Here's how I picture Donald Trump and J.D. Vance strategizing, once the Kamala Harris-Tim Walz ticket was formed.
Vance: "So, what do we do, your highness?"
Trump: "Well, first off, Kamala's not black, not really. I mean, she's maybe a little darker than you, but she's about the same as me, and my skin is natural. Who knows what she's done to her's? It's like she just turned black overnight. I've been this color for as long as I can remember. So, at least 2 weeks."
Vance: "Brilliant! Also, as you've mentioned..."
Trump: "She's stupid."
Vance: "Not only that, but her..."
Trump: "She laughs. Who laughs? What's there to laugh about? Laughers are weak. That's why I never laugh. What else?"
Vance: "How about we attack veteran Walz? Everyone loves when we support attacking our troops."
Trump: "I'm so glad I picked you as my VP! Yes! Bigly! Also, since I've already gone after Kamala's alleged blackness thing, maybe you could help, go after her, you know..."
Vance: "Well, how about we don't go after her specifically, but women more broadly speaking."
Trump: "Go broadly after broads? I love it! I f*cking love it! Pacifics are just oceans anyways."
Vance: "Wait, so you think it's funny, but aren't laughing?"
Trump: "I told you what I think about laughing. Don't do it, J.D., don't do it."
Vance: "Okay, so back to the broadly broads. I say we go after women who don't have children and basically call them 'crazy cat ladies.' Then, let's go after post-menopausal women too."
Trump: "I don't even know what that is."
Vance: "Post-menopause?"
Trump: "No, cats"
Vance: "Seriously?"
Trump: "Of course not. Do you think I'm stupid?"
Vance: "I used to"
Trump: "What?"
Vance: "Nothing"
Trump: "So, we've gone after black people, veterans, women. Who's left?"
Vance: "How about Jews, Muslims, and Christians?"
Trump: "Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, and the terrorist?"
Vance: "I told you that joke."
Trump: "That was a good one."
Vance: "You're still not laughing."
Trump: "Nope, never. Democrats are the weird ones."
Vance: "So weird"
#MAGAIsSoWeird #VoteBlueAsifYourLivesDependonit
Vance: "So, what do we do, your highness?"
Trump: "Well, first off, Kamala's not black, not really. I mean, she's maybe a little darker than you, but she's about the same as me, and my skin is natural. Who knows what she's done to her's? It's like she just turned black overnight. I've been this color for as long as I can remember. So, at least 2 weeks."
Vance: "Brilliant! Also, as you've mentioned..."
Trump: "She's stupid."
Vance: "Not only that, but her..."
Trump: "She laughs. Who laughs? What's there to laugh about? Laughers are weak. That's why I never laugh. What else?"
Vance: "How about we attack veteran Walz? Everyone loves when we support attacking our troops."
Trump: "I'm so glad I picked you as my VP! Yes! Bigly! Also, since I've already gone after Kamala's alleged blackness thing, maybe you could help, go after her, you know..."
Vance: "Well, how about we don't go after her specifically, but women more broadly speaking."
Trump: "Go broadly after broads? I love it! I f*cking love it! Pacifics are just oceans anyways."
Vance: "Wait, so you think it's funny, but aren't laughing?"
Trump: "I told you what I think about laughing. Don't do it, J.D., don't do it."
Vance: "Okay, so back to the broadly broads. I say we go after women who don't have children and basically call them 'crazy cat ladies.' Then, let's go after post-menopausal women too."
Trump: "I don't even know what that is."
Vance: "Post-menopause?"
Trump: "No, cats"
Vance: "Seriously?"
Trump: "Of course not. Do you think I'm stupid?"
Vance: "I used to"
Trump: "What?"
Vance: "Nothing"
Trump: "So, we've gone after black people, veterans, women. Who's left?"
Vance: "How about Jews, Muslims, and Christians?"
Trump: "Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, and the terrorist?"
Vance: "I told you that joke."
Trump: "That was a good one."
Vance: "You're still not laughing."
Trump: "Nope, never. Democrats are the weird ones."
Vance: "So weird"
#MAGAIsSoWeird #VoteBlueAsifYourLivesDependonit
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