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Trump breaks the world record for signed blank pieces of paper

In what he's hailing as his signature achievement, President Donald Trump just broke the world record for signing the most blank pieces of paper in one sitting.

To celebrate his accomplishment, while standing under a "Mission Accomplished Big League" banner, Donald Trump relayed the following message:

"My fellow Americans, what I did today was kind of a big deal. I can't describe just how big it is. Did you ever catch a big, like a really big fish? This is even bigger than that, believe me! I just broke a world record today, which means I did something more than anyone else did something, so that's something right there! This just goes to show all the doubters out there that, when I put my mind to something, I can accomplish anything! I was in the zone today, folks. Just one blank piece of paper after another, and boom, boom, boom, signed, done. My hand has never been that busy before, and it's been pretty busy. Just ask Access Hollywood. Anyway, this is just the start. My name on blank pieces of paper is how we make America great again!"

In response to this speech, Dictionary.com has added a picture of Trump next to the term blank.

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