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Common Sense Sensitivity

Is it just me or does it appear as common sense is ever so lacking? Heck, like with OCD, I wonder if almost every person has at least one uncommon sense behavior/habit. With some people, it's with regard to the concept of time. If a person has many errands to run in a given day and has to be back at a certain time, common sense would dictate that they should leave at a certain time when, in preparation for traffic or other delays, they'll have very good odds of making it back on time. Also, common sense would dictate that they should start their errands at the destination furthest away from home, and slowly work their way back home. However, there are times when people don't handle things in such a manner, and the person waiting for them back at home may sigh and mumble to themselves, "Come on... Why didn't you go the route I suggested? It's just common sense! Geez!"

There are all common sense behaviors involved in: Cooking, cleaning, laundry, and pretty much any other daily activity, which some people refuse to follow. It's also common sense when it comes to running up the stairs while holding sharp objects (yes, it's probably not best to have that sharp end sticking up in case one trips). It's common sense not to clean a loaded gun. It's common sense not to ice skate in high heels. However, as common sense as these acts may appear to a large majority of people, they're still not followed by everybody.

Perhaps it's because I studied and earned three degrees in psychology, but I think the most common uncommon sense behaviors/habits I witness are with regard to people's sensitivities.

If a woman is beaten in her home, there's never a good time to joke about it, unless she's the one attempting to cope with the situation by telling a joke herself. At that point, if she's laughing, it would be okay to briefly smile as well, but is probably best not to add to the joke. That's just her way of coping and we all cope differently. All one can do is offer a listening ear (two hopefully) and be there for them in any way possible. It's also never a good time to bring up topics or images which remind the woman of the beating. If she brings it up in conversation, that's her opening up, and then is the time to seize on the opportunity as a friend, offer a shoulder to cry on, and perhaps provide some helpful (sensitive) advice. However, until she brings it up in conversation, while it's okay to simply ask how she's doing, it's never a good idea to instill in her thoughts or bring to her attention images which remind her of the situation. She's likely still continuing to heal and cope at this point, and the last thing she needs is to regress through the means of images. Again, this is all just common sense. It's psychology 101. However, many people fail with regard to these common sense rules.

I was recently called pretentious because I informed another that it was insensitive and discourteous to remind a person of a very difficult time through images. Images are powerful. If a woman is raped and hears the rapist's name several months, or even years, later, while she may feel a knot form in the pit of her stomach, that will be nothing compared to the nauseated sensation she'll feel if she sees his face. For a person, not in law enforcement, to show and remind her of that months or years later, is not only insensitive and discourteous, it's downright cruel. Common sense misdeeds often times take place with minimal damage done. However, when those common sense misdeeds come at the expense of a person's feelings, the pain and damage can linger far more (and longer) than the perpetrator of the misdeed realizes. Unfortunately, nowadays, it appears as if common sense is about as common as the dodo bird.

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