I've been more active than usual with trending Twitter hashtags over the past couple of weeks. Here are my posts, ordered from the most popular to the least popular (all my tweets can be seen here - https://twitter.com/CraigRozniecki):
1) Dear Trumpsters:
Let me get this straight; it's unacceptable to kneel during the anthem to protest police brutality/racial oppression, as it's disrespectful to veterans, yet it's perfectly acceptable to mock, insult, & harass a Native American veteran to his face? Gotcha...
#MAGA
1,930 Likes, 886 Retweets
2) Trump: "Build a wall. Terrorists. Drugs. Rapists. Blah blah blah. Yada yada yada. Wah! Whatever. Where's my f*ckin' Adderall?"
Schumer and Pelosi: "Whatever he said, it's bullsh*t. Thank you. God bless America."
#TrumpSpeech #DemocraticResponse #Snark
1,042 Likes, 298 Retweets
3) When whites misbehave/commit a crime
GOP: "They're just kids. Boys will be boys. It's locker-room talk. He's a lone wolf."
When non-whites commit the same acts
GOP: "They're thugs. No excuse. They need to be punished. This is part of a larger problem."
#CovingtonCatholic
592 Likes, 236 Retweets
4) It's unthinkable that a guy can lie 70% of the time, cheat on three wives, be accused by 20+ women of sexual impropriety, be a draft dodger, be a grifter, be in bed with Russia, yet still be lauded as a patriotic Christian by his base.
#TrumpUnthinkable
547 Likes, 218 Retweets
5) Sadly, it appears as though Donald Trump has been a role model to many children, as the kids who mocked and harassed Nathan Phillips illustrated. Even in the face of video evidence, they deny, distort, don't take responsibility, and play the victim card.
#CovingtonCatholic
403 Likes, 142 Retweets
6) It's unthinkable that a guy receives $400M+ from his dad, goes bankrupt 6 times, consistently cheats his workers and country, is discovered to be a fraud, is perhaps the world's worst negotiator, yet his base sees him as a genius businessman.
#TrumpUnthinkable
357 Likes, 123 Retweets
7) Trump: "If I give you a lil' sumthin' sumthin', you have to give me a big beautiful steel concrete plastic styrofoam rubber invisible blow-up doll wall. Capisce?"
#DidTrumpOpenGovernmentYet #Snark
366 Likes, 97 Retweets
8) Senator Kennedy (R-LA): "Are you Roman Catholic? Do you think that should disqualify you from this position? Can Bob Mueller take care of himself? Is he a big boy? Have you ever seen a wall? Does 'wall' rhyme with 'ball'? Do you like the breadsticks at Olive Garden?"
#Barr #Snark
320 Likes, 80 Retweets
9) What a Trumpster just told me: "The Native approached the kids, not the other way around!"
You heard it here first: According to Trumpsters, if a veteran approaches you, it's your duty to mock and harass him/her. Such patriotic little schlubs, they are...
#CovingtonCatholic
290 Likes, 92 Retweets
10) Trump: "We need to build a wall :: sniff sniff :: because of all the drugs that are coming :: sniff :: in :: sniff ::. So many drugs, so little time :: sniff sniff sniff ::. I am so against these drugs :: sniff sniff ::. Like, bigly :: sniff ::."
#BoycottTrumpPrimeTime #Snark
261 Likes, 101 Retweets
11) Trump: "We need a wall! National emergency!"
1955-2018 (64 years): 33,282 illegal immigrants were arrested for homicide (not necessarily convicted)
1999-2017 (19 years): 589,527 were killed by guns
64-year pace: 2,096,128
How about passing gun laws instead?
#TrumpShutdown
212 Likes, 102 Retweets
12) Trump: "Give me a wall and I'll give you something like really nice."
What Dems' response should be: "Take your wall and shove it. We don't negotiate with terrorists."
#DidTrumpOpenGovernmentYet
204 Likes, 61 Retweets
13) Trump: "I'm the best negotiator in history. I want a wall."
Dems: "No!"
Trump: "Give me a wall."
Dems: "Never!"
Trump: "How about now?"
Dems: "No chance"
Trump: "The best negotiator, folks, believe me."
#DidTrumpOpenGovernmentYet
#Snark
187 Likes, 57 Retweets
14) #LaraTrump: "Sure, federal workers going a month without pay is a bit of a pain, but a wall is so much bigger than any one person."
Translation: "Not having food is a bit of a pain, but keeping Mexicans out of this country is more important than any starving child."
162 Likes, 70 Retweets
15) Trumpsters: "I was merely trying to calm the situation, because nothing calms a situation like getting into a stare-down while blocking someone's path."
#CovingtonCatholic #Snark
145 Likes, 44 Retweets
16) Trump: "I've made billions while not working a day in my life because of a rich daddy, so I relate to all of you. Drugs are coming in, which is very bad. I love Adderall. I owned this shutdown, but it's the Democrats' fault. :: sniff :: The end :: sniff ::."
#TrumpAddress #Snark
145 Likes, 38 Retweets
17) Vietnam veteran Nathan Phillips: "These white kids attacked some African-Americans; threw beer cans at me; and said some really nasty, racist things."
Trumpsters: "I think the media owes these white kids an apology."
This is the Dick Cheney shooting all over again...
#MAGA
127 Likes, 40 Retweets
18) Dear Trumpsters:
Please stop sending me edited YouTube videos of the #CovingtonCatholic interaction. YouTube is about as reliable a source for news as admitting one has herpes on a first date is a guarantee for a second one.
119 Likes, 22 Retweets
19) Then
GOPers: "What's wrong with the kids today?!? They need to learn how to respect authority!"
Now
GOPers: "Disrespecting a Vietnam vet? Now that's more like it! These kids are all right."
#CovingtonCatholic
106 Likes, 33 Retweets
20) Arrests in Development
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
120 Likes, 12 Retweets
21) What a Trumpster just told me: "Black nationalists call white kids names. Natives tell them to go back to Europe. Whites wear hats & smile. The whites are the bad ones. This is the American left."
No, this is what happens when you move to never-never land...
#CovingtonCatholic
102 Likes, 28 Retweets
22) Dear Trumpsters:
If you think those reporting and calling out your misbehavior are stupid, perhaps you should stop saying and doing stupid things. Just a thought. You're welcome.
#CovingtonCatholic
106 Likes, 23 Retweets
23) Pence: "I'm deeply offended by people criticizing my wife for working at a school which regularly practices discrimination. When my boss brags about sexually assaulting women, however, I'm not at all offended, because I'm all about consistency, logic, & Jesus."
#KarenPence #Snark
87 Likes, 37 Retweets
24) Out of the blue, one man punches another man in the face.
GOP: "You know, if that second man weren't there and wasn't in the way of the other man's fist, this never would have happened. So both are at fault."
#TrumpShutdown
94 Likes, 24 Retweets
25) President Deal-Maker
Trump: "I want a wall."
"No"
"I said I want a wall!"
"No!"
"Dammit, give me a wall!"
"No!"
"Alright, fine! I'm out of here!"
#TheArtOfADeal #TrumpShutdown #Snark
89 Likes, 28 Retweets
26) What do you do when white kids mock, insult, harass, and attack a Native American Vietnam vet?"
Trumpsters: "Blame the blacks!"
#CovingtonCatholicHighSchool
88 Likes, 28 Retweets
27) Headline: "Right-wing activist Laura Loomer jumps fence and trespasses onto Nancy Pelosi's property"
Build a wall! Keep her out! She's a danger to our yards! Oh, wait, she just unintentionally proved walls/fences don't work. Nicely done!
#LauraLoomer #TrumpShutown
84 Likes, 25 Retweets
28) Then
Trump: "The polls are rigged. Election is rigged."
Now
You were actually right and it was you doing the rigging.
#MichaelCohen
72 Likes, 29 Retweets
29) Trump: "A wall will help greatly reduce the drug problem in this country, so we should build a wall. Stronger gun laws will greatly reduce gun violence, so we shouldn't pass more gun laws, because logic, bigly."
#DidTrumpOpenGovernmentYet #Snark
71 Likes, 29 Retweets
30) Trump: "I'm going to distract the American people of all the bad things that happened surrounding me today by giving the most boring speech in history - a speech so boring, it'll make Ben Stein sound like a coked-up motivational speaker."
#TrumpAddress #Snark
84 Likes, 15 Retweets
31) What's wrong with our country is millions of people can't get over a war that ended over 150 years ago and the changes that came with it. (Pt. 2)
#CovingtonCatholic
75 Likes, 23 Retweets
32) Trump: "Its unthinkable that I speak at a 3rd grade levill, can't reed telepromters, have the best werds, taught the world about covfefe, and people still think I'm like stoopid or sumthing. Fake news!"
#TrumpUnthinkable #Snark
77 Likes, 18 Retweets
33) I really think Weird Al should parody Trump courtesy of Pink Floyd in the song, "Another Dick For a Wall."
#BoycottTrumpPrimeTime
75 Likes, 12 Retweets
34) National Emergency Countdown (15 minutes):
Donald Trump is about to give a speech which includes nothing but rambling-alternative-fact-fake-news-misinformed-3rd-grade-level-gibberish gobbledygook. In other words, it'll be just like any other time he speaks.
#BoycottTrumpPrimeTime
56 Likes, 23 Retweets
34) Ben Shapiro: "The truth is no pro-life person would kill baby Hitler. Baby Hitler was a baby."
Yes, because nothing says "pro-life" like sparing one baby's life at the expense of over 6 million others.
https://encyclopedia.ushmm.org/content/en/article/documenting-numbers-of-victims-of-the-holocaust-and-nazi-persecution …
#BabyHitler
57 Likes, 22 Retweets
36) Trump: "It's winter. Winter is cold. Cold brings snow. So much for global warming."
What an idiot. I'm guessing he learned that logic at Trump University...
#Snowstorm
63 Likes, 15 Retweets
36) I was told by a Trumpster that our criticism of the kids harassing the Vietnam vet/our defense of said vet are what's wrong with the country, our hate. No, that's asinine to the point of insane it's so ridiculous. Here's what's wrong with our country... (pt. 1)
#CovingtonCatholic
65 Likes, 13 Retweets
38) I wonder when Nathan Phillips, whose people had their land taken from them by whites yet still fought for the country he loved in war, suggested we build a wall. Oh, that's right, he didn't.
#CovingtonCatholic #BuildBridgesNotWalls #EndTheShutdown
62 Likes, 15 Retweets
39) Dear Trumpsters:
You can't edit history, post the revision on YouTube, and claim your portrayal is what really happened. Try doing that after a girlfriend catches you cheating on her. Unless her name is Sarah Huckabee-Sanders, she's not going to buy it.
#MAGA
56 Likes, 20 Retweets
39) Dear Dotard-in-Chief:
Remember that song you often played at the end of rallies? Perhaps you should listen a little more closely to the lyrics & think about applying them to yourself & the wall. What was that, Mick? "You can't always get what you want."
#DidTrumpOpenGovernmentYet
62 Likes, 14 Retweets
41) Dear GOP:
Some words of advice: If you want your faux outrage regarding Steve King's racism to come across as even halfway genuine, stop blindly supporting the Racist-In-Chief, Donald Trump.
#SteveKing #RepKing
51 Likes, 23 Retweets
42) Just imagine if a white anti-gun control Vietnam veteran was singing a "patriotic" song while in the midst of a diverse group of kids at a March For Our Lives rally & was mocked by said kids. What would the right's reaction be? Starkly different than it is now.
#CovingtonCatholic
62 Likes, 10 Retweets
43) Trump: "I already shut down the government to distract from the Mueller probe. That new Buzzfeed article screwed up that strategery. Wait, I'm gonna shut down the government even harder now! How? I don't know, but it'll be the best, biggest shutdown ever!"
#Buzzfeed #Snark
57 Likes, 13 Retweets
44) What's wrong with this country is that money is often times seen of greater value than humanity. (Pt. 10)
#CovingtonCatholic
50 Likes, 16 Retweets
45) BREAKING NEWS: "I just found Mitch!"
#WhereIsMitch
51 Likes, 13 Retweets
46) Trump: "It's unthinkable that I built a big, beautiful, invisible wall along our druggie-rapist border and don't get any credit for it, even as I snort Adderall on live television while telling everyone about it. So not fair!"
#TrumpUnthinkable #Snark
51 Likes, 9 Retweets
47) #ImpeachTrump, because a wall will soon be built around him, where he'll be provided clothing which match his spray tan.
41 Likes, 18 Retweets
48) Comparing Barr/Kavanaugh if Barr were asked the same questions as Kavanaugh
Kavanaugh: "I like beer! Beer! Did you hear me?!? BEER! Let's boof!"
Barr: "Do I like beer? I don't know. I'll have to get back to you on that. Oh, and I haven't heard 'boof' in 30 years."
#Barr #Snark
50 Likes, 8 Retweets
49) They're showing highlights (lowlights) of the speech on MSNBC. Holy boring! Forget Melatonin and Ambien. Just listen to five seconds of this dull, unenergetic, monotone speech and you'll be out!
#TrumpAddress
50 Likes, 5 Retweets
50) Instead of displaying "Support Our Troops!" bumper stickers on their cars, perhaps Trumpsters should display a bumper sticker which reads, "Support Our Troops! ...unless a Native American vet gets harassed by some white kids wearing MAGA hats."
#CovingtonCatholicSchool
40 Likes, 14 Retweets
51) Giuliani: "Trump ran the greatest campaign in history. Now, he didn't collude with Russia, but his campaign might have, for he had nothing to do with his campaign."
#Giuliani #Snark
42 Likes, 10 Retweets
51) What's wrong with our country is the sense of superiority rich straight white Christian men have always felt, who mistake privilege with equality. (Pt. 3)
#CovingtonCatholic
42 Likes, 10 Retweets
51) What's wrong with this country is the cherry-picking of scripture to support one's agenda, brainwashing millions through this, and instilling hate and anger as a result. (Pt. 8)
#CovingtonCatholic
42 Likes, 10 Retweets
54) #ImpeachTrump because he once tweeted about "peach on earth" and there's no better way to bring "peach on earth" than impeaching the Dotard-in-Chief.
36 Likes, 15 Retweets
54) Headline: "House GOP strips Steve King of committee posts over white supremacy comment"
Translation: "House GOP strips Steve King of committee posts over white supremacy comment; still in love with white supremacist president, Donald Trump, because consistency"
#SteveKing
41 Likes, 10 Retweets
56) It's unthinkable that the modern-day GOP can roundly criticize powerful women for what they deem as socially vulgar language yet can dismiss Trump's description of sexually assaulting women as "locker-room talk."
#TrumpUnthinkable
39 Likes, 11 Retweets
57) What's wrong with this country is the ubiquitous denial of our nation's shortcomings, and instead of attempting to fix said problems, blindly parading around that our country is the greatest in history. (Pt. 4)
#CovingtonCatholic
40 Likes, 9 Retweets
58) What's wrong with this country is people ignoring/disputing history, science, and fact-checks because what they see is not what they want to believe. (Pt. 6)
#CovingtonCatholic
39 Likes, 8 Retweets
59) Adderall in the Family
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
35 Likes, 11 Retweets
60) "Donald Trump Scores Higher Than 70 On An IQ Test"
#UnlikelyBreakingNews
37 Likes, 5 Retweets
61) Trump: "It's unthinkable people think I'm racist. I don't do races, but don't care if others do. Too much running. So what if I don't like black and brown people? They can race too. I don't care. Don't care. Not racist."
#TrumpUnthinkable #Snark
35 Likes, 5 Retweets
61) I'm disappointed in last night's "Daily Show" segment on #CovingtonCatholic. Trevor Noah seemed to only believe and report the students' perspective, ignore veteran Nathan Phillips' claims, and take the easy road out in suggesting, "There are bad people on all sides."
35 Likes, 5 Retweets
63) Deal-master Trump channeling his inner-Queen: "I want a wall! I want a wall! I want a wall! And I want it now!"
#DidTrumpOpenGovernmentYet #Snark
29 Likes, 10 Retweets
63) Really, MSNBC? You're bringing a fact-checker on with just 15 minutes left in the show? I guess you're intent on providing the CliffsNotes version of events, eh?
#TrumpSpeech
37 Likes, 2 Retweets
65) #MarchForLife should really be called #MarchForLifeUntilBirth.
30 Likes, 7 Retweets
65) The next shutdown argument
Trump: "I'm against drugs. Drugs are bad, mmkay? Democrats just want rehab for cokeheads. I want to cut off their noses. I'm not going to open the government back up until Dems are against drugs & want to cut off their noses too."
#TrumpShutdown #Snark
31 Likes, 6 Retweets
67) Trump's Politifact Scorecard
Total Grades: 638
Mostly True/True: 101 (15.8%)
Mostly False/False/Pants on Fire: 444 (70.0%)
Net: -54.2%
https://www.politifact.com/personalities/donald-trump/ …
#BoycottTrumpPrimeTime
23 Likes, 13 Retweets
68) Married Thrice With Children You Want to Bang
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
26 Likes, 8 Retweets
69) "Vice President Pence Calls His Wife, Mother, Sister"
#UnlikelyBreakingNews
28 Likes, 5 Retweets
70) #ImpeachTrump because a man-baby should be closely supervised at a nursery, not the Oval Office.
25 Likes, 7 Retweets
70) #SOTU speech prediction
Trump: "On day 38 of the government shutdown, the state of the union has never been stronger. Defeating ISIS and them coming back. Lots of workers without jobs. The invisible wall looking great. Hamberders for everyone. Never been stronger, folks."
#Snark
27 Likes, 5 Retweets
72) MLK's "I Have a Dream" speech according to Mike Pence
"I have a dream that one day in Arizona, little Hispanic boys and Hispanic girls will be blocked from joining hands with little white boys and white girls by a big beautiful wall."
#MLKDay #Snark
26 Likes, 5 Retweets
72) #ImpeachTrump because, admit it, you've always wanted to tell The Donald, "You're fired." I know I have, "bigly."
29 Likes, 2 Retweets
74) "Donald Trump Invests In 'The Church Of Two Corinthians'"
#UnlikelyBreakingNews
23 Likes, 6 Retweets
74) What's wrong with this country is the faux patriotism exhibited by so many rhetorically while contradicting this country's ideals behaviorally. (Pt. 7)
#CovingtonCatholic
26 Likes, 3 Retweets
76) Rand Paul
5/11/11: "If you believe in a right to healthcare, you're basically saying you believe in slavery."
1/14/19: "I guess I believe in slavery."
https://www.politifact.com/punditfact/statements/2015/may/27/sarah-silverman/did-rand-paul-equate-right-health-care-slavery/ …
#RandPaul #Snark
21 Likes, 7 Retweets
76) Giuliani once suggested that "truth isn't truth." Now he's basically stating "collusion isn't collusion." It seems all but inevitable, after he married such an individual, he said, "cousins aren't cousins."
#Giuliani
26 Likes, 2 Retweets
76) What's wrong with this country is the "I-built-that" mentality, showing ignorance and disrespect to all those who helped provide a person with that very opportunity. (Pt. 9)
#CovingtonCatholic
26 Likes, 2 Retweets
79) Drunks Know History Better Than Trump
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
23 Likes, 4 Retweets
80) BREAKING NEWS: "Senator Rand Paul will officially change his name to Universal so he can make sense in saying he both supports and decries Universal Healthcare"
#RandPaul #Snark
23 Likes, 3 Retweets
81) "Trump Supporters Take Responsibility For Something"
#UnlikelyBreakingNews
18 Likes, 4 Retweets
82) What's wrong with this country is the seemingly constant double-standards we place upon people (both legally and personally) dependent upon their age, race, gender, creed, and orientation. (Pt. 5)
#CovingtonCatholic
16 Likes, 4 Retweets
83) Spin Sh*tty
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
12 Likes, 4 Retweets
83) The King of Covfefes
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
14 Likes, 2 Retweets
83) 3rd Rock in His Skull
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
16 Likes, 0 Retweets
86) The Golden Showers
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
12 Likes, 3 Retweets
87) Orange-ish
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
11 Likes, 3 Retweets
88) The 10-Second Bang Theory
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
11 Likes, 1 Retweet
89) Putin's the Boss
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
10 Likes, 1 Retweet
89) The Multiple Family Guy
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
10 Likes, 1 Retweet
89) Fiends
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
10 Likes, 1 Retweet
92) The Crazy Bunch
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
7 Likes, 3 Retweets
92) Everybody Loves Hatin'
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
9 Likes, 1 Retweet
92) Apprentice the Menace
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
9 Likes, 1 Retweet
92) Family Matters (Except Tiffany and Eric)
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
10 Likes, 0 Retweets
92) Be Best Witch
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
10 Likes, 0 Retweets
97) I Love Lucifer
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
9 Likes, 0 Retweets
98) The Cosby Show: Orange Man Edition
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
5 Likes, 3 Retweets
98) Sh*t the Dotard Says
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
7 Likes, 1 Retweet
100) The No Heart Show
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
4 Likes, 3 Retweets
101) Fool's House
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
5 Likes, 1 Retweet
101) Night Tweet
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
6 Likes, 0 Retweets
101) Family Ties (From Jiiina)
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
6 Likes, 0 Retweets
101) Fresh On the Boat: A Hurricane Survival Story
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
6 Likes, 0 Retweets
105) Looney Dudes
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
5 Likes, 0 Retweets
106) The Obese Rascals
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
2 Likes, 0 Retweets
Totals: 10,845 Likes, 3,555 Retweets (Averages of 102.3 Likes, 33.5 Retweets)
1) Dear Trumpsters:
Let me get this straight; it's unacceptable to kneel during the anthem to protest police brutality/racial oppression, as it's disrespectful to veterans, yet it's perfectly acceptable to mock, insult, & harass a Native American veteran to his face? Gotcha...
#MAGA
1,930 Likes, 886 Retweets
2) Trump: "Build a wall. Terrorists. Drugs. Rapists. Blah blah blah. Yada yada yada. Wah! Whatever. Where's my f*ckin' Adderall?"
Schumer and Pelosi: "Whatever he said, it's bullsh*t. Thank you. God bless America."
#TrumpSpeech #DemocraticResponse #Snark
1,042 Likes, 298 Retweets
3) When whites misbehave/commit a crime
GOP: "They're just kids. Boys will be boys. It's locker-room talk. He's a lone wolf."
When non-whites commit the same acts
GOP: "They're thugs. No excuse. They need to be punished. This is part of a larger problem."
#CovingtonCatholic
592 Likes, 236 Retweets
4) It's unthinkable that a guy can lie 70% of the time, cheat on three wives, be accused by 20+ women of sexual impropriety, be a draft dodger, be a grifter, be in bed with Russia, yet still be lauded as a patriotic Christian by his base.
#TrumpUnthinkable
547 Likes, 218 Retweets
5) Sadly, it appears as though Donald Trump has been a role model to many children, as the kids who mocked and harassed Nathan Phillips illustrated. Even in the face of video evidence, they deny, distort, don't take responsibility, and play the victim card.
#CovingtonCatholic
403 Likes, 142 Retweets
6) It's unthinkable that a guy receives $400M+ from his dad, goes bankrupt 6 times, consistently cheats his workers and country, is discovered to be a fraud, is perhaps the world's worst negotiator, yet his base sees him as a genius businessman.
#TrumpUnthinkable
357 Likes, 123 Retweets
7) Trump: "If I give you a lil' sumthin' sumthin', you have to give me a big beautiful steel concrete plastic styrofoam rubber invisible blow-up doll wall. Capisce?"
#DidTrumpOpenGovernmentYet #Snark
366 Likes, 97 Retweets
8) Senator Kennedy (R-LA): "Are you Roman Catholic? Do you think that should disqualify you from this position? Can Bob Mueller take care of himself? Is he a big boy? Have you ever seen a wall? Does 'wall' rhyme with 'ball'? Do you like the breadsticks at Olive Garden?"
#Barr #Snark
320 Likes, 80 Retweets
9) What a Trumpster just told me: "The Native approached the kids, not the other way around!"
You heard it here first: According to Trumpsters, if a veteran approaches you, it's your duty to mock and harass him/her. Such patriotic little schlubs, they are...
#CovingtonCatholic
290 Likes, 92 Retweets
10) Trump: "We need to build a wall :: sniff sniff :: because of all the drugs that are coming :: sniff :: in :: sniff ::. So many drugs, so little time :: sniff sniff sniff ::. I am so against these drugs :: sniff sniff ::. Like, bigly :: sniff ::."
#BoycottTrumpPrimeTime #Snark
261 Likes, 101 Retweets
11) Trump: "We need a wall! National emergency!"
1955-2018 (64 years): 33,282 illegal immigrants were arrested for homicide (not necessarily convicted)
1999-2017 (19 years): 589,527 were killed by guns
64-year pace: 2,096,128
How about passing gun laws instead?
#TrumpShutdown
212 Likes, 102 Retweets
12) Trump: "Give me a wall and I'll give you something like really nice."
What Dems' response should be: "Take your wall and shove it. We don't negotiate with terrorists."
#DidTrumpOpenGovernmentYet
204 Likes, 61 Retweets
13) Trump: "I'm the best negotiator in history. I want a wall."
Dems: "No!"
Trump: "Give me a wall."
Dems: "Never!"
Trump: "How about now?"
Dems: "No chance"
Trump: "The best negotiator, folks, believe me."
#DidTrumpOpenGovernmentYet
#Snark
187 Likes, 57 Retweets
14) #LaraTrump: "Sure, federal workers going a month without pay is a bit of a pain, but a wall is so much bigger than any one person."
Translation: "Not having food is a bit of a pain, but keeping Mexicans out of this country is more important than any starving child."
162 Likes, 70 Retweets
15) Trumpsters: "I was merely trying to calm the situation, because nothing calms a situation like getting into a stare-down while blocking someone's path."
#CovingtonCatholic #Snark
145 Likes, 44 Retweets
16) Trump: "I've made billions while not working a day in my life because of a rich daddy, so I relate to all of you. Drugs are coming in, which is very bad. I love Adderall. I owned this shutdown, but it's the Democrats' fault. :: sniff :: The end :: sniff ::."
#TrumpAddress #Snark
145 Likes, 38 Retweets
17) Vietnam veteran Nathan Phillips: "These white kids attacked some African-Americans; threw beer cans at me; and said some really nasty, racist things."
Trumpsters: "I think the media owes these white kids an apology."
This is the Dick Cheney shooting all over again...
#MAGA
127 Likes, 40 Retweets
18) Dear Trumpsters:
Please stop sending me edited YouTube videos of the #CovingtonCatholic interaction. YouTube is about as reliable a source for news as admitting one has herpes on a first date is a guarantee for a second one.
119 Likes, 22 Retweets
19) Then
GOPers: "What's wrong with the kids today?!? They need to learn how to respect authority!"
Now
GOPers: "Disrespecting a Vietnam vet? Now that's more like it! These kids are all right."
#CovingtonCatholic
106 Likes, 33 Retweets
20) Arrests in Development
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
120 Likes, 12 Retweets
21) What a Trumpster just told me: "Black nationalists call white kids names. Natives tell them to go back to Europe. Whites wear hats & smile. The whites are the bad ones. This is the American left."
No, this is what happens when you move to never-never land...
#CovingtonCatholic
102 Likes, 28 Retweets
22) Dear Trumpsters:
If you think those reporting and calling out your misbehavior are stupid, perhaps you should stop saying and doing stupid things. Just a thought. You're welcome.
#CovingtonCatholic
106 Likes, 23 Retweets
23) Pence: "I'm deeply offended by people criticizing my wife for working at a school which regularly practices discrimination. When my boss brags about sexually assaulting women, however, I'm not at all offended, because I'm all about consistency, logic, & Jesus."
#KarenPence #Snark
87 Likes, 37 Retweets
24) Out of the blue, one man punches another man in the face.
GOP: "You know, if that second man weren't there and wasn't in the way of the other man's fist, this never would have happened. So both are at fault."
#TrumpShutdown
94 Likes, 24 Retweets
25) President Deal-Maker
Trump: "I want a wall."
"No"
"I said I want a wall!"
"No!"
"Dammit, give me a wall!"
"No!"
"Alright, fine! I'm out of here!"
#TheArtOfADeal #TrumpShutdown #Snark
89 Likes, 28 Retweets
26) What do you do when white kids mock, insult, harass, and attack a Native American Vietnam vet?"
Trumpsters: "Blame the blacks!"
#CovingtonCatholicHighSchool
88 Likes, 28 Retweets
27) Headline: "Right-wing activist Laura Loomer jumps fence and trespasses onto Nancy Pelosi's property"
Build a wall! Keep her out! She's a danger to our yards! Oh, wait, she just unintentionally proved walls/fences don't work. Nicely done!
#LauraLoomer #TrumpShutown
84 Likes, 25 Retweets
28) Then
Trump: "The polls are rigged. Election is rigged."
Now
You were actually right and it was you doing the rigging.
#MichaelCohen
72 Likes, 29 Retweets
29) Trump: "A wall will help greatly reduce the drug problem in this country, so we should build a wall. Stronger gun laws will greatly reduce gun violence, so we shouldn't pass more gun laws, because logic, bigly."
#DidTrumpOpenGovernmentYet #Snark
71 Likes, 29 Retweets
30) Trump: "I'm going to distract the American people of all the bad things that happened surrounding me today by giving the most boring speech in history - a speech so boring, it'll make Ben Stein sound like a coked-up motivational speaker."
#TrumpAddress #Snark
84 Likes, 15 Retweets
31) What's wrong with our country is millions of people can't get over a war that ended over 150 years ago and the changes that came with it. (Pt. 2)
#CovingtonCatholic
75 Likes, 23 Retweets
32) Trump: "Its unthinkable that I speak at a 3rd grade levill, can't reed telepromters, have the best werds, taught the world about covfefe, and people still think I'm like stoopid or sumthing. Fake news!"
#TrumpUnthinkable #Snark
77 Likes, 18 Retweets
33) I really think Weird Al should parody Trump courtesy of Pink Floyd in the song, "Another Dick For a Wall."
#BoycottTrumpPrimeTime
75 Likes, 12 Retweets
34) National Emergency Countdown (15 minutes):
Donald Trump is about to give a speech which includes nothing but rambling-alternative-fact-fake-news-misinformed-3rd-grade-level-gibberish gobbledygook. In other words, it'll be just like any other time he speaks.
#BoycottTrumpPrimeTime
56 Likes, 23 Retweets
34) Ben Shapiro: "The truth is no pro-life person would kill baby Hitler. Baby Hitler was a baby."
Yes, because nothing says "pro-life" like sparing one baby's life at the expense of over 6 million others.
https://encyclopedia.ushmm.org/content/en/article/documenting-numbers-of-victims-of-the-holocaust-and-nazi-persecution …
#BabyHitler
57 Likes, 22 Retweets
36) Trump: "It's winter. Winter is cold. Cold brings snow. So much for global warming."
What an idiot. I'm guessing he learned that logic at Trump University...
#Snowstorm
63 Likes, 15 Retweets
36) I was told by a Trumpster that our criticism of the kids harassing the Vietnam vet/our defense of said vet are what's wrong with the country, our hate. No, that's asinine to the point of insane it's so ridiculous. Here's what's wrong with our country... (pt. 1)
#CovingtonCatholic
65 Likes, 13 Retweets
38) I wonder when Nathan Phillips, whose people had their land taken from them by whites yet still fought for the country he loved in war, suggested we build a wall. Oh, that's right, he didn't.
#CovingtonCatholic #BuildBridgesNotWalls #EndTheShutdown
62 Likes, 15 Retweets
39) Dear Trumpsters:
You can't edit history, post the revision on YouTube, and claim your portrayal is what really happened. Try doing that after a girlfriend catches you cheating on her. Unless her name is Sarah Huckabee-Sanders, she's not going to buy it.
#MAGA
56 Likes, 20 Retweets
39) Dear Dotard-in-Chief:
Remember that song you often played at the end of rallies? Perhaps you should listen a little more closely to the lyrics & think about applying them to yourself & the wall. What was that, Mick? "You can't always get what you want."
#DidTrumpOpenGovernmentYet
62 Likes, 14 Retweets
41) Dear GOP:
Some words of advice: If you want your faux outrage regarding Steve King's racism to come across as even halfway genuine, stop blindly supporting the Racist-In-Chief, Donald Trump.
#SteveKing #RepKing
51 Likes, 23 Retweets
42) Just imagine if a white anti-gun control Vietnam veteran was singing a "patriotic" song while in the midst of a diverse group of kids at a March For Our Lives rally & was mocked by said kids. What would the right's reaction be? Starkly different than it is now.
#CovingtonCatholic
62 Likes, 10 Retweets
43) Trump: "I already shut down the government to distract from the Mueller probe. That new Buzzfeed article screwed up that strategery. Wait, I'm gonna shut down the government even harder now! How? I don't know, but it'll be the best, biggest shutdown ever!"
#Buzzfeed #Snark
57 Likes, 13 Retweets
44) What's wrong with this country is that money is often times seen of greater value than humanity. (Pt. 10)
#CovingtonCatholic
50 Likes, 16 Retweets
45) BREAKING NEWS: "I just found Mitch!"
#WhereIsMitch
51 Likes, 13 Retweets
46) Trump: "It's unthinkable that I built a big, beautiful, invisible wall along our druggie-rapist border and don't get any credit for it, even as I snort Adderall on live television while telling everyone about it. So not fair!"
#TrumpUnthinkable #Snark
51 Likes, 9 Retweets
47) #ImpeachTrump, because a wall will soon be built around him, where he'll be provided clothing which match his spray tan.
41 Likes, 18 Retweets
48) Comparing Barr/Kavanaugh if Barr were asked the same questions as Kavanaugh
Kavanaugh: "I like beer! Beer! Did you hear me?!? BEER! Let's boof!"
Barr: "Do I like beer? I don't know. I'll have to get back to you on that. Oh, and I haven't heard 'boof' in 30 years."
#Barr #Snark
50 Likes, 8 Retweets
49) They're showing highlights (lowlights) of the speech on MSNBC. Holy boring! Forget Melatonin and Ambien. Just listen to five seconds of this dull, unenergetic, monotone speech and you'll be out!
#TrumpAddress
50 Likes, 5 Retweets
50) Instead of displaying "Support Our Troops!" bumper stickers on their cars, perhaps Trumpsters should display a bumper sticker which reads, "Support Our Troops! ...unless a Native American vet gets harassed by some white kids wearing MAGA hats."
#CovingtonCatholicSchool
40 Likes, 14 Retweets
51) Giuliani: "Trump ran the greatest campaign in history. Now, he didn't collude with Russia, but his campaign might have, for he had nothing to do with his campaign."
#Giuliani #Snark
42 Likes, 10 Retweets
51) What's wrong with our country is the sense of superiority rich straight white Christian men have always felt, who mistake privilege with equality. (Pt. 3)
#CovingtonCatholic
42 Likes, 10 Retweets
51) What's wrong with this country is the cherry-picking of scripture to support one's agenda, brainwashing millions through this, and instilling hate and anger as a result. (Pt. 8)
#CovingtonCatholic
42 Likes, 10 Retweets
54) #ImpeachTrump because he once tweeted about "peach on earth" and there's no better way to bring "peach on earth" than impeaching the Dotard-in-Chief.
36 Likes, 15 Retweets
54) Headline: "House GOP strips Steve King of committee posts over white supremacy comment"
Translation: "House GOP strips Steve King of committee posts over white supremacy comment; still in love with white supremacist president, Donald Trump, because consistency"
#SteveKing
41 Likes, 10 Retweets
56) It's unthinkable that the modern-day GOP can roundly criticize powerful women for what they deem as socially vulgar language yet can dismiss Trump's description of sexually assaulting women as "locker-room talk."
#TrumpUnthinkable
39 Likes, 11 Retweets
57) What's wrong with this country is the ubiquitous denial of our nation's shortcomings, and instead of attempting to fix said problems, blindly parading around that our country is the greatest in history. (Pt. 4)
#CovingtonCatholic
40 Likes, 9 Retweets
58) What's wrong with this country is people ignoring/disputing history, science, and fact-checks because what they see is not what they want to believe. (Pt. 6)
#CovingtonCatholic
39 Likes, 8 Retweets
59) Adderall in the Family
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
35 Likes, 11 Retweets
60) "Donald Trump Scores Higher Than 70 On An IQ Test"
#UnlikelyBreakingNews
37 Likes, 5 Retweets
61) Trump: "It's unthinkable people think I'm racist. I don't do races, but don't care if others do. Too much running. So what if I don't like black and brown people? They can race too. I don't care. Don't care. Not racist."
#TrumpUnthinkable #Snark
35 Likes, 5 Retweets
61) I'm disappointed in last night's "Daily Show" segment on #CovingtonCatholic. Trevor Noah seemed to only believe and report the students' perspective, ignore veteran Nathan Phillips' claims, and take the easy road out in suggesting, "There are bad people on all sides."
35 Likes, 5 Retweets
63) Deal-master Trump channeling his inner-Queen: "I want a wall! I want a wall! I want a wall! And I want it now!"
#DidTrumpOpenGovernmentYet #Snark
29 Likes, 10 Retweets
63) Really, MSNBC? You're bringing a fact-checker on with just 15 minutes left in the show? I guess you're intent on providing the CliffsNotes version of events, eh?
#TrumpSpeech
37 Likes, 2 Retweets
65) #MarchForLife should really be called #MarchForLifeUntilBirth.
30 Likes, 7 Retweets
65) The next shutdown argument
Trump: "I'm against drugs. Drugs are bad, mmkay? Democrats just want rehab for cokeheads. I want to cut off their noses. I'm not going to open the government back up until Dems are against drugs & want to cut off their noses too."
#TrumpShutdown #Snark
31 Likes, 6 Retweets
67) Trump's Politifact Scorecard
Total Grades: 638
Mostly True/True: 101 (15.8%)
Mostly False/False/Pants on Fire: 444 (70.0%)
Net: -54.2%
https://www.politifact.com/personalities/donald-trump/ …
#BoycottTrumpPrimeTime
23 Likes, 13 Retweets
68) Married Thrice With Children You Want to Bang
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
26 Likes, 8 Retweets
69) "Vice President Pence Calls His Wife, Mother, Sister"
#UnlikelyBreakingNews
28 Likes, 5 Retweets
70) #ImpeachTrump because a man-baby should be closely supervised at a nursery, not the Oval Office.
25 Likes, 7 Retweets
70) #SOTU speech prediction
Trump: "On day 38 of the government shutdown, the state of the union has never been stronger. Defeating ISIS and them coming back. Lots of workers without jobs. The invisible wall looking great. Hamberders for everyone. Never been stronger, folks."
#Snark
27 Likes, 5 Retweets
72) MLK's "I Have a Dream" speech according to Mike Pence
"I have a dream that one day in Arizona, little Hispanic boys and Hispanic girls will be blocked from joining hands with little white boys and white girls by a big beautiful wall."
#MLKDay #Snark
26 Likes, 5 Retweets
72) #ImpeachTrump because, admit it, you've always wanted to tell The Donald, "You're fired." I know I have, "bigly."
29 Likes, 2 Retweets
74) "Donald Trump Invests In 'The Church Of Two Corinthians'"
#UnlikelyBreakingNews
23 Likes, 6 Retweets
74) What's wrong with this country is the faux patriotism exhibited by so many rhetorically while contradicting this country's ideals behaviorally. (Pt. 7)
#CovingtonCatholic
26 Likes, 3 Retweets
76) Rand Paul
5/11/11: "If you believe in a right to healthcare, you're basically saying you believe in slavery."
1/14/19: "I guess I believe in slavery."
https://www.politifact.com/punditfact/statements/2015/may/27/sarah-silverman/did-rand-paul-equate-right-health-care-slavery/ …
#RandPaul #Snark
21 Likes, 7 Retweets
76) Giuliani once suggested that "truth isn't truth." Now he's basically stating "collusion isn't collusion." It seems all but inevitable, after he married such an individual, he said, "cousins aren't cousins."
#Giuliani
26 Likes, 2 Retweets
76) What's wrong with this country is the "I-built-that" mentality, showing ignorance and disrespect to all those who helped provide a person with that very opportunity. (Pt. 9)
#CovingtonCatholic
26 Likes, 2 Retweets
79) Drunks Know History Better Than Trump
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
23 Likes, 4 Retweets
80) BREAKING NEWS: "Senator Rand Paul will officially change his name to Universal so he can make sense in saying he both supports and decries Universal Healthcare"
#RandPaul #Snark
23 Likes, 3 Retweets
81) "Trump Supporters Take Responsibility For Something"
#UnlikelyBreakingNews
18 Likes, 4 Retweets
82) What's wrong with this country is the seemingly constant double-standards we place upon people (both legally and personally) dependent upon their age, race, gender, creed, and orientation. (Pt. 5)
#CovingtonCatholic
16 Likes, 4 Retweets
83) Spin Sh*tty
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
12 Likes, 4 Retweets
83) The King of Covfefes
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
14 Likes, 2 Retweets
83) 3rd Rock in His Skull
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
16 Likes, 0 Retweets
86) The Golden Showers
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
12 Likes, 3 Retweets
87) Orange-ish
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
11 Likes, 3 Retweets
88) The 10-Second Bang Theory
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
11 Likes, 1 Retweet
89) Putin's the Boss
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
10 Likes, 1 Retweet
89) The Multiple Family Guy
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
10 Likes, 1 Retweet
89) Fiends
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
10 Likes, 1 Retweet
92) The Crazy Bunch
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
7 Likes, 3 Retweets
92) Everybody Loves Hatin'
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
9 Likes, 1 Retweet
92) Apprentice the Menace
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
9 Likes, 1 Retweet
92) Family Matters (Except Tiffany and Eric)
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
10 Likes, 0 Retweets
92) Be Best Witch
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
10 Likes, 0 Retweets
97) I Love Lucifer
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
9 Likes, 0 Retweets
98) The Cosby Show: Orange Man Edition
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
5 Likes, 3 Retweets
98) Sh*t the Dotard Says
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
7 Likes, 1 Retweet
100) The No Heart Show
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
4 Likes, 3 Retweets
101) Fool's House
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
5 Likes, 1 Retweet
101) Night Tweet
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
6 Likes, 0 Retweets
101) Family Ties (From Jiiina)
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
6 Likes, 0 Retweets
101) Fresh On the Boat: A Hurricane Survival Story
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
6 Likes, 0 Retweets
105) Looney Dudes
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
5 Likes, 0 Retweets
106) The Obese Rascals
#WhiteHouseSitcoms
2 Likes, 0 Retweets
Totals: 10,845 Likes, 3,555 Retweets (Averages of 102.3 Likes, 33.5 Retweets)
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