I know I'll likely be viewed as a holiday grump or Grinch or some may even claim that since I'm single on Valentine's Day, I'm just jealous of couples celebrating the day with one another. I can state with great clarity that the latter portion of that sentence is false. Even when I was dating, I held the same feelings about this very holiday.
I find this day to be: Dull, unromantic, ridiculous and sad. Let me explain. I find it to be dull because I honestly don't see much excitement regarding the regular routine most couples go through year after year on February 14th. The man may deliver flowers (roses) to his girlfriend's/wife's workplace. On his way home from work, he may pick up a Hallmark card, some chocolates and a teddy bear, before possibly taking her out to eat. Some couples don't fall into this routine, but I know many who do and it makes me yawn just thinking about it.
I'll skip to my claim that the holiday is ridiculous. It's a capitalistic scheme at its finest. The holiday has basically conned men into purchasing "universally"-liked things out of feeling pressured and made to feel guilty if they don't do such a thing and it's conned women into believing that if not given these objects on February the 14th, it provides a clear illustration that her man doesn't genuinely love her and also, that above all 364 other days in the year, this is THE day when she deserves such gestures.
The holiday is sad, because it provides an easy cop-out for guys. They can treat all 364 other days similarly: Go to work, come home and watch tv, go to bed and not go out of their way to tell/show a woman that he loves her. He can then circle February 14th on the calendar and spend a few bucks at a grocery store on his way home from work to provide this wondrous day to his significant other. It's also sad because it tends to incite feelings of guilt, loneliness and/or depression. I read a recent study that 10% of women send themselves flowers at work on this day. They don't want to be the ones left out. Really? How about someone sending her flowers on another day when not another woman is sent them? The day doesn't really become about people whom are given gifts, but those that aren't.
I'm also going to go there - Valentine's Day is not romantic. Everyone is doing it! What's romantic about a man or a couple feeling obligated to purchase rather worthless things for one another on a day designated to celebrate their love for one another? What's romantic about their making reservations at a restaurant and just about every other couple there is there for the same exact reason? What's romantic about a man expressing his love to his significant other through words he didn't write, but purchased? What's romantic about a guy stopping by a store on the way home at his convenience, habitually purchasing items and not giving much thought, time or effort to them?
It's my firm belief that every single person should show and celebrate love on a daily basis. February 14th is but one day on the calendar. All it's there to do is reel in money. Really, a day to celebrate a couple's love? Why do couples really need that reminder? I'm hoping most don't. When I've been in relationships and looking toward the future, if/when I get involved again, I could care less if I get anything on February 14th. If my girlfriend/wife consistently displays her love for me, that's all I could ask for. It'd mean more to me for her to do something kind for me on a random day, where it's 100% voluntary, perhaps in noticing I feel down or something of the like. It'd mean a great deal more to me for her to provide me with a gift of some kind when I knew full well she didn't feel it to be obligatory. I never want someone to hand me a gift out of a feeling of obligation or do a favor for me because they feel it's almost mandatory. I want these words and gifts to come from the kindness of their heart and not a certain expectation that a capitalist society places upon them. If a woman takes my love for granted so much that she ONLY tries displaying her love to me on February 14th, then I'm sorry, but it's not going to work out. I would want my significant other to feel loved and special on a regular basis and this isn't going to happen through a one-day celebration of love when most all other couples are guilt-tripped into providing traditional gifts for their significant other. No, it's going to happen in times when I least expect it, times when I realize how much she truly knows and cares about me through the giving of a well-thought out gift or gesture of some kind. It's going to happen in times when we appear to stand apart from the other couples. It's going to happen when we regularly celebrate our own Valentine's Day and it appears as if no one else is.
I find this day to be: Dull, unromantic, ridiculous and sad. Let me explain. I find it to be dull because I honestly don't see much excitement regarding the regular routine most couples go through year after year on February 14th. The man may deliver flowers (roses) to his girlfriend's/wife's workplace. On his way home from work, he may pick up a Hallmark card, some chocolates and a teddy bear, before possibly taking her out to eat. Some couples don't fall into this routine, but I know many who do and it makes me yawn just thinking about it.
I'll skip to my claim that the holiday is ridiculous. It's a capitalistic scheme at its finest. The holiday has basically conned men into purchasing "universally"-liked things out of feeling pressured and made to feel guilty if they don't do such a thing and it's conned women into believing that if not given these objects on February the 14th, it provides a clear illustration that her man doesn't genuinely love her and also, that above all 364 other days in the year, this is THE day when she deserves such gestures.
The holiday is sad, because it provides an easy cop-out for guys. They can treat all 364 other days similarly: Go to work, come home and watch tv, go to bed and not go out of their way to tell/show a woman that he loves her. He can then circle February 14th on the calendar and spend a few bucks at a grocery store on his way home from work to provide this wondrous day to his significant other. It's also sad because it tends to incite feelings of guilt, loneliness and/or depression. I read a recent study that 10% of women send themselves flowers at work on this day. They don't want to be the ones left out. Really? How about someone sending her flowers on another day when not another woman is sent them? The day doesn't really become about people whom are given gifts, but those that aren't.
I'm also going to go there - Valentine's Day is not romantic. Everyone is doing it! What's romantic about a man or a couple feeling obligated to purchase rather worthless things for one another on a day designated to celebrate their love for one another? What's romantic about their making reservations at a restaurant and just about every other couple there is there for the same exact reason? What's romantic about a man expressing his love to his significant other through words he didn't write, but purchased? What's romantic about a guy stopping by a store on the way home at his convenience, habitually purchasing items and not giving much thought, time or effort to them?
It's my firm belief that every single person should show and celebrate love on a daily basis. February 14th is but one day on the calendar. All it's there to do is reel in money. Really, a day to celebrate a couple's love? Why do couples really need that reminder? I'm hoping most don't. When I've been in relationships and looking toward the future, if/when I get involved again, I could care less if I get anything on February 14th. If my girlfriend/wife consistently displays her love for me, that's all I could ask for. It'd mean more to me for her to do something kind for me on a random day, where it's 100% voluntary, perhaps in noticing I feel down or something of the like. It'd mean a great deal more to me for her to provide me with a gift of some kind when I knew full well she didn't feel it to be obligatory. I never want someone to hand me a gift out of a feeling of obligation or do a favor for me because they feel it's almost mandatory. I want these words and gifts to come from the kindness of their heart and not a certain expectation that a capitalist society places upon them. If a woman takes my love for granted so much that she ONLY tries displaying her love to me on February 14th, then I'm sorry, but it's not going to work out. I would want my significant other to feel loved and special on a regular basis and this isn't going to happen through a one-day celebration of love when most all other couples are guilt-tripped into providing traditional gifts for their significant other. No, it's going to happen in times when I least expect it, times when I realize how much she truly knows and cares about me through the giving of a well-thought out gift or gesture of some kind. It's going to happen in times when we appear to stand apart from the other couples. It's going to happen when we regularly celebrate our own Valentine's Day and it appears as if no one else is.
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