My, wasn't that headline an attention grabber? How many guys read that, immediately clicked on it, and thought, "I'm going to discover the secret on how to find the love of my life!" or probably more accurately, thought, "I'm going to discover the secret on how to bang as many chicks as possible!" Well, sorry to disappoint you, but you won't be reading about such secrets in this blog. So, if that is what you were seeking, I suggest you run along now. ::waits for a couple minutes::
No, whether it be a friend or a friend with whom I've sought something more, I've held a certain power over women, especially in the past 4 years, I'd say. What's this power one may ask? Making them feel like world-class b*tches by always being good to them, and then when I turn around seeking their friendship or expressing my feelings for something greater when they've showcased in just about every manner that they're interested, and they turn me down and I confront them on matters, they feel truly awful and block me from their lives in order to try and rid themselves of these feelings of guilt.
This has happened quite a number of times, unfortunately, in the past 4 years. In fact, it again just happened last week. This lady and I had been friends for a little over a year. Whenever she needed someone to talk to, I was there for her, as a friend should be. This happened just a couple of Sundays ago. She was lonely, tired of traveling, upset with one friend and worried about another, so I was there to listen, comfort her, and provide quality feedback and room for hope. She's come to me more often than she had been these past couple weeks and as always, I was a good friend. However, when I recently asked for the favor to be returned, she was nowhere to be found, seemed to become distant, and I confronted her on matters. I obviously made her feel like crap and unintentionally so. When I get hurt or angry, I don't lash out at people by hurling insults and four-letter words. My voice might be slightly raised out of aggravation, but I still speak to them as people, as friends, as individuals I care for and respect. Perhaps this kind of respectful tone is even more difficult to take for some people than an angry one with vulgarity being spewed from the lips at a rate not seen since Richard Pryor's impersonator whom had Tourette's Syndrome.
In the end, I guess the truth of my words to these women have a significant impact on them, where they'll reflect some, and make the necessary changes to prevent such occurrences from happening again. While it's very understandable that we all like to feel good, so when a person brings joy to our lives, it's quite easy for most of us to allow them into our circles so long as the positivity continues. However, if the only reason we're in a relationship of any kind is the joy another person brings us, we have to be mindful that they have feelings of their own and instead of using and inevitably hurting them somewhere down the line, we should be up-front and honest with both them and ourselves, because while it may temporarily feel good to be around someone whom genuinely likes and cares about us, that temporary joy won't be worth the inevitable pain that is felt when that other person comes to the realization that the feelings of care and love aren't mutual. Honesty may result in temporary pain, but leading a person on before revealing the truth is far more hurtful and damaging.
No, whether it be a friend or a friend with whom I've sought something more, I've held a certain power over women, especially in the past 4 years, I'd say. What's this power one may ask? Making them feel like world-class b*tches by always being good to them, and then when I turn around seeking their friendship or expressing my feelings for something greater when they've showcased in just about every manner that they're interested, and they turn me down and I confront them on matters, they feel truly awful and block me from their lives in order to try and rid themselves of these feelings of guilt.
This has happened quite a number of times, unfortunately, in the past 4 years. In fact, it again just happened last week. This lady and I had been friends for a little over a year. Whenever she needed someone to talk to, I was there for her, as a friend should be. This happened just a couple of Sundays ago. She was lonely, tired of traveling, upset with one friend and worried about another, so I was there to listen, comfort her, and provide quality feedback and room for hope. She's come to me more often than she had been these past couple weeks and as always, I was a good friend. However, when I recently asked for the favor to be returned, she was nowhere to be found, seemed to become distant, and I confronted her on matters. I obviously made her feel like crap and unintentionally so. When I get hurt or angry, I don't lash out at people by hurling insults and four-letter words. My voice might be slightly raised out of aggravation, but I still speak to them as people, as friends, as individuals I care for and respect. Perhaps this kind of respectful tone is even more difficult to take for some people than an angry one with vulgarity being spewed from the lips at a rate not seen since Richard Pryor's impersonator whom had Tourette's Syndrome.
In the end, I guess the truth of my words to these women have a significant impact on them, where they'll reflect some, and make the necessary changes to prevent such occurrences from happening again. While it's very understandable that we all like to feel good, so when a person brings joy to our lives, it's quite easy for most of us to allow them into our circles so long as the positivity continues. However, if the only reason we're in a relationship of any kind is the joy another person brings us, we have to be mindful that they have feelings of their own and instead of using and inevitably hurting them somewhere down the line, we should be up-front and honest with both them and ourselves, because while it may temporarily feel good to be around someone whom genuinely likes and cares about us, that temporary joy won't be worth the inevitable pain that is felt when that other person comes to the realization that the feelings of care and love aren't mutual. Honesty may result in temporary pain, but leading a person on before revealing the truth is far more hurtful and damaging.
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