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Why "locker-room talk" is a "bigly" sad excuse...

I know this seems like old news, but just recently I got into a debate with an individual about Donald Trump's leaked Access Hollywood tape, where he and Billy Bush engaged in what my debate opponent referred to as "locker-room talk."

So, first off, what is locker-room talk? According to the dictionary, it's, "Of, relating to, or suitable for use in a locker room; especially: of a course or sexual nature <locker-room talk>."

Let's now look at the full Access Hollywood transcript between Billy Bush and Donald Trump:

Donald Trump: "You know, and I moved on her actually. You know she was down on Palm Beach."

Unknown: "She used to be great. She's still very beautiful."

Trump: "I moved on her and I failed. I'll admit it. I did try and f*ck her. She was married."

Unknown: "That's huge news."

Trump: "No, no, Nancy. No, this was - and I moved on her very heavily. In fact, I took her out furniture shopping. She wanted to get some furniture. I said I'll show you where they have some nice furniture. I took her out furniture. I moved on her like a b*tch, but I couldn't get there, and she was married. Then all of a sudden I see her. She's now got the big phony tits and everything. She's totally changed her look."

Billy Bush: "Sheesh, your girl's hot as sh*t. In the purple."

Various: "Whoa! Yes! Whoa!"

Bush: "Yes! The Donald has scored. Whoa, my man!"

Trump: "Look at you. You are a pussy. Maybe it's a different one.'

Bush: "It better not be the publicist. No, it's her. It's..."

Trump: "Yeah, that's her. With the gold. I better use some Tic Tacs just in case I start kissing her. You know, I'm automatically attracted to beautiful - I just start kissing them. It's like a magnet. Just kiss. I don't even wait. And when you're a star, they let you do it. You can do anything."

Bush: "Whatever you want."

Trump: "Grab them by the pussy. You can do anything."

Bush: "Yeah, those legs. All I can see is the legs."

Trump: "Oh, it looks good."

Bush: "Come on, shorty."

Trump: "Oh, nice legs, huh?"

Bush: "Oof, get out of the way, honey. Oh, that's good legs. Go ahead."

Trump: "It's always good if you don't fall out of the bus. Like Ford, Gerald Ford, remember?"

Bush: "Down below. Pull the handle."

Trump: "Hello, how are you? Hi."

Arianne Zucker: "Hi, Mr. Trump. How are you?"

Trump: "Nice seeing you. Terrific, terrific. You know Billy Bush?"

Bush: "Hello, nice to see you. How you doing, Arianne?"

Zucker: "I'm doing very well, thank you. Are you ready to be a soap star?"

Trump: "We're ready. Let's go. Make me a soap star."

Bush: "How about a little hug for the Donald? He just got off the bus."

Zucker: "Would you like a little hug, darling?"

Trump: "Absolutely. Melania said this was okay."

Bush: "How about a little hug for the Bushy? I just got off the bus. Here we go. Excellent. Well, you've got a nice co-star here."

Trump: "Good. After you. Come on, Billy, don't be shy."

Bush: "Soon as a beautiful woman shows up he just, he takes off. This always happens."

Zucker: ""I'm sorry. Come here."

Bush: "Let the little guy in here, come on."

Zucker: "Yeah, let the little guy in. How you feel now? Better? I should actually be in the middle."

Bush: "It's hard to walk next to a guy like this. Yeah, you get in the middle. There we go."

Trump: "Good. That's better."

Zucker: "This is much better. This is..."

Trump: "That's better."

Bush: "Now, if you had to choose honestly between one of us. Me or the Donald?"

Trump: "I don't know. That's tough competition."

Zucker: "That's some pressure right there."

Bush: "Seriously, you had to take one of us as a date."

Zucker: "I have to take the Fifth on that one. Yep, I'll take both.'

Trump: "Which way?"

Zucker: "Make a right. Here we go."

Bush: "Here he goes. I'm gonna leave you here. Give me my microphone."

Trump: "Okay, okay. Oh, you're finished?"

Bush: "You're my man. Yeah."

Trump: "Oh, good."

Bush: "I'm gonna go do our show."

Zucker: "Oh, you want to reset? Okay."

Following the inevitable backlash, Donald Trump and his supporters resorted to the "it-was-just-locker-room-talk" defense. Sadly, many people bought it and he appears to be headed to the Oval Office in about a month. While such individuals apparently couldn't see it, there are multiple problems with this line of thinking.

First off, when was the last time Donald Trump was actually in a locker room? ...or many of his supporters? The individual who debated me on the matter confessed to not being in a locker room for years. So how are individuals who rarely ever situate themselves in a locker room long enough to hear banter between others able to state matter-of-factly that the discussion between Donald Trump and Billy Bush was nothing but "locker-room talk"?

Now, if they want to respond by saying something along the lines of, "Well, the term isn't meant to be taken literally. It's just a synonym for 'dirty talk,'" then okay. I would recommend altering the term if that's indeed the case, but alright, I'll play along.

Secondly, despite what Trump and his ilk would have you believe this form of "locker-room talk" is not common among guys. As a matter of fact, it's incredibly rare. Of all the guys I've interacted with, I'd say I'd never heard such comments from roughly 99% of them, and 99% of the remaining 1% were drunk at the time of making such utterances. Yes, guys may talk about how attractive a woman might be, or how it's a shame she's not single, or that they wish they could take her out on a date, but never in my life had I heard a man say, "(You could) Grab them by the pussy," before I heard Donald Trump do so in the Access Hollywood tape.

Lastly, there's a stark difference between "dirty talk" and sexual assault. While most people seemed to focus on the "Grab-them-by-the-pussy" remark, they seemed to bypass the most troubling statement in the discussion. When Trump said, "(You could) Grab them by the pussy," it's debatable whether or not he was speaking from experience or speaking hypothetically. However, that wasn't the case when he said this:

"Yeah, that's her. With the gold. I better use some Tic Tacs just in case I start kissing her. You know, I'm automatically attracted to beautiful - I just start kissing them. It's like a magnet. Just kiss. I don't even wait. And when you're a star, they let you do it. You can do anything."

In this comment, Donald Trump admits to sexually assaulting women. Unlike the "grab-them-by-the-pussy" line, this isn't hypothetical; it's actual. 

The definition of sexual assault is "any type of sexual contact or behavior that occurs without the explicit consent of the recipient..."

What did Trump say again? "...I just start kissing them. It's like a magnet. Just kiss. I don't even wait..."

Say whatever you'd like about Trump's other comments during the discussion, this particular statement wasn't locker-room talk; it was sexual-assault talk. It's one thing to compliment a woman on her physical appearance. It's quite another to describe how one is going to sexually assault her (or has in the past). The locker-room talk rationale is just an excuse - a sad attempt to weasel one's way out of criticism by attempting to legitimize sexist banter, but in actuality legitimizing both sexist banter and sexual assault. 

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/locker%E2%80%93room

https://mic.com/articles/156222/donald-trump-billy-bush-leaked-video-full-transcript-read-the-full-sexist-exchange-here#.Tg3fRmjU7

https://www.justice.gov/ovw/sexual-assault

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