Douche of the Year - GOP Congressional candidate Ian Bayne

While I've awarded a handful of people as Douche of the Day (no, not on the same day), I honestly hadn't given much thought to an award for Douche of the Year. I had read and heard so many ridiculous statements, they all kind of blended in with one another after a while - that is, until today.

Earlier today, GOP Illinois Congressional candidate Ian Bayne decided to weigh in on the Phil Robertson-Duck Dynasty debate, when he said this:

"In December 1955, Rosa Parks took a stand against an unjust societal persecution of black people, and in December 2013, Robertson took a stand against persecution of Christians. What Parks did was courageous. What Mr. Robertson did was courageous too."

That's right, ladies and gentlemen - Ian Bayne actually compared Phil Robertson's recent actions with Rosa Parks' actions back in 1955 and beyond. While I have given George W. Bush and Rick Perry, in particular, a hard time for not coming across as the brightest crayons in the box, Mr. Bayne's insanely idiotic statement makes them come across like James Earl Jones giving a lecture on Physics.

Let's compare these two people and their actions, shall we? Rosa Parks lived in a time of segregation. African-Americans, such as herself, were once slaves in this country, and during her time, they were separated from whites and seen as inferior to them. They didn't have the right to vote. They had to face the wrath of the Ku Klux Klan and other racist organizations and the hate-crimes in which they engaged. In 1955, Rosa Parks refused to move from the white area of a bus to the "colored" area, and she was arrested for her actions. Through her dedication and many other people's, African-Americans were able to defeat the segregation laws, were able to vote, and have been closing the gap, but striving to attain full equality on multiple fronts ever since.

Phil Robertson is a white Christian man, who recently came under fire due to some remarks he made in an interview with GQ magazine, where he compared homosexuality to bestiality, insinuated that gays will go to hell, and even that African-Americans were happy during their slave days. He's since been suspended from Duck Dynasty for these controversial comments.

Okay, now let's break things down:

Slaves in this country

African-Americans: Yes

White Christians: No

Segregation laws pertaining to them

African-Americans: Yes

White Christians: No

Intent of their actions

Rosa Parks: Fight against bigotry and inequality

Phil Robertson: Fight for bigotry and inequality

Result of their actions

Rosa Parks: Arrested

Phil Robertson: Suspension from a television show

Phil Robertson isn't the Rosa Parks of this generation. The man is fighting for what she fought against, and to compare the two is about as absurd as comparing Stalin to Jesus. I've read and heard a lot of ridiculous comments this year, but comparing a racist homophobe as standing up for Christians to an African-American woman fighting against segregation and inequality has to be the most ridiculous one I've heard of the bunch. Thanks to this remarkably stupid quote, I'm awarding the Douche of the Year Award to GOP Illinois Congressional candidate Ian Bayne. Congratulations!

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Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun

The difference between "looking" and "checking out"

I may be way off with these numbers, but it's my approximation that at least 75% of individuals whom are involved in a serious relationship feel it's perfectly acceptable to "check out" members of the opposite sex they're not involved with. Meanwhile, approximately 25% either don't feel this is acceptable or aren't sure about the matter. I hadn't thought about this matter for a while, but since I've been dating a woman for about 8 months, the topic has been pondered about some. When reading or hearing others discuss this very issue, I often times hear comments similar to the following: "It's human nature to look." "There's nothing wrong with checking others out. I'm sure he/she does it too!" "It's fine to do it. Just don't tell your boyfriend/girlfriend about it or do it in front of them!" "It's natural to find people attractive." When observing the array of comments, I i

The verdict is in. To no one's surprise, Jonathan Hoenig has been found guilty of being an idiot.

Just recently, when discussing the Michael Brown shooting and whether or not race had anything to do with it, Fox News contributor Jonathan Hoenig said, "You know who talks about race? Racists." One moment while I provide Mr. Hoenig with the well deserved slow-clap. :: slow-claps for two seconds :: So, that was quite the line by Mr. Hoenig, wasn't it? "You know who talks about race? Racists." Well, wasn't he just talking about race? So, by his own words, I guess that makes him a racist. Also, if he wants to be consistent, does this mean that people whom talk about gender are sexists and people whom talk about sexual orientation are homophobes? With that line of thinking, Hoenig would engage in the following back-and-forths: Hoenig: "So, who are you voting for?" A woman: "The Democratic candidate, because he's been adamant about his support for equal rights for women." Hoenig: "You sexist feminist nazi!"

The Kind-Hearted Smart Aleck

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