Since I've found the Tim Tebow-hype to be so ridiculous, especially via ESPN, I thought I'd come up with a dialogue between ESPN and God, regarding who else but Tim Tebow.
God: "What do you come here for?"
ESPN: "To talk about Tim Tebow, sir."
God: "Okay. Go ahead."
ESPN: "Is it true that he's your son?"
God: "You're all my children. Although, I admit that I do like some of you more than others."
ESPN: "...and Tebow?"
God: "He's a fine young man with a good heart."
ESPN: "Is it true that you intervened in all of those comebacks the Broncos had this year?"
God: "No, what do you think I am?"
ESPN: "God... ...but what about the 316 yards he threw for against the Steelers in the playoffs? His favorite passage is John 3:16. That can't be a coincidence."
God: "What about the 60 yards he threw for against the Chiefs, completing just 6 of 22 passes? There was nothing godly about that. Ray Charles could throw better and he and I just played the piano together a couple days ago."
ESPN: "Well, is he the chosen one of the NFL?"
God: "Chosen? Chosen by who? Carrot Top?"
ESPN: "You."
God: "If he's the chosen one of the NFL, I must not be very bright. If that were the case, you might as well call me Forrest Gump."
ESPN: "Mr. Gump..."
God: "Very funny. I was kidding. No, he's not the chosen one. That would be Neo. Haven't you seen 'The Matrix'?"
ESPN: "No actually. I..."
God: "What planet are you from?"
ESPN: "I'll be sure to check that out..."
God: "You do that. There's the red pill and blue pill. I may have to add another for you - the crazy pill."
ESPN: "...okay...so what do you think about Tebowing?"
God: "That's funny. He and his like don't seem to care much for gays, but he sure enjoys being on his knees quite a bit, doesn't he?"
ESPN: "So, you have a problem with this?"
God: "I don't care. It's his decision. He just may want to cut down on that or people may start talking. Others may start getting excited...you know...Elton John, George Michael, Ricky Martin, this Craig kid in Ohio..."
ESPN: "Craig kid?"
God: "Yeah, he knows who I'm talking about. One word - flaming!"
ESPN: "So, will Tim Tebow have continued success?"
God: "Continued success? At what?"
ESPN: "Football, of course..."
God: "Since when did finishing last or near last in every passing category equal success for a NFL quarterback?"
ESPN: "But he wins games..."
God: "Are you questioning God?"
ESPN: "But, it's Tim Tebow..."
God: "Look, if he's going to have success at anything, it will either be in baseball or as a human windmill."
ESPN: "What?"
God: "With a windup like his, he could be a natural pitcher or he could help out with wind energy and be a human windmill. My bet is on the latter."
ESPN: "You're kidding..."
God: "No. I'm dead serious. Tim Tebow - human windmill. Mark it. It will happen on March 16th (3/16) of next year."
ESPN: "What about Tebowmania?"
God: "What about it?"
ESPN: "Do you feel it? I know we all do over at ESPN."
God: "Yeah, I know. You really need to stop it, as Mike Ditka would say."
ESPN: "What? Why?"
God: "Because it makes you look like you're permanently Tebowing right in front of Tebow himself, if you catch my drift..."
ESPN: "No. What do you mean?"
God: "Just keep at it and you'll find out for yourself, as will Tim ...and the likes of Elton John, George Michael, Ricky Martin and Craig are going to be very excited."
God: "What do you come here for?"
ESPN: "To talk about Tim Tebow, sir."
God: "Okay. Go ahead."
ESPN: "Is it true that he's your son?"
God: "You're all my children. Although, I admit that I do like some of you more than others."
ESPN: "...and Tebow?"
God: "He's a fine young man with a good heart."
ESPN: "Is it true that you intervened in all of those comebacks the Broncos had this year?"
God: "No, what do you think I am?"
ESPN: "God... ...but what about the 316 yards he threw for against the Steelers in the playoffs? His favorite passage is John 3:16. That can't be a coincidence."
God: "What about the 60 yards he threw for against the Chiefs, completing just 6 of 22 passes? There was nothing godly about that. Ray Charles could throw better and he and I just played the piano together a couple days ago."
ESPN: "Well, is he the chosen one of the NFL?"
God: "Chosen? Chosen by who? Carrot Top?"
ESPN: "You."
God: "If he's the chosen one of the NFL, I must not be very bright. If that were the case, you might as well call me Forrest Gump."
ESPN: "Mr. Gump..."
God: "Very funny. I was kidding. No, he's not the chosen one. That would be Neo. Haven't you seen 'The Matrix'?"
ESPN: "No actually. I..."
God: "What planet are you from?"
ESPN: "I'll be sure to check that out..."
God: "You do that. There's the red pill and blue pill. I may have to add another for you - the crazy pill."
ESPN: "...okay...so what do you think about Tebowing?"
God: "That's funny. He and his like don't seem to care much for gays, but he sure enjoys being on his knees quite a bit, doesn't he?"
ESPN: "So, you have a problem with this?"
God: "I don't care. It's his decision. He just may want to cut down on that or people may start talking. Others may start getting excited...you know...Elton John, George Michael, Ricky Martin, this Craig kid in Ohio..."
ESPN: "Craig kid?"
God: "Yeah, he knows who I'm talking about. One word - flaming!"
ESPN: "So, will Tim Tebow have continued success?"
God: "Continued success? At what?"
ESPN: "Football, of course..."
God: "Since when did finishing last or near last in every passing category equal success for a NFL quarterback?"
ESPN: "But he wins games..."
God: "Are you questioning God?"
ESPN: "But, it's Tim Tebow..."
God: "Look, if he's going to have success at anything, it will either be in baseball or as a human windmill."
ESPN: "What?"
God: "With a windup like his, he could be a natural pitcher or he could help out with wind energy and be a human windmill. My bet is on the latter."
ESPN: "You're kidding..."
God: "No. I'm dead serious. Tim Tebow - human windmill. Mark it. It will happen on March 16th (3/16) of next year."
ESPN: "What about Tebowmania?"
God: "What about it?"
ESPN: "Do you feel it? I know we all do over at ESPN."
God: "Yeah, I know. You really need to stop it, as Mike Ditka would say."
ESPN: "What? Why?"
God: "Because it makes you look like you're permanently Tebowing right in front of Tebow himself, if you catch my drift..."
ESPN: "No. What do you mean?"
God: "Just keep at it and you'll find out for yourself, as will Tim ...and the likes of Elton John, George Michael, Ricky Martin and Craig are going to be very excited."
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