Skip to main content

The Good Die Now Act

President Donald Trump released a video today where he attempted to persuade supporters to convince Congress they should pass his new healthcare reform law, The Good Die Now Act. Here is the full transcript:

"My fellow Muricans. Now is the time to rise up and call your Congressmen to tell them, in order to consistently rise up yourselves, they need to pass my bigly good healthcare law, the Good Die Now Act. It's a million bajillion times better than Obamacare. Just the name is a quadzillion times better. I mean, look at it. Good is always great. Die kind of rhymes with fight. Now backwards is won. You see? Everything about it is just fantastic, believe me. ...and even though Obamacare isn't actually called Obamacare, the Affordable Care Act still has Obama in the title, which makes it like really really bad, okay? So if you want to get rid of invisible Obama from the title of the Affordable Care Act once and for all, call your Congressmen and tell them to vote for my Good Die Now Act. Remember, it's like that So-Crates dude said, 'It's better to die without Obama than to live with him.' That's a fact, people. Google it. ...and remember our motto: 'The Good Die Now Act - In order to live, you must first die.' Period. God bless you all and God bless the United States of Murica."
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun...
2 comments
Read more

The difference between "looking" and "checking out"

I may be way off with these numbers, but it's my approximation that at least 75% of individuals whom are involved in a serious relationship feel it's perfectly acceptable to "check out" members of the opposite sex they're not involved with. Meanwhile, approximately 25% either don't feel this is acceptable or aren't sure about the matter. I hadn't thought about this matter for a while, but since I've been dating a woman for about 8 months, the topic has been pondered about some. When reading or hearing others discuss this very issue, I often times hear comments similar to the following: "It's human nature to look." "There's nothing wrong with checking others out. I'm sure he/she does it too!" "It's fine to do it. Just don't tell your boyfriend/girlfriend about it or do it in front of them!" "It's natural to find people attractive." When observing the array of comments, I i...
Post a Comment
Read more