I had a bit of fun with the trending hashtags #NewTrumpCabinetPositions and #TrumpsFirstOrder on Twitter over the past week. Here are my posts, ordered from the most to the least popular (all my tweets can be viewed here - https://twitter.com/CraigRozniecki):
1) Department of Extramarital Affairs
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
306 Likes, 132 Retweets
2) To have the Constitution read to him for the first time
#TrumpsFirstOrder
283 Likes, 96 Retweets
2) Department of No, He Didn't Say That. Oh, You Have Video? That Was His Stunt Double.
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
286 Likes, 93 Retweets
4) Department of P*ssy Grabbing
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
208 Likes, 93 Retweets
5) Secretary of Spray Tanning
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
178 Likes, 62 Retweets
6) Environmental Destruction Agency
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
137 Likes, 89 Retweets
7) Department of Gropery
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
157 Likes, 67 Retweets
8) Department of Wrong, Wrong, Wrong
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
142 Likes, 60 Retweets
9) Department of Rich Tax-Evader Lives Matter
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
138 Likes, 51 Retweets
10) Department of Gold Toilet Security
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
127 Likes, 41 Retweets
11) Secretary of Telling It Like It Isn't
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
115 Likes, 37 Retweets
12) Department of Two Corinthians
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
112 Likes, 39 Retweets
13) "To nuke or not to nuke? Magic 8-Ball, what do you think?"
#TrumpsFirstOrder
98 Likes, 27 Retweets
14) Department of Rich Daddy Loans
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
79 Likes, 30 Retweets
15) To get his 75 pending lawsuits dismissed
#TrumpsFirstOrder
73 Likes, 24 Retweets
16) To take some time off in order to go nude horseback riding with Vladimir Putin
#TrumpsFirstOrder
69 Likes, 25 Retweets
17) President of Russia
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
62 Likes, 26 Retweets
18) Secretary of Denying Offensive Tweets
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
62 Likes, 21 Retweets
18) Secretary of White Supremacist Retweets
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
63 Likes, 20 Retweets
20) Department of the Poorly Educated
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
51 Likes, 22 Retweets
20) To build a big beautiful firewall to keep facts away
#TrumpsFirstOrder
57 Likes, 16 Retweets
22) Department of Douchery
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
39 Likes, 24 Retweets
23) Department of Bigly Education
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
42 Likes, 19 Retweets
24) Telling his sons to conduct an experiment with a freezer to disprove global warming
#TrumpsFirstOrder
45 Likes, 13 Retweets
25) Department of Rich Old White Guys (okay, this one is actually true)
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
42 Likes, 10 Retweets
26) Secretary of Contradictions
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
37 Likes, 14 Retweets
27) Department of Mistresses
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
38 Likes, 12 Retweets
28) To have his ghostwriter start the new book, "How to Make Russia Great Again"
#TrumpsFirstOrder
35 Likes, 13 Retweets
29) Department of Alternate Reality
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
29 Likes, 14 Retweets
30) Department of Making America Grate Again
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
29 Likes, 13 Retweets
30) "From this day forward, everyone shall refer to me as Mr. Bigly."
#TrumpsFirstOrder
34 Likes, 8 Retweets
30) Department of Wherever, Whoever, However, and Whatever
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
35 Likes, 7 Retweets
33) To name himself the Secretary of Douchebaggery
#TrumpsFirstOrder
30 Likes, 11 Retweets
34) Secretary of Idiocracy
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
30 Likes, 9 Retweets
34) Secretary of You Can't Always Get What You Want
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
31 Likes, 8 Retweets
36) Telling fathers to provide their kids with "very very small" $1 million loans
#TrumpsFirstOrder
26 Likes, 12 Retweets
36) Department of Fact-Checking Fact-Checkers
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
32 Likes, 6 Retweets
38) Secretary of http://RussianSingles.com
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
25 Likes, 12 Retweets
38) Secretary of the Daily National Enquirer Briefing
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
28 Likes, 9 Retweets
38) To make our national book "Two Corinthians"
#TrumpsFirstOrder
29 Likes, 8 Retweets
38) Angry Gibberish Translator
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
31 Likes, 6 Retweets
42) The Con-Science Department
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
25 Likes, 11 Retweets
43) Secretary of Projection
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
26 Likes, 9 Retweets
44) Department Sh*t Jesus Wouldn't Do
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
24 Likes, 10 Retweets
45) Department of Denial
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
23 Likes, 10 Retweets
45) Department of Drumpf's Insecurity
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
24 Likes, 9 Retweets
45) Secretary of The Best Words
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
24 Likes, 9 Retweets
48) To make a cameo in another porn - this one by the title of, "Orange Is the New Shrinkage"
#TrumpsFirstOrder
26 Likes, 5 Retweets
49) Department of Crookedness
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
23 Likes, 7 Retweets
50) Department of Overcompensation
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
23 Likes, 5 Retweets
51) Department of Devolution
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
19 Likes, 5 Retweets
52) Department That's What She Said (Michelle Obama)
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
17 Likes, 5 Retweets
53) Department of Sign Violence Prevention
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
17 Likes, 4 Retweets
54) Orange Man's Chief of Staff
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
16 Likes, 3 Retweets
55) Department of Bigly Big League
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
15 Likes, 3 Retweets
56) To make Donald Drumpf again
#TrumpsFirstOrder
14 Likes, 3 Retweets
57) Department of Defending DT's Fallacies
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
11 Likes, 5 Retweets
58) Department of Like Treasuring Treasured Treasury or Something
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
10 Likes, 3 Retweets
Totals: 3,807 Likes, 1,405 Retweets (Averages of 65.6 Likes, 24.2 Retweets)
1) Department of Extramarital Affairs
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
306 Likes, 132 Retweets
2) To have the Constitution read to him for the first time
#TrumpsFirstOrder
283 Likes, 96 Retweets
2) Department of No, He Didn't Say That. Oh, You Have Video? That Was His Stunt Double.
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
286 Likes, 93 Retweets
4) Department of P*ssy Grabbing
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
208 Likes, 93 Retweets
5) Secretary of Spray Tanning
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
178 Likes, 62 Retweets
6) Environmental Destruction Agency
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
137 Likes, 89 Retweets
7) Department of Gropery
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
157 Likes, 67 Retweets
8) Department of Wrong, Wrong, Wrong
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
142 Likes, 60 Retweets
9) Department of Rich Tax-Evader Lives Matter
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
138 Likes, 51 Retweets
10) Department of Gold Toilet Security
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
127 Likes, 41 Retweets
11) Secretary of Telling It Like It Isn't
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
115 Likes, 37 Retweets
12) Department of Two Corinthians
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
112 Likes, 39 Retweets
13) "To nuke or not to nuke? Magic 8-Ball, what do you think?"
#TrumpsFirstOrder
98 Likes, 27 Retweets
14) Department of Rich Daddy Loans
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
79 Likes, 30 Retweets
15) To get his 75 pending lawsuits dismissed
#TrumpsFirstOrder
73 Likes, 24 Retweets
16) To take some time off in order to go nude horseback riding with Vladimir Putin
#TrumpsFirstOrder
69 Likes, 25 Retweets
17) President of Russia
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
62 Likes, 26 Retweets
18) Secretary of Denying Offensive Tweets
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
62 Likes, 21 Retweets
18) Secretary of White Supremacist Retweets
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
63 Likes, 20 Retweets
20) Department of the Poorly Educated
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
51 Likes, 22 Retweets
20) To build a big beautiful firewall to keep facts away
#TrumpsFirstOrder
57 Likes, 16 Retweets
22) Department of Douchery
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
39 Likes, 24 Retweets
23) Department of Bigly Education
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
42 Likes, 19 Retweets
24) Telling his sons to conduct an experiment with a freezer to disprove global warming
#TrumpsFirstOrder
45 Likes, 13 Retweets
25) Department of Rich Old White Guys (okay, this one is actually true)
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
42 Likes, 10 Retweets
26) Secretary of Contradictions
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
37 Likes, 14 Retweets
27) Department of Mistresses
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
38 Likes, 12 Retweets
28) To have his ghostwriter start the new book, "How to Make Russia Great Again"
#TrumpsFirstOrder
35 Likes, 13 Retweets
29) Department of Alternate Reality
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
29 Likes, 14 Retweets
30) Department of Making America Grate Again
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
29 Likes, 13 Retweets
30) "From this day forward, everyone shall refer to me as Mr. Bigly."
#TrumpsFirstOrder
34 Likes, 8 Retweets
30) Department of Wherever, Whoever, However, and Whatever
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
35 Likes, 7 Retweets
33) To name himself the Secretary of Douchebaggery
#TrumpsFirstOrder
30 Likes, 11 Retweets
34) Secretary of Idiocracy
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
30 Likes, 9 Retweets
34) Secretary of You Can't Always Get What You Want
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
31 Likes, 8 Retweets
36) Telling fathers to provide their kids with "very very small" $1 million loans
#TrumpsFirstOrder
26 Likes, 12 Retweets
36) Department of Fact-Checking Fact-Checkers
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
32 Likes, 6 Retweets
38) Secretary of http://RussianSingles.com
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
25 Likes, 12 Retweets
38) Secretary of the Daily National Enquirer Briefing
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
28 Likes, 9 Retweets
38) To make our national book "Two Corinthians"
#TrumpsFirstOrder
29 Likes, 8 Retweets
38) Angry Gibberish Translator
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
31 Likes, 6 Retweets
42) The Con-Science Department
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
25 Likes, 11 Retweets
43) Secretary of Projection
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
26 Likes, 9 Retweets
44) Department Sh*t Jesus Wouldn't Do
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
24 Likes, 10 Retweets
45) Department of Denial
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
23 Likes, 10 Retweets
45) Department of Drumpf's Insecurity
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
24 Likes, 9 Retweets
45) Secretary of The Best Words
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
24 Likes, 9 Retweets
48) To make a cameo in another porn - this one by the title of, "Orange Is the New Shrinkage"
#TrumpsFirstOrder
26 Likes, 5 Retweets
49) Department of Crookedness
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
23 Likes, 7 Retweets
50) Department of Overcompensation
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
23 Likes, 5 Retweets
51) Department of Devolution
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
19 Likes, 5 Retweets
52) Department That's What She Said (Michelle Obama)
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
17 Likes, 5 Retweets
53) Department of Sign Violence Prevention
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
17 Likes, 4 Retweets
54) Orange Man's Chief of Staff
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
16 Likes, 3 Retweets
55) Department of Bigly Big League
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
15 Likes, 3 Retweets
56) To make Donald Drumpf again
#TrumpsFirstOrder
14 Likes, 3 Retweets
57) Department of Defending DT's Fallacies
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
11 Likes, 5 Retweets
58) Department of Like Treasuring Treasured Treasury or Something
#NewTrumpCabinetPositions
10 Likes, 3 Retweets
Totals: 3,807 Likes, 1,405 Retweets (Averages of 65.6 Likes, 24.2 Retweets)
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