Skip to main content

#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump and #TrumpDayCareActivities

I had some fun with the trending hashtags #ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump and #TrumpDayCareActivities on Twitter over the past couple of days. Here are my posts, ordered from the most popular to the least popular (all my tweets can be seen here - https://twitter.com/CraigRozniecki):

1) A blind taxi driver who just lost everything in a divorce
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
197 Likes, 48 Retweets

2) A drug-addicted Pinocchio suffering from coke withdrawals
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
106 Likes, 20 Retweets

3) Removing black and brown crayons from the crayon box and tossing them in the garbage
#TrumpDayCareActivities
98 Likes, 26 Retweets

4) Marriage counselor Jerry Springer
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
85 Likes, 19 Retweets

5) A horoscope which reads, "The winning lottery number is going to be A, B, C, D, Pi, and 726."
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
68 Likes, 12 Retweets

6) A psychic with the last name of Scammer
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
66 Likes, 12 Retweets

7) Pushing around other kids, and when getting called out for it, blaming Obama
#TrumpDayCareActivities
48 Likes, 12 Retweets

8) A meteorologist giving a forecast while experiencing acid flashbacks
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
45 Likes, 11 Retweets

9) A hooker named Chastity
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
46 Likes, 9 Retweets

10) Setting the world record for tiniest hand turkey
#TrumpDayCareActivities
37 Likes, 11 Retweets

10) A slot machine called Master Thief
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
41 Likes, 7 Retweets

12) The Starbucks spell-checker
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
39 Likes, 8 Retweets

13) Refusing to run around outside due to an allegedly disabling papercut
#TrumpDayCareActivities
32 Likes, 13 Retweets

14) Balls handed to me by Tom Brady
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
30 Likes, 8 Retweets

15) Is told to draw circles, draws squares instead, gets told squares aren't circles, and calls it fake news
#TrumpDayCareActivities
29 Likes, 5 Retweets

16) A full-body condom that's gone through a car-wash 45 times
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
27 Likes, 5 Retweets

17) Clint Eastwood's talking chair
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
27 Likes, 4 Retweets

17) Direct TV during Hurricane Spectrum
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
28 Likes, 3 Retweets

19) Stevie Wonder at a shooting range
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
24 Likes, 6 Retweets

19) That 5th dentist who never approves of anything
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
26 Likes, 4 Retweets

21) Humpty Dumpty on an invisible wall
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
20 Likes, 8 Retweets

22) Roasting marshmallows with a pyromaniac named George Burns
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
21 Likes, 6 Retweets

23) Jack Daniels, when watching 3 am infomercials, with a credit card and phone nearby
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
22 Likes, 4 Retweets

24) Grabbing Barbie dolls by the pus*y
#TrumpDayCareActivities
20 Likes, 5 Retweets

24) Building a big, beautiful wall with invisible blocks
#TrumpDayCareActivities
20 Likes, 5 Retweets

26) A pregnant virgin car salesperson
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
18 Likes, 6 Retweets

26) The Dairy Queen diet plan
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
21 Likes, 3 Retweets

28) A drunken Christopher Columbus trying to find his intended destination
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
15 Likes, 8 Retweets

28) A cable company's arrival-time estimator
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
18 Likes, 5 Retweets

28) A mime singing the National Anthem
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
20 Likes, 3 Retweets

31) Continually shouting "covfefe," before saying, "Making English great again!"
#TrumpDayCareActivities
19 Likes, 1 Retweet

32) The ghost working over at Walmart's electronics
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
16 Likes, 1 Retweet

33) A hungover MapQuest
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
12 Likes, 3 Retweets

34) Listening to books being read while eating a bucket of fried chicken
#TrumpDayCareActivities
14 Likes, 1 Retweet

35) Asking for loans to create LEGO steaks and vodka
#TrumpDayCareActivities
10 Likes, 2 Retweets

36) Fashion advice from Oscar the Grouch
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
11 Likes, 0 Retweets

37) Lawyer Keyser Soze
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
10 Likes, 0 Retweets

38) Bernie Sanders' hair during a windstorm
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
8 Likes, 1 Retweet

39) Michael Bay rom-coms
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
6 Likes, 2 Retweets

40) Motivational speaker Ben Stein
#ThingsITrustMoreThanTrump
2 Likes, 0 Retweets

Totals: 1,202 Likes, 307 Retweets (Averages of 30.1 Likes, 7.7 Retweets)

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun...

Trump's Lie Tally at the CNN Debate

1) "We had the greatest economy in the history of our country. We had never done so well. Every – everybody was amazed by it. Other countries were copying us." 2) "But the thing we never got the credit for, and we should have, is getting us out of that COVID mess." 3) "The only jobs he created are for illegal immigrants and bounceback jobs; they’re bounced back from the COVID." 4) "Not going to drive them higher. It’s just going to cause countries that have been ripping us off for years, like China and many others, in all fairness to China – it’s going to just force them to pay us a lot of money, reduce our deficit tremendously, and give us a lot of power for other things." (tariffs) 5) "He also said he inherited 9 percent inflation." 6) "No, he inherited almost no inflation and it stayed that way for 14 months. And then it blew up under his leadership, because they spent money like a bunch of people that didn’t know what t...