Skip to main content

What I learned in Week 4 of the NFL season

In Week 4 of the NFL season, I learned that...

- ...Cleveland Browns tailback Nick Chubb's role model is obviously Forrest Gump: "I just started running!"

- ...refs know consistency like Pope Francis knows herpes.

- ..., due to how hard they're getting beat, Washington may want to change their nickname to the BlackAndBlueSkins.

- ..., no matter what object you look at, it could probably have played better defense than anyone on the LA Rams or Tampa Bay Buccaneers this past weekend. That paper airplane you see to your right? Yeah, that could have too.

- ...Cam Newton is suffering from a condition known as pussyfoot.

- ...the only thing more dangerous than Dr. Claw eyeing the nuclear button is the Chicago Bears defense.

- ...replays are as kind to the Detroit Lions as lightning is kind to Spectrum customers.

- ..., when asked about the new P.I.-challenge rule, Yoda reportedly said, "No f*cking idea, what pass interference is anymore, I have. Yes, hrrmmm."

- ..., after the season, it seems all but inevitable several NFL players will star in a porn, entitled, Hurdling Until Your Helmet Meets My Junk.

- ...the National Suicide Hotline number is now 1-800-BNGLSFN.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun...

Face guarding is legal in college football and the NFL

I just wanted to remind fans and announcers especially, that face guarding is legal in both college football and the NFL. It all comes down to contact. So long as a defender doesn't make contact with an intended receiver, he doesn't have to turn around to play the ball. I can't tell you how many times every week I hear announcers talk about face guarding being a penalty. It's not. I even heard one announcer yesterday state, "If the defender doesn't turn around and play the ball, the ref will call pass interference every time." That's simply not true. Courtesy of referee Bill LeMonnier, he says this with regard to the rule at the college level (answered on 8/12/13): "NCAA rules on pass interference require the face guarding to have contact to be a foul. No contact, no foul by NCAA rules." In the NFL rule book, this is written:  "Actions that constitute defensive pass interference include but are not limited to: (a) Contact by a ...