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GOP: "Whatever Obama says, we say the opposite!"

Ever since President Obama was elected in November of 2008, the Republican Party's main goal has appeared to be making him a failure, or to at least appear that way in the eyes of the public. When he was elected to serve his first term as president, the GOP's main goal was to make certain he was just a one-term president. After he was elected to serve a second term, the GOP then decided it was their goal to make sure a Democrat didn't win the 2016 presidential election. For going on six years, the Republican Party has appeared to reside in a world known as Oppositeobamaland. Wherever the president has stood on an issue, without even hearing what he has to say, high ranking members of the GOP have said, "Yeah, whatever he said, we're against that! Oh, he's against it? Well, then we're for it!" When hearing the GOP constantly dispute the president on any and everything political, I've often times wondered if they'd react similarly to non-political issues or statements. Given their history, I wouldn't put it past them. Such disagreements would go as follows:

Obama: "I really wish more people would read for fun. Reading is a very good, healthy hobby to have. It helps us to learn, to use our imaginations, and so much more!"

GOP: "The president thinks we should read more? Only nerds read. Once you get through school, what's the point of reading anyway? If you're going to read, do yourselves a favor and just read the Cliff Notes version of a haiku. You're welcome, America."


Obama: "There have been times since I've been president when I've felt really bad about not being able to spend more time with my wife, Michelle, and show how much I love her. That's what every husband should do - make certain to make our wives feel special and loved. If they don't feel that way, then we're doing something wrong, and should do everything in our power to fix those wrongs."

GOP: "I'm sorry to break it to the president, but he's got it all wrong. It's not our job to make our wives happy. They should be happy just knowing they're making us happy. That's how the world works, people! Make us dinner, clean up after us, do the nasty with us, and let us do anything without fuss, and we'll be happy. In that scenario, the wives would have done their jobs, and that right there, that should make them happy. Whenever our wives don't talk to us for a few days due to all of this, that's when we know they're happy - well, we're happy at least, and that's all that really matters."


Obama: "Kids are so precious. I can't tell you how grateful I am for Michelle and my two lovely daughters, Malia and Sasha. It's amazing how quickly they're growing up. Pretty soon, they'll be off to college, exploring the world, and making a difference. We're proud of them already, but know the sky is the limit as far as their dreams, potential, and futures go."

GOP: "Look - we don't want to cause a stir or anything, but the only time kids aren't annoying is when they're inside their mothers. That's why we're so anti-abortion. When they're inside their mothers, we don't have to change their diapers or teach them anything. We wouldn't anyway, but still, just the thought is aggravating, to say the least. A catchy slogan might be something like, 'When inside the mothers, kids are alright. When outside the mothers, kids whine, pout, and cry, so they kinda suck.' That's poetry right there, folks."

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