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Mad Libs featuring Sarah Palin

Did you hear Sarah Palin's seemingly drunken endorsement speech for Donald Trump the other day? Were you also left speechless, pondering to yourself, "What in the hell did she just say? I thought she was all about English being this country's national language..."? If that was the case, and like me, you immediately reached for some pain-killers five seconds into Palin's lecture on word salad, click on the following link to have a little fun with her speech via a Mad Lib:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/sarah-palin-donald-trump_us_569fbb79e4b0a7026bf9cd33

Here's how my first attempt at a Sarah Palin Mad Lib worked out:

"Thank you so much. It's so great to be here in outhouse (place). We're here just thawing out. Todd and I and a couple of our bifocals (plural noun) here from crackhouse (place), lending out support for the next president of Hooters (place), Donald J. Trump. Are you ready to make Drive-inn theater (place) great again? We all have a part in this. We all have a responsibility. Looking around at all of you; you loony (adjective) Iowa condoms (plural noun), you Busch Light cans (plural noun) and all-you-can-eat buffets (plural noun) and teamsters and cops and cooks; you rockin' rollers and holy rollers! All of you who work so hard, you full-time moms, you with the hands that fornicates (present-tense verb) the cradle. You all make the world go round and now our cause is one. Things are gonna change under Humpty Dumpty (name). So, it can be an unbeatable team with fighters there in the House and the Senate. Yeah, our leader is a little bit different. He's a toothpick (singular noun). Not that there's anything wrong with that. But, it's amazing, he is not moronic (adjective) at all. Oh, I just hope you all get to know him more and more as a person and a eyepatch (singular noun). Iowa, you say a lot being here tonight, supporting the right man who will allow you to make America inebriated (adjective) again. God bless you! God bless cave (place) and our next president of the United States, The Dude (name)!"

Sadly, that may have made slightly more sense than Palin's actual speech...
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