Have you read any stories recently about how bad the smog is in China? It's been so bad, even some late-night talk show hosts have jokingly said, "While you can see the Great Wall of China from space, you can't see the Great Wall of China in China." Well, never fear according to CCTV (China Central Television), which has attempted to place a positive spin on it all.
According to CCTV, there are five reasons the Chinese should be cheerful about the smog:
1) "The pollution crisis 'unifies' Chinese people because it is so widespread"
2) "It is making China more equal because the smog is affecting both the rich and the poor"
3) "It raises citizen awareness and is a reminder that China is 'the factory of the world'"
4) "Chinese people are better humored in a crisis and have already made up 'smog jokes'"
5) "The population is more educated now - they have improved knowledge of meteorology"
That's one way of looking at it. I'm not sure it's really a laughing matter, though - first, because it's not funny, and second, because most people are probably too busy coughing to laugh.
With this kind of thinking, if global warming gets as bad as climatologists fear, long-time climate-change doubters may try to similarly place a positive spin on the matter by making a list like the following:
1) Whether it be August or the middle of January, in Hawaii or Alaska, it'll probably be the perfect time for a barbecue, and who doesn't like barbecues? Communists? From this point forward, every February 14th, the new Valentine's Day logo will be of Cupid holding an arrow and some barbecued chicken!
2) Like most people, you've probably wanted a pool at one point or another. Well, now you don't need to fear about all the costs affiliated with getting a pool. Now just about everyone not only has a pool in their backyards, but a river, where you can swim for fun, fish for relaxation, or raft to work! Work might not be fun, but getting there will be a blast! Who in the world hasn't wanted to one day say, "I put on my swim-trunks today, got on the raft, and coasted to work!"? That's what we thought!
3) For those of you not living in Florida, Hawaii, or Arizona, parts of which are gone now, haven't you always wanted a warm Christmas? Screw white Christmases, right? What fun are those? Sledding, slipping and sliding around, praying you don't have to drive? From this point forward you'll get to go around caroling in a t-shirt and shorts, singing the Beach Boys' greatest hits! Come on, what could be better than smoking a cigar, tanning, and drinking an ice cold beer on December 25th every year while on the back deck?
4) Whether we want to admit it or not, we love seeing naked people. Well, nowadays, we get to see more people in the nude than we see people in suits! It's fantastic! More naked people means more sex which means more orgasms, kids, diseases, and, well, happiness. No longer do guys have to get drunk to go up to a woman and say, "So, do you wanna get naked?" She already will be, fellas! People used to hate the player or the game. Now all you players will be ahead of the game!
5) Sure, more and more homes are getting damaged due to hurricanes and tornadoes, but what's more fun than a treasure hunt? You may have lost just about everything, but you just never know what you might find next! A used plastic cup, a broken watch, a sex tape called New Kids On The Block: Behind the Scenes and Each Other, etc. The possibilities are endless!
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2521201/Chinas-state-media-condemned-article-saying-smog-GOOD.html
According to CCTV, there are five reasons the Chinese should be cheerful about the smog:
1) "The pollution crisis 'unifies' Chinese people because it is so widespread"
2) "It is making China more equal because the smog is affecting both the rich and the poor"
3) "It raises citizen awareness and is a reminder that China is 'the factory of the world'"
4) "Chinese people are better humored in a crisis and have already made up 'smog jokes'"
5) "The population is more educated now - they have improved knowledge of meteorology"
That's one way of looking at it. I'm not sure it's really a laughing matter, though - first, because it's not funny, and second, because most people are probably too busy coughing to laugh.
With this kind of thinking, if global warming gets as bad as climatologists fear, long-time climate-change doubters may try to similarly place a positive spin on the matter by making a list like the following:
1) Whether it be August or the middle of January, in Hawaii or Alaska, it'll probably be the perfect time for a barbecue, and who doesn't like barbecues? Communists? From this point forward, every February 14th, the new Valentine's Day logo will be of Cupid holding an arrow and some barbecued chicken!
2) Like most people, you've probably wanted a pool at one point or another. Well, now you don't need to fear about all the costs affiliated with getting a pool. Now just about everyone not only has a pool in their backyards, but a river, where you can swim for fun, fish for relaxation, or raft to work! Work might not be fun, but getting there will be a blast! Who in the world hasn't wanted to one day say, "I put on my swim-trunks today, got on the raft, and coasted to work!"? That's what we thought!
3) For those of you not living in Florida, Hawaii, or Arizona, parts of which are gone now, haven't you always wanted a warm Christmas? Screw white Christmases, right? What fun are those? Sledding, slipping and sliding around, praying you don't have to drive? From this point forward you'll get to go around caroling in a t-shirt and shorts, singing the Beach Boys' greatest hits! Come on, what could be better than smoking a cigar, tanning, and drinking an ice cold beer on December 25th every year while on the back deck?
4) Whether we want to admit it or not, we love seeing naked people. Well, nowadays, we get to see more people in the nude than we see people in suits! It's fantastic! More naked people means more sex which means more orgasms, kids, diseases, and, well, happiness. No longer do guys have to get drunk to go up to a woman and say, "So, do you wanna get naked?" She already will be, fellas! People used to hate the player or the game. Now all you players will be ahead of the game!
5) Sure, more and more homes are getting damaged due to hurricanes and tornadoes, but what's more fun than a treasure hunt? You may have lost just about everything, but you just never know what you might find next! A used plastic cup, a broken watch, a sex tape called New Kids On The Block: Behind the Scenes and Each Other, etc. The possibilities are endless!
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2521201/Chinas-state-media-condemned-article-saying-smog-GOOD.html
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