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Anti-vaxxers are now anti-toothpaste

Anti-vaxxers, or the community against vaccinations, are apparently about to start fighting for another cause, as anti-vaxxer Elizabeth Insanity told the world of YouTube, or YouTubers, yesterday via a short video clip.

In the video, Ms. Insanity said this:

"I think it's safe to say that, given the measles outbreak and everything, we are winning the fight against pro-vaxxers and their evil vaccinations! Now it's time for us to further spread our wisdom! What's the one thing we all know to be more dangerous than vaccinations? Toothpaste! I read a blog one time by an author named Satire, who wrote just one sourceless sentence, but that was solid enough proof for me, as it should be for everyone! He wrote, and I quote, 'Toothpaste causes intellectual disability.' At first I was like, 'What? Who does this Satire guy really think he is?' But then I got to thinking about what he said and it just makes sense! When you're brushing your teeth or afterwards when you're still rinsing toothpaste out of your mouth, have you ever noticed that when you try talking to someone, you sound kind of stupid? That's because Mr. Satire is right; toothpaste causes intellectual disability! So I say let's go ahead with this, march forward and win the fight against toothpaste like we've done against vaccinations! Onward, my now fellow anti-toothsters!"

When I later caught up with Ms. Insanity, I asked her how she felt not brushing her teeth would affect her love life. She responded with, "Oh, I don't care; I'm asexual anyway." When I then asked her if she felt anything in particular had caused her to be asexual, she said, "Yeah, shampoo."

After being polled about this movement, it's safe to say that 5 out of 5 dentists disagree with the anti-toothsters.
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