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Happy Hollimasukkah!

It seems that on an annual basis, around this time of year, I hear people show anger or annoyance at those who express seasons greeting differently than them.

Emerald Fuddyduddy: "Happy Holidays!"

Russell Zoloft: "No, it's Merry Christmas! What are you, a fricking atheist?!?"

Fuddyduddy: "Seasons Greetings!"

Zoloft: "Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas! You can't spell 'Christ' without 'Christmas,' or something like that!"

I'm sorry, but who cares? Fox News likes to clamor on about an alleged "War on Christmas" because an increasing number of people are telling each other "Happy Holidays" as opposed to "Merry Christmas," but that's a bigger myth than Santa Claus being healthy enough to travel the world on December 25th of every year without facing any repercussions.

Again, who cares? It's not like when someone says "Happy Holidays," they're really saying, "Hey! Hey! Hey! You wanna know what I think about Christmas? F*ck you! F*ck you! F*ck you too! F*ck all of you!" No, they're simply saying, "I hope you have a safe and happy holiday season coming up with your friends, family, and loved ones." When someone says "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Hannukah" or "Happy Festivus," they're essentially expressing the same thing. Why must some of us take these greetings so personally? If, after I get married, 55% of people greet me by saying, "Congratulations!" while a handful of others say something along the lines of, "Way to go!" should I take the latter set of comments personally and feel offended by them? No, of course not. That'd be silly and would likely ruin a nice buzz if I focused too much on that.

I find it ironically humorous that many who complain about Christmas being stripped from us are the ones placing a damper on the holiday. Laugh, relax, enjoy time with your friends and family, and stop focusing on how others greet one another. Trust me, it'll make for a much happier holiday season for you and those around you. So, on that note, Happy Hollimasukkah!
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