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A Phone Call Between RFK, Jr. and Donald Trump

This is how I picture a phone conversation between Donald Trump and RFK, Jr.

Trump: "Hello?"
Jr.: "Did you hear that?"
Trump: "Hear what?"
Jr.: "That voice. It was almost like it was speaking to me."
Trump: "That was me."
Jr.: "Who is this?"
Trump: "You called me."
Jr.: "What do I call you? I don't even know who you are."
Trump: "Donald Trump"
Jr.: "Oh, yeah, I've been meaning to call you."
Trump: "You just did."
Jr.: "When?"
Trump: "Just now"
Jr.: "But we've been on the phone for a couple of minutes."
Trump: "Okay, so a couple of minutes ago."
Jr.: "A couple of minutes ago what?"
Trump: "You called me."
Jr.: "Who are you again?"
Trump: "Donald Trump"
Jr.: "THE Donald Trump?"
Trump: "That's the one. I am he/him or whatever."
Jr.: "I thought you hated pronouns."
Trump: "I do."
Jr.: "Then what's with the he/him?"
Trump: "I don't know what you're talking about."
Jr.: "Anyway, I wanted to talk to you about an endorsement."
Trump: "That would be fantastic, just unbelievable."
Jr.: "First, though, I need to know a couple of things."
Trump: "Shoot"
Jr.: "What are your thoughts on vaccines?"
Trump: "Probably the biggest accomplishment of my presidency. I created them with my own bare hands to fight the Jiiina Virus. Amazing, amazing stuff."
Jr.: "Yeah, we may have a problem."
Trump: "What? What problem? I don't have any problems. Look at me. I am quite the specimen, if I do say so myself."
Jr.: "You just did."
Trump: "That's what I'm saying. So what's the problem?"
Jr.: "Vaccines are on the verge of destroying the universe."
Trump: "I find that hard to believe."
Jr.: "It's true." :: texts Trump a meme, which just says, "Vaccines destroying the universe" ::
Trump: "Wow, that's some pretty serious stuff, very serious."
Jr.: "That's what I mean. I don't think I can endorse you if you champion vaccines, whether you made them or not."
Trump: "I hate vaccines. Vaccines are stupid. You can't spell 'vaccine' without 'stupid.' That's a fact. Goggle it."
Jr.: "Thank you. I've been saying that for as long as I can remember."
Trump: "How long is that?"
Jr.: "What day is this?"
Trump: "Saturday, I think"
Jr.: "Then it was earlier today."
Trump: "You've got a good memory. I wish I could remember that well."
Jr.: "Oh, you can. Three words: Heroin."
Trump: "I'll have to look into that. Wait, does that involve needles?"
Jr.: "Yes"
Trump: "So you got the jab?"
Jr.: "You could say that."
Trump: "I just did."
Jr.: "Touche"
Trump: "Two-what? What is that, Russian?"
Jr.: "Si"
Trump: "I don't know what you're talking about right now, but I need to end this. Do I have your endorsement or not?"
Jr.: "Oui, oui"
Trump: "Whatever. I do need to go to the bathroom, though, so thanks for the reminder."
Jr.: "ou'reyay elcomeway"
Trump: "You're weird."
Jr.: "You too, my good man. It's truly an honor to endorse you."
Trump: "Finally! Was that so hard?"
Jr.: "There's that voice again. Where is it coming from?"
Trump: "I hear it too. I better go before they get any more information from us."
Jr.: "Don't talk. Don't say another word. Just hang up."
Trump: "That's good thinking."
Jr.: "But you're talking."
Trump: "So are you"
Jr.: "No, I'm not. I'm not talking. Nobody is talking."
Trump: "I'm not talking either."
Jr.: "So who is talking?"
Trump: "I don't know."
Trump/Jr.: "Ahhhhhhhhh!!!" :: they simultaneously hang up ::
#TrumpIsALaughingStock #VoteBlue

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