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To be a "real" man...

I've been reading Harlan Coben's critically-acclaimed Myron Bolitar series. It was recommended to me by both my mother and her sister. So, since we all quite thoroughly enjoy detective mystery books and all have similar senses of humor, I thought I'd give the series a gander. I just got through book #8 of the series (out of 10), Promise Me, and while I've promised myself (no pun intended) I'd get through the entire series and discuss it with my mom and aunt, I'm having trouble motivating myself to do so.

The books in this series are often times quick moving, entertaining, easy reads, which don't leave any lasting impact or provide what I call the "wow" factor. Since I've finished eight books in the series, it's quite obvious I haven't disliked them to a great degree. However, after each and every book, while there are some chuckles and tense moments along the way, as well as some unexpected twists and turns, I'm still left feeling kind of empty. I think this is because I don't feel anything for any of the characters, especially the main two (Myron and his sidekick in crime, Win).

The character development is very minimal throughout the series and what little we know about the characters appears to be mainly rooted in superficiality/shallowness, anger issues, and sexism.

Myron Bolitar starts off as a sports agent at MB Sports Reps, before partnering with his long-time assistant Esperanza, letting her handle the athletes, and deciding to represent other entertainers (actors, musicians, writers, and the like), which results in him altering the company's name to MB Reps. Esperanza is mainly showcased as a former wrestler that made men drool when she was in a bikini. Her friend, and former tag-team partner, Big Cyndi, is mainly showcased as a huge, nasty woman no man with eyes would ever want to interact with. Myron's long-time on-and-off again girlfriend, Jessica Culver, is a well-respected writer, however, she mostly gets talked about due to her supposedly outrageously good looks. Win admittedly sees women as nothing more than sex objects and regularly hires "attractive" hookers to partake in the horizontal mambo with him. Myron attempts to be more moral than Win when it comes to relationships and other areas of life, but more times than not, finds more of Win in himself than he'd like to believe (and no, that's not to be taken literally).

Even though Myron is technically a sports/celebrities' agent, he has a reputation for playing detective as well, and when he gets called upon to do so, he and Win open their bag of tricks to find a killer and/or a missing person. These tricks include: Concocting crazy theories and attempting to find one sliver of accuracy, speaking before thinking, getting into dangerous situations without any contemplation, beating up and torturing people, and yes, even killing people.

While there are times I chuckle at some of Bolitar's sarcastic remarks, he often times makes these comments when people are pointing guns at him and threatening to kill him. This results in me giving myself the ol' facepalm, and mumbling, "Are you really that stupid?" It's almost like he's asking for fights throughout these books, and even admits to feeling an "itch" when someone is aggravating him - an itch to punch the person. In these books, it appears as if the characters (and perhaps author) believe that, to be a real man, one must fornicate with as many "hot" women as possible and beat up as many men as possible. There was even a point in the most recent book I read, Promise Me, where Bolitar went off on a tangent about his old high school friend's husband, saying (I'll be paraphrasing here), "There was this one time in high school when he was challenged to a fight and he walked away. Sure, members of the media will say that was the right thing to do, but that's nonsense. Only wusses do that. You can't be a real man and do that, and to this day, he's never gotten over that. He's never felt like a real man."

Seriously? Some men still feel that way? Now, it'd be one thing for a man's wife's or child's life to truly be in danger and not to defend them. However, a silly high school fight? Really? He really believes a married, professional, 45-year-old father doesn't feel like a man today because he walked away from a fight in high school almost 30 years ago? Come on... Like with most things in life, I think people should look at what there is to gain versus what there is to lose when it comes to fights. If a person's life is truly in jeopardy, especially their wife's or child's, then yes, it would make sense to fight. However, if it's just over which person has the bigger ego, then potential lawsuits and jail time probably isn't worth the risk.

This old-school "real man" mentality displayed throughout the series reminds me of my grandfather. Growing up, he felt the need to fight and beat up other men in order to be constituted as a "real man." He felt the need to get drunk a lot and sleep with a lot of women to feel like a "real man." Luckily for me, my father wasn't/isn't like this. He felt being a real man was treating everyone equally, working hard, providing food for the family, providing opportunities for his kids, and making people laugh. I guess this is why, while I find the Bolitar series to be entertaining, I feel empty when finishing each book. I can't identify with the characters. I don't understand them, I can't feel anything for them, and this limits the overall impact of the books. I've never gotten into a fight, and sincerely hope I never feel the need to get into one, because the only reason I would do so would be to defend someone I greatly care about, like a wife or child. I honestly don't care if this makes me less of a "man" in some people's minds. In this context, I suppose I'd rather be a smart man than a "real" man.

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