Ever known someone who just didn't seem to like you from the start? You have no idea what you said or did to bother them, but they just have a certain attitude about them around you that they don't contain around others? I've run into this with someone. It kind of reached a peak last week, but looking back on things, I have to say it's been rolling in this direction for quite some time.
The crazy thing is, I don't see him act this way around anyone else. It is entirely possible that he does, but if so, I haven't been aware of it. He just likes to pick fights and sometimes over the silliest of things. He'll also make comments which signify a certain disapproval of me.
For most of 2009 and 2010 I was ill and due to my symptoms, was unable to drive. After I was able to walk a bit again, I was able to get a ride out to a pub on a Friday or Saturday during the weekends. It was nice. It kept me sane, as I was stuck inside the house for the week, unable to move much some days. It was quite gratifying to be out and socialize a bit.
However, on two occasions, when my ride came to pick me up and called to let me know they were there, I said, "I'm have about 3/4 left of this drink. Do you want to come in for a few until I finish?"
There was a 50/50 chance of this occurring. If they said no, I'd respond with, "Okay, I'll be out there as soon as I can."
As I have many friends who go to this same place, after I finished the drink, I'd say my goodbyes and this guy talked about how rude I was being. This was coming from a man who didn't really know the person picking me up, didn't really know me and didn't know my situation.
The person who picked me up knew of my situation, how I was basically trapped inside a house for close to a year straight (at that point), wasn't sure how serious my condition was and craved some form of social interaction. Due to this, they were very understanding of waiting an additional 5-10 minutes as I finished my drink and said my goodbyes.
I kept trying to play nice, without snapping at all, and saying, "It's fine. I talked to them...and they're fine with it. I won't take much longer."
I wanted to snap and say, "Eh, just out of curiosity, have you ever been stuck inside a house for about a year straight, unable to walk most days, feeling quite depressed due to it all and not knowing if it will ever improve or if it will require brain or spinal surgery? ...that there's a chance you could lose your legs? No, I didn't think so. ...so please, mind your own business. My ride understands my situation. They understand how depressed I am due to my condition. They know how much I crave social interaction and to feel like a real living person again. You don't, so shut it!" But, no, I held my ground and just tried to smile, like I always do.
When I got to know a guy from out of town and he told this before-mentioned individual, "I love this guy," the man who doesn't like me told him something negative about me. Once again, I laughed it off, as I always do.
I'm known to dress up for costume parties there and bring random things in to garner a few chuckles. So, a few of us were on the back patio and I don't remember what all was said, but again, this individual poked fun at me, saying something like, "...like someone who tries too hard to get laughs..." and looked at me. For the record, I think he's about the only one there who doesn't laugh at my costumes/jokes/etc.
There was a time when he tried arguing with me about former Florida head coach, Urban Meyer. I had heard from an inside source that it was very possible he'd be the next coach at Ohio State. He made it seem like a joke and guaranteed that was never going to happen. For the record, Urban Meyer is now the coach at Ohio State.
Yet another time, he got heated over a discussion about Carolina Panthers' rookie quarterback Cam Newton. All I said was that while he was off to a very good start, I'm not going to predict how quality of an NFL starter he's going to be in the long-term just yet, that I need more reps, more experience from the guy before I come to a conclusion. He acted furious, as he was dead certain Newton was going to be a great NFL quarterback for the long haul and was already one of the top 3-4 quarterbacks in the league.
He got heated. He was asking me who else in the league threw for as many yards as he did in the first couple games, who could throw the ball like him, etc. He put him right alongside Tom Brady and Drew Brees.
I said, "Yes, like I said, he's off to a very good start, but that's two games. That's a very small sample-size. If I had judged Troy Aikman or John Elway on their first couple games, I would have thought they'd be busts at quarterback as opposed to being Hall-of-Famers. Also, Carolina has been down most of the time, which requires the team to throw the ball more in an attempt to catch up to their opponent. Unless a quarterback is in a pass-dominated system, like Peyton Manning, Drew Brees or Tom Brady, the greater number of passing yards can often times mean the longer the team had to try and come back from a deficit."
He then finally settled on, "Well, you can't tell me that he has the tools to be a great quarterback."
To that, I agree. I never said the guy didn't have the talent, the skill set to be a long-term success in the NFL. I just said with the small sample-size of games played, of passes thrown, I wasn't going to decide on the guy one way or another at this point in time.
I also brought up the possibility of injury, especially for a guy like Newton who likes to run the ball some and with that, makes himself more susceptible to injury.
In response, this guy laughed and said, "So, you're going to bring up injury now?"
I laughed and said, "Eh, yeah. He is considered to be a dual-threat quarterback. Let's look at such quarterbacks in the past... Most of them suffered pretty serious injuries along the way, some of the career-ending variety. A quarterback can have one good season or even two good seasons. In order for me to consider a quarterback great, I have to see that high-level of play for multiple seasons. Newton isn't even at the halfway point of his rookie season. Let's wait a while before hailing him the next great quarterback."
Yeah, perhaps I'm biased, but I feel I was the more reasonable of the two. In any case, I tried to keep my cool and look at things from a broader perspective. I wasn't taking sides. I was trying to look at things from all points of view. Why he attempted to turn that into a heated debate is beyond me.
When I was propositioned by a married couple, whom had seemingly illustrated to me that they were happily married and trying to be "friends" of mine, this man sarcastically asked, "Well, what did you expect?"
Upon telling the story to others, this man said, "You love this don't you? All of the attention on you."
He then tried engaging in political discourse with me. We don't agree on much and based, in part, on the Cam Newton "discussion" and stories I've heard from others about him getting heated with regard to politics, I again tried to keep cool and look at things from a broader perspective, taking all viewpoints into account. This seemed to bother him.
When we talked about the Republican candidates, I brought up how it was likely that Mitt Romney would be the most difficult candidate for the Democrats to beat, as he has ties to the regularly blue states of Massachusetts and Michigan, Mormon ties in the battleground state of Colorado and due to his moderate past, could compete in blue states other Republican candidates could not. On the flip side, due to his faith, I could see some redder states being more fair play for Barack Obama as well. In the grand scheme of things, however, I thought the potential benefits outweighed the hindrances when it came to a Republican perspective of Mitt Romney and his chances of winning the 2012 presidential election. I brought up some other candidates and how they'd likely dominate the traditionally red states, especially in the southeast. However, it would be unlikely that they'd be able to compete in the blue states as Romney might. I wasn't illustrating bias. I wasn't trying to argue. I was just trying to be honest and to look at thing from a different perspective.
When we got into health care reform, I knew I was going to be in trouble. I brought up countries who have implemented universal health care, studies which showcase the level of contentment and well-being in those countries is typically far superior to those without such a health care system.
He brought up waiting lines and how many from Canada come to the U.S. for treatment, because they can't get that same treatment in their own country.
I said, "Well, yes, I have heard such stories, but have heard the direct opposite as well, of U.S. citizens going to Canada to get treatment."
He had never heard of such stories. By this point, I thought the conversation was rather pointless, because neither of us had any documentation to prove or disprove one's points.
He then asked if my personal health problems has an impact on my supporting universal health care reform, if that made me biased in favor of such a system.
I had to kind of laugh and thought to myself, "Eh, isn't it kind of inevitable for our own life experiences to effect our beliefs?" Of course, I didn't say that, but that's definitely what I was thinking.
There were a couple times he angrily spoke about Democrats, Obama in particular, but I bit my tongue and just nodded my head and smiled.
This past weekend, he was asking about why some Americans weren't pleased with Mitt Romney's tax returns. I attempted to answer the question, not from my own vantage point, but based on what he was asking - what people (in general) were upset about. So, I based my answer on conversations I've had, articles I've read, etc. He raised his voice and his wife had to explain that I wasn't supporting nor bashing these opinions. I was simply stating that's what these very Americans, whom he asked about, have been saying.
We then got into a discussion about "The Buffett Rule". Again, I tried not to take sides. I simply asked what was so awful about taxes on the upper 1-2% being increased from 35% to 39.6%, where they were during the Clinton years. He went off on some talking points-tangent.
I then said, "Well, you know taxes for the wealthy under Reagan was 50%, right?"
He angrily stated, "That's bulls**t."
I kind of laughed and said, "Okay then. Look it up."
He snapped, gave me his phone and told me to look it up.
Yeah, so I did. I googled "Reagan tax 50%" and came back with 3,700,000 results. I clicked on the first one and wouldn't you know it, for 5 of Reagan's 8 years in office, taxes for the wealthy was at 50.0% and for all 8 years, it averaged out to be right around there, 48.2%, I believe.
He responded with, "That's not true and you know it."
Again, I kind of laughed and said, "Okay. Click on the next link then."
This ended with him calling me a socialist and I'm not sure what else. At that point, I just said I was done and left.
He then sent some half-hearted apologies, which I am 99.834% certain were prompted by his wife.
So, what's the deal? I admit, he doesn't seem to smile or laugh often, so perhaps I'm taking this too personally. However, I haven't witnessed him getting after anyone like he has with me and seem so insistent on picking fights. I don't know what I did or said to cause this, but I wish it would stop, that he'd at least come forward to me, tell me what the problem is, if there is any, so I can hopefully help to solve that very problem. In any case, it's growing to be more uncomfortable for me to be around him. I can get along with pretty much anyone else in there, but for whatever reason, it seems to be a difficult task with him...and for the life of me, I can't figure out why.
The crazy thing is, I don't see him act this way around anyone else. It is entirely possible that he does, but if so, I haven't been aware of it. He just likes to pick fights and sometimes over the silliest of things. He'll also make comments which signify a certain disapproval of me.
For most of 2009 and 2010 I was ill and due to my symptoms, was unable to drive. After I was able to walk a bit again, I was able to get a ride out to a pub on a Friday or Saturday during the weekends. It was nice. It kept me sane, as I was stuck inside the house for the week, unable to move much some days. It was quite gratifying to be out and socialize a bit.
However, on two occasions, when my ride came to pick me up and called to let me know they were there, I said, "I'm have about 3/4 left of this drink. Do you want to come in for a few until I finish?"
There was a 50/50 chance of this occurring. If they said no, I'd respond with, "Okay, I'll be out there as soon as I can."
As I have many friends who go to this same place, after I finished the drink, I'd say my goodbyes and this guy talked about how rude I was being. This was coming from a man who didn't really know the person picking me up, didn't really know me and didn't know my situation.
The person who picked me up knew of my situation, how I was basically trapped inside a house for close to a year straight (at that point), wasn't sure how serious my condition was and craved some form of social interaction. Due to this, they were very understanding of waiting an additional 5-10 minutes as I finished my drink and said my goodbyes.
I kept trying to play nice, without snapping at all, and saying, "It's fine. I talked to them...and they're fine with it. I won't take much longer."
I wanted to snap and say, "Eh, just out of curiosity, have you ever been stuck inside a house for about a year straight, unable to walk most days, feeling quite depressed due to it all and not knowing if it will ever improve or if it will require brain or spinal surgery? ...that there's a chance you could lose your legs? No, I didn't think so. ...so please, mind your own business. My ride understands my situation. They understand how depressed I am due to my condition. They know how much I crave social interaction and to feel like a real living person again. You don't, so shut it!" But, no, I held my ground and just tried to smile, like I always do.
When I got to know a guy from out of town and he told this before-mentioned individual, "I love this guy," the man who doesn't like me told him something negative about me. Once again, I laughed it off, as I always do.
I'm known to dress up for costume parties there and bring random things in to garner a few chuckles. So, a few of us were on the back patio and I don't remember what all was said, but again, this individual poked fun at me, saying something like, "...like someone who tries too hard to get laughs..." and looked at me. For the record, I think he's about the only one there who doesn't laugh at my costumes/jokes/etc.
There was a time when he tried arguing with me about former Florida head coach, Urban Meyer. I had heard from an inside source that it was very possible he'd be the next coach at Ohio State. He made it seem like a joke and guaranteed that was never going to happen. For the record, Urban Meyer is now the coach at Ohio State.
Yet another time, he got heated over a discussion about Carolina Panthers' rookie quarterback Cam Newton. All I said was that while he was off to a very good start, I'm not going to predict how quality of an NFL starter he's going to be in the long-term just yet, that I need more reps, more experience from the guy before I come to a conclusion. He acted furious, as he was dead certain Newton was going to be a great NFL quarterback for the long haul and was already one of the top 3-4 quarterbacks in the league.
He got heated. He was asking me who else in the league threw for as many yards as he did in the first couple games, who could throw the ball like him, etc. He put him right alongside Tom Brady and Drew Brees.
I said, "Yes, like I said, he's off to a very good start, but that's two games. That's a very small sample-size. If I had judged Troy Aikman or John Elway on their first couple games, I would have thought they'd be busts at quarterback as opposed to being Hall-of-Famers. Also, Carolina has been down most of the time, which requires the team to throw the ball more in an attempt to catch up to their opponent. Unless a quarterback is in a pass-dominated system, like Peyton Manning, Drew Brees or Tom Brady, the greater number of passing yards can often times mean the longer the team had to try and come back from a deficit."
He then finally settled on, "Well, you can't tell me that he has the tools to be a great quarterback."
To that, I agree. I never said the guy didn't have the talent, the skill set to be a long-term success in the NFL. I just said with the small sample-size of games played, of passes thrown, I wasn't going to decide on the guy one way or another at this point in time.
I also brought up the possibility of injury, especially for a guy like Newton who likes to run the ball some and with that, makes himself more susceptible to injury.
In response, this guy laughed and said, "So, you're going to bring up injury now?"
I laughed and said, "Eh, yeah. He is considered to be a dual-threat quarterback. Let's look at such quarterbacks in the past... Most of them suffered pretty serious injuries along the way, some of the career-ending variety. A quarterback can have one good season or even two good seasons. In order for me to consider a quarterback great, I have to see that high-level of play for multiple seasons. Newton isn't even at the halfway point of his rookie season. Let's wait a while before hailing him the next great quarterback."
Yeah, perhaps I'm biased, but I feel I was the more reasonable of the two. In any case, I tried to keep my cool and look at things from a broader perspective. I wasn't taking sides. I was trying to look at things from all points of view. Why he attempted to turn that into a heated debate is beyond me.
When I was propositioned by a married couple, whom had seemingly illustrated to me that they were happily married and trying to be "friends" of mine, this man sarcastically asked, "Well, what did you expect?"
Upon telling the story to others, this man said, "You love this don't you? All of the attention on you."
He then tried engaging in political discourse with me. We don't agree on much and based, in part, on the Cam Newton "discussion" and stories I've heard from others about him getting heated with regard to politics, I again tried to keep cool and look at things from a broader perspective, taking all viewpoints into account. This seemed to bother him.
When we talked about the Republican candidates, I brought up how it was likely that Mitt Romney would be the most difficult candidate for the Democrats to beat, as he has ties to the regularly blue states of Massachusetts and Michigan, Mormon ties in the battleground state of Colorado and due to his moderate past, could compete in blue states other Republican candidates could not. On the flip side, due to his faith, I could see some redder states being more fair play for Barack Obama as well. In the grand scheme of things, however, I thought the potential benefits outweighed the hindrances when it came to a Republican perspective of Mitt Romney and his chances of winning the 2012 presidential election. I brought up some other candidates and how they'd likely dominate the traditionally red states, especially in the southeast. However, it would be unlikely that they'd be able to compete in the blue states as Romney might. I wasn't illustrating bias. I wasn't trying to argue. I was just trying to be honest and to look at thing from a different perspective.
When we got into health care reform, I knew I was going to be in trouble. I brought up countries who have implemented universal health care, studies which showcase the level of contentment and well-being in those countries is typically far superior to those without such a health care system.
He brought up waiting lines and how many from Canada come to the U.S. for treatment, because they can't get that same treatment in their own country.
I said, "Well, yes, I have heard such stories, but have heard the direct opposite as well, of U.S. citizens going to Canada to get treatment."
He had never heard of such stories. By this point, I thought the conversation was rather pointless, because neither of us had any documentation to prove or disprove one's points.
He then asked if my personal health problems has an impact on my supporting universal health care reform, if that made me biased in favor of such a system.
I had to kind of laugh and thought to myself, "Eh, isn't it kind of inevitable for our own life experiences to effect our beliefs?" Of course, I didn't say that, but that's definitely what I was thinking.
There were a couple times he angrily spoke about Democrats, Obama in particular, but I bit my tongue and just nodded my head and smiled.
This past weekend, he was asking about why some Americans weren't pleased with Mitt Romney's tax returns. I attempted to answer the question, not from my own vantage point, but based on what he was asking - what people (in general) were upset about. So, I based my answer on conversations I've had, articles I've read, etc. He raised his voice and his wife had to explain that I wasn't supporting nor bashing these opinions. I was simply stating that's what these very Americans, whom he asked about, have been saying.
We then got into a discussion about "The Buffett Rule". Again, I tried not to take sides. I simply asked what was so awful about taxes on the upper 1-2% being increased from 35% to 39.6%, where they were during the Clinton years. He went off on some talking points-tangent.
I then said, "Well, you know taxes for the wealthy under Reagan was 50%, right?"
He angrily stated, "That's bulls**t."
I kind of laughed and said, "Okay then. Look it up."
He snapped, gave me his phone and told me to look it up.
Yeah, so I did. I googled "Reagan tax 50%" and came back with 3,700,000 results. I clicked on the first one and wouldn't you know it, for 5 of Reagan's 8 years in office, taxes for the wealthy was at 50.0% and for all 8 years, it averaged out to be right around there, 48.2%, I believe.
He responded with, "That's not true and you know it."
Again, I kind of laughed and said, "Okay. Click on the next link then."
This ended with him calling me a socialist and I'm not sure what else. At that point, I just said I was done and left.
He then sent some half-hearted apologies, which I am 99.834% certain were prompted by his wife.
So, what's the deal? I admit, he doesn't seem to smile or laugh often, so perhaps I'm taking this too personally. However, I haven't witnessed him getting after anyone like he has with me and seem so insistent on picking fights. I don't know what I did or said to cause this, but I wish it would stop, that he'd at least come forward to me, tell me what the problem is, if there is any, so I can hopefully help to solve that very problem. In any case, it's growing to be more uncomfortable for me to be around him. I can get along with pretty much anyone else in there, but for whatever reason, it seems to be a difficult task with him...and for the life of me, I can't figure out why.
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