I had some fun with the trending hashtag #IfTrumpWereSanta on Twitter over the holidays. Here are my posts, ordered from the most popular to the least popular (all my posts can be read here - https://twitter.com/CraigRozniecki):
1) He'd spend Christmas tweeting about all the great presents he handed out when he didn't hand out any.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
144 Likes, 29 Retweets
2) After a child sits on his lap, he'd ask, "So what do you want me to take from you this Christmas?"
#IfTrumpWereSanta
113 Likes, 26 Retweets
3) Once his sleigh breaks down, he'd blame Hillary and Obama.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
84 Likes, 17 Retweets
4) He'd only bring gifts to the wealthiest families and make the poorest families pay for them.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
55 Likes, 17 Retweets
5) Parents would no longer let their daughters sit on Santa's lap.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
44 Likes, 8 Retweets
6) To excuse himself of giving presents to kids, he refers to such items as fake toys.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
33 Likes, 14 Retweets
7) #IfTrumpWereSanta, even the Grinch would be saying, "That dude needs to lighten up."
34 Likes, 9 Retweets
8) He'd refer to gifts as promises and place empty ones underneath everyone's tree.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
31 Likes, 11 Retweets
9) He'd host a reality show called "Are You a 10? Finding the Next Mrs. Claus."
#IfTrumpWereSanta
34 Likes, 6 Retweets
10) He'd put America first by only buying gifts from China.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
26 Likes, 10 Retweets
11) He'd brag to Billy Bush about grabbing houses by the chimney.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
24 Likes, 8 Retweets
12) He'd provide more gifts per person in Wyoming than in California because of electoral college math.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
19 Likes, 11 Retweets
13) Instead of relying on reindeer to haul him around on a sleigh, members of his Cabinet would do so.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
18 Likes, 3 Retweets
14) He'd hire illegal immigrant Oompa Loompas as his elves.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
16 Likes, 2 Retweets
15) He'd fill stockings with coal of the people who'd been good this year.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
16 Likes, 0 Retweets
16) Christmas would go bankrupt.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
13 Likes, 2 Retweets
17) He'd alter the phrase "Have yourself a merry little Christmas" to "Have yourself a bigly little Christmas."
#IfTrumpWereSanta
13 Likes, 0 Retweets
Totals: 717 Likes, 173 Retweets (Averages of 42.2 Likes, 10.2 Retweets)
1) He'd spend Christmas tweeting about all the great presents he handed out when he didn't hand out any.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
144 Likes, 29 Retweets
2) After a child sits on his lap, he'd ask, "So what do you want me to take from you this Christmas?"
#IfTrumpWereSanta
113 Likes, 26 Retweets
3) Once his sleigh breaks down, he'd blame Hillary and Obama.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
84 Likes, 17 Retweets
4) He'd only bring gifts to the wealthiest families and make the poorest families pay for them.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
55 Likes, 17 Retweets
5) Parents would no longer let their daughters sit on Santa's lap.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
44 Likes, 8 Retweets
6) To excuse himself of giving presents to kids, he refers to such items as fake toys.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
33 Likes, 14 Retweets
7) #IfTrumpWereSanta, even the Grinch would be saying, "That dude needs to lighten up."
34 Likes, 9 Retweets
8) He'd refer to gifts as promises and place empty ones underneath everyone's tree.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
31 Likes, 11 Retweets
9) He'd host a reality show called "Are You a 10? Finding the Next Mrs. Claus."
#IfTrumpWereSanta
34 Likes, 6 Retweets
10) He'd put America first by only buying gifts from China.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
26 Likes, 10 Retweets
11) He'd brag to Billy Bush about grabbing houses by the chimney.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
24 Likes, 8 Retweets
12) He'd provide more gifts per person in Wyoming than in California because of electoral college math.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
19 Likes, 11 Retweets
13) Instead of relying on reindeer to haul him around on a sleigh, members of his Cabinet would do so.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
18 Likes, 3 Retweets
14) He'd hire illegal immigrant Oompa Loompas as his elves.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
16 Likes, 2 Retweets
15) He'd fill stockings with coal of the people who'd been good this year.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
16 Likes, 0 Retweets
16) Christmas would go bankrupt.
#IfTrumpWereSanta
13 Likes, 2 Retweets
17) He'd alter the phrase "Have yourself a merry little Christmas" to "Have yourself a bigly little Christmas."
#IfTrumpWereSanta
13 Likes, 0 Retweets
Totals: 717 Likes, 173 Retweets (Averages of 42.2 Likes, 10.2 Retweets)
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