Skip to main content

Guns in churches? Arkansas Senate says Hallelujah to that!

Let's be honest - Jesus loved guns. For in the book of NotActually, chapter 6, verses 66-68, Jesus said:

"Only pussies turn the other cheek. I say shoot those no good motherf***ers down, yo. Amen."

I only say this because this past Monday, the Arkansas state Senate passed a bill which will allow people to carry concealed guns in churches.

The bill is called the Church Protection Act of 2013 (SB-71) and passed by a very convincing 28-4 margin. It'll need to pass the state House of Representatives and be signed by Governor Mike Beebe to become law.

Part of the bill reads as follows:

"It is found and determined by the General Assembly of the State of Arkansas that personal security is increasingly important; that the Second Amendment of the Constitution of the United States ensures a person's right to bear arms; and that this act is immediately necessary because a person should be allowed to carry a firearm in a church that permits the carrying of a firearm for personal security."

If this bill should pass, I'm thinking churches around the state of Arkansas may need to alter some of their hymns to the following titles:

"When the Saints Come Shooting In"

"Jesus Loves Me and My Gun"

"God and Guns Are So Good"

"Oh Come All Ye Shooters"

"Jesus Loves the Little Pistols"

At the closing of a prayer, it will soon become mandatory for people to fire their guns in the air after they say, "Amen." Amen, indeed.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/01/29/guns-in-churches-concealed-arkansas_n_2575472.html

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun...

Mentioned on Crooks and Liars and Hinterland Gazette!

Due to some tweets of mine, I got mentioned on the following two sites (all my tweets can be viewed here -  https://twitter.com/CraigRozniecki ): https://crooksandliars.com/2019/04/trump-gives-stupid-advice-george https://hinterlandgazette.com/2019/03/istandwithschiff-is-trending-after-donald-trump-led-gop-attack-on-adam-schiff-backfires-spectacularly.html

Face guarding is legal in college football and the NFL

I just wanted to remind fans and announcers especially, that face guarding is legal in both college football and the NFL. It all comes down to contact. So long as a defender doesn't make contact with an intended receiver, he doesn't have to turn around to play the ball. I can't tell you how many times every week I hear announcers talk about face guarding being a penalty. It's not. I even heard one announcer yesterday state, "If the defender doesn't turn around and play the ball, the ref will call pass interference every time." That's simply not true. Courtesy of referee Bill LeMonnier, he says this with regard to the rule at the college level (answered on 8/12/13): "NCAA rules on pass interference require the face guarding to have contact to be a foul. No contact, no foul by NCAA rules." In the NFL rule book, this is written:  "Actions that constitute defensive pass interference include but are not limited to: (a) Contact by a ...