I've always been a staunch supporter of the LGBT community. For as long as I can remember, as with all demographics, I've fought for them attaining equal rights in this country. Of what value is freedom if not every person is legally allowed to access it? Having said all that, I started feeling old over this past Christmas season when I was approached by a person who came out to me as "non-binary." LGBT: Lesbians, Gays, Bisexuals, Transgenders. That's what I know. Non-binary? What in the world is that? Hating the feeling of being ignorant on a topic, I decided to research the term and here's what I found.
"Genderqueer, also known as non-binary, is a catch all category for gender identities that are not exclusively masculine or feminine - identities which are outside the gender binary and cisnormativity. Genderqueer people may express a combination of masculinity and femininity, or neither, in their gender expression.
Genderqueer people may identify as either having an overlap of, or indefinite lines between, gender identity; having two or more genders (being bigender, trigender, or pangender); having no gender (being agender, nongendered, genderless, genderfree, or neutrois); moving between genders or having a fluctuating gender identity (genderfluid); or being third gender or other-gendered, a category which includes those who do not place a name to their gender.
Gender identity is separate from sexual or romantic orientation, and genderqueer people have a variety of sexual orientations, just as transgender and cisgender people do."
In addition to that, I stumbled upon this:
"...genderqueer has been used as an adjective to refer to any people who transgress distinctions of gender; regardless of their self-defined gender identity, or who 'queer' gender. Individuals may express gender non-normatively by not conforming into the binary gender categories of 'man' and 'woman'. Genderqueer is often used to self-identify by people who challenge binary social constructions of gender.
The term has also been applied by those describing what they see as a gender ambiguity. Androgynous (also androgyne) is frequently used as a descriptive term for people in this category. This is because the term androgyny is closely associated with a blend of socially defined masculine and feminine traits. However, not all genderqueer persons identify as androgynous. Some genderqueer people identify as a masculine woman or a feminine man or combine genderqueer with another gender option."
Got all that? I hope you do, because I'm now even more confused...
Who is exclusively masculine or feminine? Even Arnold Schwarzenegger would admit to having some more feminine qualities. Also, how do we discern between what's masculine and feminine? Physical strength is often seen as masculine, yet there are female bodybuilders, and which sex has to go through the pain-staking event known as pregnancy and labor? Women. So how can we say, with a straight face, that physical strength is exclusively masculine? Simple, we can't.
On the flip-side, what is wrong with a man exhibiting empathy? Does this make him "non-binary," since empathy is often times considered to be a feminine trait? Is there a certain scale to illustrate the level of empathy that is necessary to be feminine? Wouldn't the country and world be a little better off if male leaders possessed more empathy?
Given the technical definition of the term, doesn't non-binary kind of play into social stereotypes? Why is it wrong for a woman to enjoy sports like football and music like heavy metal? Why is it wrong for a man to enjoy poetry and foreign films? Why can't we just see them as the people they are without attaching a label to them?
In my opinion, the terms masculine and feminine are becoming increasingly more subjective and it's somewhat counterproductive to draw attention to oneself for having a blend of these qualities when everyone else does. Perhaps if we stopped spending so much time finding a label for everything and spent more time just accepting people for who they are, we'd be a happier, more unified country.
"Genderqueer, also known as non-binary, is a catch all category for gender identities that are not exclusively masculine or feminine - identities which are outside the gender binary and cisnormativity. Genderqueer people may express a combination of masculinity and femininity, or neither, in their gender expression.
Genderqueer people may identify as either having an overlap of, or indefinite lines between, gender identity; having two or more genders (being bigender, trigender, or pangender); having no gender (being agender, nongendered, genderless, genderfree, or neutrois); moving between genders or having a fluctuating gender identity (genderfluid); or being third gender or other-gendered, a category which includes those who do not place a name to their gender.
Gender identity is separate from sexual or romantic orientation, and genderqueer people have a variety of sexual orientations, just as transgender and cisgender people do."
In addition to that, I stumbled upon this:
"...genderqueer has been used as an adjective to refer to any people who transgress distinctions of gender; regardless of their self-defined gender identity, or who 'queer' gender. Individuals may express gender non-normatively by not conforming into the binary gender categories of 'man' and 'woman'. Genderqueer is often used to self-identify by people who challenge binary social constructions of gender.
The term has also been applied by those describing what they see as a gender ambiguity. Androgynous (also androgyne) is frequently used as a descriptive term for people in this category. This is because the term androgyny is closely associated with a blend of socially defined masculine and feminine traits. However, not all genderqueer persons identify as androgynous. Some genderqueer people identify as a masculine woman or a feminine man or combine genderqueer with another gender option."
Got all that? I hope you do, because I'm now even more confused...
Who is exclusively masculine or feminine? Even Arnold Schwarzenegger would admit to having some more feminine qualities. Also, how do we discern between what's masculine and feminine? Physical strength is often seen as masculine, yet there are female bodybuilders, and which sex has to go through the pain-staking event known as pregnancy and labor? Women. So how can we say, with a straight face, that physical strength is exclusively masculine? Simple, we can't.
On the flip-side, what is wrong with a man exhibiting empathy? Does this make him "non-binary," since empathy is often times considered to be a feminine trait? Is there a certain scale to illustrate the level of empathy that is necessary to be feminine? Wouldn't the country and world be a little better off if male leaders possessed more empathy?
Given the technical definition of the term, doesn't non-binary kind of play into social stereotypes? Why is it wrong for a woman to enjoy sports like football and music like heavy metal? Why is it wrong for a man to enjoy poetry and foreign films? Why can't we just see them as the people they are without attaching a label to them?
In my opinion, the terms masculine and feminine are becoming increasingly more subjective and it's somewhat counterproductive to draw attention to oneself for having a blend of these qualities when everyone else does. Perhaps if we stopped spending so much time finding a label for everything and spent more time just accepting people for who they are, we'd be a happier, more unified country.
I appreciate your insightful comments and thoughts. This is a fairly recent subject for me as well. I don't know if it's due to my naturally blunt nature or what, but I've never really been one to try to make things overly complicated. I just do my thing, and it is what it is, so take it or leave it people. I'm with you, just be who you are, no labels required, and appreciate everyone else's right to do the same. So if I feel like papercrafting till I'm blue in the face, inventing the latest, greatest paleo creation in my kitchen, climbing a tree just because it's there, riding a pallet jack like a scooter, playing Contra on the original NES on a 72" screen because it's awesome, throwing gigantic bags of cat food over my shoulder because, who needs a cart lol, while going on to feed anyone that looks hungry whether they have hands, paws, or whatever (don't worry, I have people food for the non furry people lol), assembling kitchen islands, baker's racks, a king-sized bed, or an elliptical machine by myself because I can, I will and I'm not worried about whether or not all that stuff fits within someone else's predefined label of how a girl is supposed to be. So guys, feel your feelings with zero apologies, and girls, if you like hockey or football or both, enjoy it as much as you'd like. Your life is just as much yours as my life is mine, so let's do our best to enjoy them the best we can and encourage others to do the same. Great post Craig, keep up the good work... :)
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