GymJordan:
Calling into question a witness's credibility is probably not something you ought to wrestle with. Just sayin'.
#TrumpsWorseThanNixon
333 Likes, 107 Retweets
3) Every day is a Straight Pride Parade, as regardless of intent, heterosexuals parade privilege across the country/world, not understanding that members of the LGBT community have continually fought and sacrificed for what they take for granted.
#StraightPrideParade
365 Likes, 73 Retweets
4) Mueller: "Barr lied. The only reason I couldn't indict a sitting criminal, or president, is because of that stupid memo. If it weren't for that, Trump would be indicted. Exclamation point. I did my job. Congress, for the first time in your life, do yours!"
#MuellerSpeaks #Snark
307 Likes, 108 Retweets
5) Trump: "'Impeach' is a dirty, filthy, disgusting word. Anyway, where was I? So yeah, when you're famous, they'll let you do anything. Grab 'em by the pus*y, anything."
#TrumpResignNow #Snark
276 Likes, 97 Retweets
6) All in all I'm just another prick for a wall.
#MusicForRepublicans
284 Likes, 59 Retweets
7) Because I think men should make all the decisions for women; janitors should make all the decisions for lawyers; and elephants should make all the decisions for donkeys.
#WhyImConservative #Snark
179 Likes, 41 Retweets
8) Because even though I've never fully read the Bible, I swear I live by it - that and whatever they tell me on Fox News.
#WhyImConservative #Snark
190 Likes, 22 Retweets
9) 'Cause we're sicker
We're sinners
We're losers
And we're fake Christians
Tellin' our lies just for fun
We're cheaters
We're beaters
We're mid-night tweeters
We only love individual 1
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
#MusicForRepublicans
165 Likes, 41 Retweets
10) You down with GOP?
What, you crazy?
You down with GOP?
What, you crazy?
You down with GOP?
What, you crazy?
Who's down with GOP?
Just Russia, baby!
#MusicForRepublicans
154 Likes, 35 Retweets
11) Mueller: "There was obstruction, but nothing I can do about it. Congress, get to it! Due to key people lying/being uncooperative, there wasn't sufficient enough evidence to prove conspiracy, but it probably happened."
Trump: "No obstruction! No collusion!"
#MuellerSpeaks #Snark
137 Likes, 47 Retweets
12) Dirty deeds and they're done covfefe.
#MusicForRepublicans
139 Likes, 25 Retweets
13) Trump: "There was no obstruction, no collision, no nothing."
Translation: For the first time, courtesy of a double-negative, Donald Trump admits he committed a crime.
#TrumpResignNOW
111 Likes, 49 Retweets
14) Trumpanzees: "The Mueller Report is totally biased against Trump, but it exonerated him. Trump doesn't want the redacted portions released to the public, but they prove his innocence."
Yeah, that makes sense...
#JohnSolomon
98 Likes, 42 Retweets
15) Because I believe gun violence has nothing to do with guns; snowstorms have nothing to do with snow; and eating bagels has nothing to do with bagels.
#WhyImConservative #Snark
113 Likes, 16 Retweets
16) That's not how it works. There's a reason why the verdict dichotomy is "not guilty" & "guilty," as opposed to "innocent" & "guilty," b/c the onus is on the prosecution to prove guilt beyond a reasonable doubt. Not meeting such a standard does not prove innocence.
#MuellerSpeaks
97 Likes, 31 Retweets
17) "I'm f*cked." - #NervousDonald
87 Likes, 21 Retweets
18) Matt Gaetz calls John Dean a "ghost from Christmas past" just as he starts seeing ghosts courtesy of one too many shots he had at a bar during lunch-break.
#TrumpsWorseThanNixon
79 Likes, 21 Retweets
19) They're making a list
Tweeting it twice
Gonna screw you over whether you're naughty or nice
The GOP is comin' to town
The GOP is comin' to town
The GOP is comin' to town.
#MusicForRepublicans
72 Likes, 15 Retweets
20) Because I firmly believe in less government! Unless it deals with a person's genitalia. In that case, I think the government should get on up in there, bigly!
#WhyImConservative #Snark
76 Likes, 9 Retweets
21) Deny. Deflect. Distort. Project.
#NervousDonald
60 Likes, 16 Retweets
22) Bow wow wow, yippy yo, yippy yay,
Trump impeached by the muthaf*ckin' House
#MusicForRepublicans
59 Likes, 12 Retweets
23) Because I know if I give the top 1% all of the food, no one will starve. It'll all just trickle down.
#WhyImConservative #Snark
62 Likes, 8 Retweets
24) Because I'm strongly pro-life! ...until birth...
#WhyImConservative #Snark
56 Likes, 10 Retweets
25) Obama reads from a teleprompter
GOP: "He's such an idiot!"
Trump tries spelling "teleprompter"
Trump: "t-e-l-l-a-, you know, frumpter."
GOP: "Brilliant! He's like Mensa smart!"
#TelePrompTer #Snark
52 Likes, 11 Retweets
26) We cage the little children
Most the children of the world
Red and yellow, black and brown
They aren't welcome in our town
We cage the little children of the world.
#MusicForRepublicans
41 Likes, 15 Retweets
27) In light of these investigations, I think I'm going to write a memo, type in it the words "NO PERSON IS ABOVE THE LAW" in large font, inaccurately refer to it as part of the U.S. Constitution, and tell Mueller to reopen the case.
#MuellerSpeaks
35 Likes, 13 Retweets
27) Happy Birthday, Mr. President Putin. Happy Birthday to you.
#MusicForRepublicans
40 Likes, 8 Retweets
27) If a protester threw a shoe at Trump...
Trump: "Well, that was thoughtful. I needed a pair of sneakers. Wait, where's the other one?"
#TrumpProtest #Snark
40 Likes, 8 Retweets
30) It does matter if you're black or white. Hee-hee.
#MusicForRepublicans
34 Likes, 9 Retweets
31) We're learning to lie
But we ain't got memories
Tellin' the truth
Is the hardest thing.
#MusicForRepublicans
30 Likes, 6 Retweets
32) Sign: "F*ck you, Trump!"
Trump: "That's British for 'fake news,' I think, so yeah, that was nice."
#TrumpProtest #Snark
12 Likes, 0 Retweets
33) Because I think stupid facts are like your opinion, man.
#WhyImConservative #Snark
10 Likes, 1 Retweet
Totals: 4,168 Likes, 1,072 Retweets (Averages of 126.3 Likes, 32.5 Retweets)
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