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What I learned in Week 10 of the NFL season

In Week 10 of the NFL season, I learned that...

- ...the New York Jets are the crazy uncle Tommy of the NFL, for they look best when they're not present.

- ..., when Bill Belichick is handed a shit sandwich, he turns it into two dozen roses.

- ...Lamar Jackson can throw the football about as far as Danny DeVito can throw Arnold Schwarzenegger.

- ...Nick Chubb is a smart man's Todd Gurley.

- ..., even though Drew Brees has cracked ribs, a collapsed lung, a torn heart, and a pair of missing hands, Sean Payton is still thinking about starting him over Jameis Winston.

- ..., when at confession last week, Bills and Cardinals fans didn't realize until Sunday that the hail marys were to be taken literally.

- ...the fade pass is about as useless as a Democrat voting in Wyoming.

- ..., at Thanksgiving dinner, deaf football fans will say, "We're truly grateful for not having to listen to Matt Millen's announcing on Sundays. Amen."

- ...Russell Wilson is celebrating Christmas early this year, as for the past couple weeks, he's been handing unsuspecting recipients free balls inside the red zone.

- ..., the NFC East is so bad, the nickname of the "Redskins" would be the least offensive thing about it this year.

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