The Top Ten Things Less Affordable Than My New Book, "Trumplandia" (https://www.amazon.com/Trumplandia-Craig-Rozniecki-ebook/dp/B07QTDTRMK)
10. Tickets to the "$1" theater, which now cost $3.
9. Top-of-the-line items at The Dollar Store.
8. Five minutes at the penny slots after doing three wise men shots.
7. The latest CliffsNotes edition of the "How to Better Handle Your Finances" series, authored by someone who goes by the name Bankrupt Trump.
6. Being able to hear a robot repeatedly tell you, "Welcome. You've got mail," courtesy of America Online.
5. The Cheeto Jesus spray-tan.
4. Candy Crush diabetes boosts.
3. Deflated balls signed by Tom Brady.
2. The Bring-Your-"Friend"-Hunting-With-Dick-Cheney annual event.
1. (drumroll) Vladimir Putin's tape he calls "Brokeback Mountain 2," starring Lindsey Graham and Donald Trump.
10. Tickets to the "$1" theater, which now cost $3.
9. Top-of-the-line items at The Dollar Store.
8. Five minutes at the penny slots after doing three wise men shots.
7. The latest CliffsNotes edition of the "How to Better Handle Your Finances" series, authored by someone who goes by the name Bankrupt Trump.
6. Being able to hear a robot repeatedly tell you, "Welcome. You've got mail," courtesy of America Online.
5. The Cheeto Jesus spray-tan.
4. Candy Crush diabetes boosts.
3. Deflated balls signed by Tom Brady.
2. The Bring-Your-"Friend"-Hunting-With-Dick-Cheney annual event.
1. (drumroll) Vladimir Putin's tape he calls "Brokeback Mountain 2," starring Lindsey Graham and Donald Trump.
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