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The illusion of fantasy in online interaction

I'm curious to see a study regarding what I'm about to share and how accurate it is. It's been difficult for me to date since I moved to Ohio from Nebraska. Upon moving here about 4 years ago, I didn't know anyone. I've been working at home, so it's difficult for me to really meet people out at work. I don't go to church. I haven't been greatly involved in the community. I'll go out on weekends, but it can be difficult going to bars by yourself or with family and meeting a woman. So I resorted to this free online friend-making/dating site to try and meet some people. I've only really been active these past 4.5 months, I'd say. I've made a couple of "okay" friends - meaning we might comment on one another's Facebook pages, but that's about as far as it goes. The longer I stay on that site, the more I'm beginning to realize a few things, such as it seems that most men are on there just for sex and most women are on there just for attention. I've learned something else along the way too. It seems that many times people just join these sites and start talking with one particular person (or more) as an escape from reality. Without hearing this person's voice, seeing them face-to-face, they can kind of treat them like their fantasy - like a character in a romance novel. They can daydream about this person to help give them a more positive outlook on their day and even life. At the same time, they never have any intent on meeting this person. To them - they're just nice words on a screen and nothing beyond that. Unfortunately, the longer they talk and share complimentary and flirtatious words, the more apt the other is going to be to garner some sense of feeling for them and want to evolve the relationship...and unfortunately for them, they get their feelings hurt after such an admission, either through a direct rejection or being ignored.

I can completely understand wanting to escape reality for a while. This is one reason why people love film, television, music, art, literature, etc. However, what these people seem to fail to realize is that there is a living, breathing person on the other end of the screen - a person with a heart, with feelings, with the capability to love and also hurt. I wish more people would realize that, stop being so selfish and if they have no intent to evolve a relationship, to stop leading people on into believing it's going to happen.

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