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When an eternal optimist sounds eternally stupid

I read a Columbus Dispatch letter-to-the-editor today and honestly had to reread it to make certain it wasn't written by someone at The Onion. Sadly, it wasn't. The letter, titled, "Global warming has positive for Earth," was written by Rick Gibbs, and goes as follows:

"I often see letters concerning climate change that seem to have a political leaning. These writers often speak of doom and gloom, yet I never see a letter that mentions that there could be positive changes.

It is estimated that there will be 9 billion people by 2050. Perhaps having vast areas of Canada and Siberia opened to agriculture to help feed the world's hungry people would be a good thing.

Further, it has been said that the polar ice is melting. Perhaps adding more liquid water to the water cycle will increase overall world soil hydration, as well as release more water to give a drink to the world's thirsty people.

Perhaps longer growing cycles will increase diversity in the food crops we all enjoy.

In my life, I have found few things that happen that don't come with benefits as well as negative results."

Yes, so long to the coasts of many countries due to raised sea levels, as well as the inland portions of several countries due to an increased quantity of severe storms (as well as an increase in the severity of the storms), but it will be all for the better; you'll see. Sorry, Florida...

Given Gibbs' positive take on global warming and his philosophy that all things contain both benefits and hindrances, here's how I see him commenting on other issues:

Subject: Poverty

Gibbs: "If a person is poor, that means they get to appreciate all the little things in life more, like food they find in the trash that might make them sick, puddles of dirty water to drink on the street, or toy rocks they can use like Legos to build a giant caveman's castle of some kind."


Subject: Segregation

Gibbs: "Segregation helps people learn about themselves, their history, and grow pride in who they are and where they come from. Without it, we'd lack that self-awareness and just think that we're all people or something."


Subject: The Holocaust

Gibbs: "Jesus was Jewish, so a lot of people went to heaven around that time!"


Yeah, for his next writing, I suggest Mr. Gibbs write a book, entitled, "How To Make An Eternal Optimist Sound Eternally Stupid."

http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/editorials/2015/03/31/1-global-warming.html

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