Transcript for Podcast: "I Feel Snitty," Episode 1: "'Liberal' is Moral and Normal, but Not a 'Hamberder'"
Podcast: "I Feel Snitty"
Episode 1: "'Liberal' is Moral and Normal, but Not a 'Hamberder'"
Premiere Date: 7/17/19
Length: 15:25 (1,841 words)
Link: https://ifeelsnitty.podbean.com/e/liberal-is-moral-and-normal-but-not-a-hamberder/
Transcript:
Introduction
Good day, and welcome to the brand new show, I Feel Snitty. I’m your host, Craig Rozniecki. On this show, we’ll be combining facts, logic, and snark to tackle all the hot topics of this week, last week, and even six weeks from now. As Joe Biden’s comedian doppelganger might say, we’re going to “mock malarkey.”
Let me start this show by making a confession. I’m a liberal. Yes, I’m one of “those.” Don’t run away just yet, though. I’m confident, by the end of this episode, I’ll make at least a few listeners whom wouldn’t ordinarily classify themselves as liberal, think twice about the matter, before mumbling, “Yeah, yeah. Okay, I guess I’m one of them too.”
Especially since the inception of Fox News in ‘96, and in conjunction with right-wing talk radio heads like Rush Limbaugh, the term liberal has been regularly bastardized in this country, to the point where many liberal-leaners refer to themselves as moderates. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard right-wing talking heads utter the following quotes:
- “Liberalism is evil.”
- “Liberals want to take away your guns.”
- “Liberalism is a mental disorder.”
- “Liberals are going to raise your taxes.”
- “Liberalism. Find a cure.”
Not only that, conservatives and Republicans have consistently associated the term liberal with the following words, which tend to hold a negative connotation: communism, socialism, Marxism, baby-killers, tax and spend, etc.
The actual definition of liberal, courtesy of Merriam-Webster: generous and open-minded.
The mainstream media hasn’t been helping matters any either. When discussing the Democratic primary, talk about whether or not Democratic candidates have moved too far left, or are in essence too liberal, is discussed more often than cars take left turns at the Daytona 500. What they all fail to realize, though, is that when you look at the individual issues, this country is far more liberal than many would have you believe.
Americans’ Ideology (Gallup)
1992
Moderate: 43%
Conservative: 36%
Liberal: 17%
2018
Moderate: 35% (-8%)
Conservative: 35% (-1%)
Liberal: 26% (+9%)
Americans on Specific Issues
- 92% support requiring background checks for firearms purchases (Gallup, October 2018)
- 83% support giving DREAMers who have met certain requirements a chance to become U.S. citizens (Gallup, January 27th 2019)
- 81% support giving illegal immigrants who have met certain requirements a chance to become U.S. citizens (Gallup, January 27th 2019)
- 79% favor abortions being legal in any or some circumstances (Gallup, May 2018)
- 76% support increased taxes on the rich (POLITICO/Morning Consult, February 4th 2019)
- 75% support adding a Constitutional amendment to overturn Citizens United (Voice of the People, May 2018)
- 69% support stricter gun laws (Reuters/Ipsos, February 8th 2019)
- 68% support raising the legal age to purchase a firearm (Gallup, October 2018)
- 67% support gay marriage rights (Gallup, May 2018)
- 66% support marijuana legalization (Gallup, October 22nd 2018)
- 63% support automatic voter registration (Gallup, August 22nd 2016)
- 62% believe the government is doing too little to combat climate-change (Gallup, March 29th 2018)
- 61% support strong or moderate gun restrictions (Gallup, October 2018)
- 56% support Medicare-for-All (Kaiser, April 24th 2019)
- 56% support banning the sale of semi-automatics (Gallup, October 2018)
This negative branding of the term liberal is similar to that of Obamacare. In a February 7th 2017 New York Times poll, while the Affordable Care Act, which is actually the official name of “Obamacare,” polled in positive territory (+4), Obamacare polled at slightly under water (-1). No matter what one calls it, while Republicans’ negative branding of the law was effective at the outset, that effectiveness has begun to wane, especially since, ironically enough, Obama left office. According to Kaiser tracking polls (12/19/18), in March of 2014, the Affordable Care Act was at a net -15 approval rating. It was at an even par when President Obama left office. As of November 2018, the law had a net +13 approval, as 53% approved and 40% disapproved. Hopefully we see such a trend with regard to liberalism as well.
Segueing from that, believe it or not, the Democratic Party has not always been the liberal party and the Republican Party has not always been the conservative party. Democrats used to be conservative and Republicans used to be liberal. This is why it always baffles me when modern-day Republicans call themselves the party of Lincoln and Democrats the party of the KKK. Check the history books. The GOP used to embrace the “liberal” label to a far greater extent than did Democrats. The Republican Party slowly started trending more conservative in the 1930s until, in 1964, when Democrat Lyndon B. Johnson signed the Civil Rights Act, the transformation became complete. “Dixiecrats,” as they were known, left their party to join Republicans; liberals left the GOP to become Democrats; and the solid blue South became redder than a blushing Satan after falling asleep in a tanning bed. So when modern-day Republicans play the Party-History card, they’re not telling the whole story. Hell, they’re not even telling half the story, for regardless of party name, liberals have always been liberals and conservatives have always been conservatives. The so-called KKK-loving Democratic Party of the past is the Republican Party of today and the liberal slave-freeing Abraham Lincoln was a Republican in yesteryear, but would undoubtedly be a Democrat today.
Keeping all of what I just talked about in mind, I’m now going to read to you a Letterman-like Top Ten List I concocted. Here are the Top Ten Signs You’re NOT a Liberal. Again, that’s Top Ten Signs You’re NOT a Liberal.
The Top Ten Signs You’re NOT A Liberal
10. You believe in nothing larger than yourself, besides the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man version of Shaquille O’Neal.
9. You think Oprah should hand out six cars to every American, including blind people.
8. You believe that when life throws a fist at your face, you should take it smiling and then kiss it.
7. You think nothing illustrates more respect for our troops than doing the hokey-pokey during the National Anthem.
6. You think, when a person is cremated, their ashes should automatically be registered to vote.
5. You started a social movement called “Only Poor Gay Black Female Muslim RuPaul Fan Club Members’ Lives Matter.”
4. You feel that guns are the cause for all of the world’s problems, including: diabetes, herpes, and sword fights.
3. You think everyone’s taxes should be the equivalent of Donald Trump’s 1st Grade English test score - 50%.
2. You believe marriage is between three men, two women, one hermaphrodite, a skyscraper named after a superhero, and a lion named Sourpuss.
1. (drumroll) When filling out a dating site profile, under “hobbies” you write, “Working hard to play hard, long walks on the beach, and having abortions.”
Let’s now move on to a segment I call ELF, which stands for Epic Logic Fail.
ELF (Epic Logic Fail)
Meme: “Liberalism is all about control: control over what you can say; control over what you can read; control over what you can drive; control over what you can eat; control over what you can drink; control over your guns; control over your news; control what you learn; control your healthcare; control your kid’s education.”
Let’s go through these claims one by one…
- “Control over what you can say.”
What, like discouraging use of the n-word and c-word? Yeah, that’s awfully stringent…
- “Control over what you can read.”
They may have a point here. I mean, liberals have tried preventing the public from being able to read the full Mueller Report. Oh, wait, that was the conservatives…
- “Control over what you can drive.”
Say what? You mean trying to manufacture more fuel-efficient and less pollution-inducing automobiles, which benefit both the environment and people’s wallets, and providing said vehicles as an option? Okay then…
- “Control over what you can eat.”
No, we just want to keep in tact FDA regulations so fewer people die. We’re monsters like that.
- “Control over what you can drink.”
Yeah, Flint water is bad. Next…
- “Control over your guns.”
It shouldn’t be easier to purchase firearms than Sudafed. Period. More like exclamation point!
- “Control over your news.”
The fact that the propaganda-spewing Fox News Channel is in existence at all disproves this point. There’s a good reason why Fox News sounds so similar to Fake News.
- “Control what you learn.”
How is this one even possible?
Teacher: “What did you learn today?”
Student: “That the capital city of New Jersey is Trenton.”
Teacher: “No, you didn’t. Let me tell you what you learned…”
I don’t think so…
- “Control your healthcare.”
Providing people who didn’t before have healthcare with health insurance is controlling their healthcare? So according to them, no healthcare is better than healthcare, because with healthcare, we’ve given all control to the government, but without healthcare, we have firm control over the healthcare we don’t have? Yeah, that makes sense…
- “Control over your kid’s education.”
Yes, because teaching facts over debunked conspiracies has always been a bad thing…
Liberals don’t want to control people’s behavior. They (We) simply want to provide better and healthier options; educate; and then allow people to make decisions for themselves. What this conservative meme essentially says is that if a vehicle isn’t safety-checked and a person doesn’t believe a blind, five-time drunk driver should be able to legally drive this automobile, he or she is a liberal and trying to control you. If anyone’s about control, it’s conservatives. Just ask women’s vaginas.
Before I wrap things up, I’d like to share with you a segment I call From Snark to Finish.
From Snark to Finish
If you take just one thing from this episode with you, let it be this. If you want people to be healthy and happy, you’re evil. If you believe in The Golden Rule, you’re part of a cult. If you want fewer people to die of gun violence, you’re a sinner. If you allow science, reason, and facts to dictate your opinions, you have a mental illness. In order to be good, decent, patriotic, and holy, you must consistently utter that which isn’t true. You must falsely believe all planets revolve around you. You must believe benevolent and Jewish Jesus builds walls to prevent fellow non-whites from entering, all the while holding an AR-15, an AK-47, and looking straight into a camera, saying, “If this robe and these sandals don’t tell you how much I love capitalism, I don’t know what will!”
Close
…and that’s where we’ll end things on today’s episode. Join me next week when we’ll be talking about… something else. Until then, be sure to check me out at… Pod Bean (I Feel Snitty), https://twitter.com/craigrozniecki?lang=en (Twitter), https://thekind-heartedsmartaleck.blogspot.com/ (blog), and https://www.amazon.com/Craig-Rozniecki/e/B00JBQ95LO (Amazon/books). This has been I Feel Snitty with Craig Rozniecki, letting you know that if you order a hamberder, be sure to ask for a healthy side of covfefe. Take care.
Episode 1: "'Liberal' is Moral and Normal, but Not a 'Hamberder'"
Premiere Date: 7/17/19
Length: 15:25 (1,841 words)
Link: https://ifeelsnitty.podbean.com/e/liberal-is-moral-and-normal-but-not-a-hamberder/
Transcript:
Introduction
Good day, and welcome to the brand new show, I Feel Snitty. I’m your host, Craig Rozniecki. On this show, we’ll be combining facts, logic, and snark to tackle all the hot topics of this week, last week, and even six weeks from now. As Joe Biden’s comedian doppelganger might say, we’re going to “mock malarkey.”
Let me start this show by making a confession. I’m a liberal. Yes, I’m one of “those.” Don’t run away just yet, though. I’m confident, by the end of this episode, I’ll make at least a few listeners whom wouldn’t ordinarily classify themselves as liberal, think twice about the matter, before mumbling, “Yeah, yeah. Okay, I guess I’m one of them too.”
Especially since the inception of Fox News in ‘96, and in conjunction with right-wing talk radio heads like Rush Limbaugh, the term liberal has been regularly bastardized in this country, to the point where many liberal-leaners refer to themselves as moderates. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard right-wing talking heads utter the following quotes:
- “Liberalism is evil.”
- “Liberals want to take away your guns.”
- “Liberalism is a mental disorder.”
- “Liberals are going to raise your taxes.”
- “Liberalism. Find a cure.”
Not only that, conservatives and Republicans have consistently associated the term liberal with the following words, which tend to hold a negative connotation: communism, socialism, Marxism, baby-killers, tax and spend, etc.
The actual definition of liberal, courtesy of Merriam-Webster: generous and open-minded.
The mainstream media hasn’t been helping matters any either. When discussing the Democratic primary, talk about whether or not Democratic candidates have moved too far left, or are in essence too liberal, is discussed more often than cars take left turns at the Daytona 500. What they all fail to realize, though, is that when you look at the individual issues, this country is far more liberal than many would have you believe.
Americans’ Ideology (Gallup)
1992
Moderate: 43%
Conservative: 36%
Liberal: 17%
2018
Moderate: 35% (-8%)
Conservative: 35% (-1%)
Liberal: 26% (+9%)
Americans on Specific Issues
- 92% support requiring background checks for firearms purchases (Gallup, October 2018)
- 83% support giving DREAMers who have met certain requirements a chance to become U.S. citizens (Gallup, January 27th 2019)
- 81% support giving illegal immigrants who have met certain requirements a chance to become U.S. citizens (Gallup, January 27th 2019)
- 79% favor abortions being legal in any or some circumstances (Gallup, May 2018)
- 76% support increased taxes on the rich (POLITICO/Morning Consult, February 4th 2019)
- 75% support adding a Constitutional amendment to overturn Citizens United (Voice of the People, May 2018)
- 69% support stricter gun laws (Reuters/Ipsos, February 8th 2019)
- 68% support raising the legal age to purchase a firearm (Gallup, October 2018)
- 67% support gay marriage rights (Gallup, May 2018)
- 66% support marijuana legalization (Gallup, October 22nd 2018)
- 63% support automatic voter registration (Gallup, August 22nd 2016)
- 62% believe the government is doing too little to combat climate-change (Gallup, March 29th 2018)
- 61% support strong or moderate gun restrictions (Gallup, October 2018)
- 56% support Medicare-for-All (Kaiser, April 24th 2019)
- 56% support banning the sale of semi-automatics (Gallup, October 2018)
This negative branding of the term liberal is similar to that of Obamacare. In a February 7th 2017 New York Times poll, while the Affordable Care Act, which is actually the official name of “Obamacare,” polled in positive territory (+4), Obamacare polled at slightly under water (-1). No matter what one calls it, while Republicans’ negative branding of the law was effective at the outset, that effectiveness has begun to wane, especially since, ironically enough, Obama left office. According to Kaiser tracking polls (12/19/18), in March of 2014, the Affordable Care Act was at a net -15 approval rating. It was at an even par when President Obama left office. As of November 2018, the law had a net +13 approval, as 53% approved and 40% disapproved. Hopefully we see such a trend with regard to liberalism as well.
Segueing from that, believe it or not, the Democratic Party has not always been the liberal party and the Republican Party has not always been the conservative party. Democrats used to be conservative and Republicans used to be liberal. This is why it always baffles me when modern-day Republicans call themselves the party of Lincoln and Democrats the party of the KKK. Check the history books. The GOP used to embrace the “liberal” label to a far greater extent than did Democrats. The Republican Party slowly started trending more conservative in the 1930s until, in 1964, when Democrat Lyndon B. Johnson signed the Civil Rights Act, the transformation became complete. “Dixiecrats,” as they were known, left their party to join Republicans; liberals left the GOP to become Democrats; and the solid blue South became redder than a blushing Satan after falling asleep in a tanning bed. So when modern-day Republicans play the Party-History card, they’re not telling the whole story. Hell, they’re not even telling half the story, for regardless of party name, liberals have always been liberals and conservatives have always been conservatives. The so-called KKK-loving Democratic Party of the past is the Republican Party of today and the liberal slave-freeing Abraham Lincoln was a Republican in yesteryear, but would undoubtedly be a Democrat today.
Keeping all of what I just talked about in mind, I’m now going to read to you a Letterman-like Top Ten List I concocted. Here are the Top Ten Signs You’re NOT a Liberal. Again, that’s Top Ten Signs You’re NOT a Liberal.
The Top Ten Signs You’re NOT A Liberal
10. You believe in nothing larger than yourself, besides the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man version of Shaquille O’Neal.
9. You think Oprah should hand out six cars to every American, including blind people.
8. You believe that when life throws a fist at your face, you should take it smiling and then kiss it.
7. You think nothing illustrates more respect for our troops than doing the hokey-pokey during the National Anthem.
6. You think, when a person is cremated, their ashes should automatically be registered to vote.
5. You started a social movement called “Only Poor Gay Black Female Muslim RuPaul Fan Club Members’ Lives Matter.”
4. You feel that guns are the cause for all of the world’s problems, including: diabetes, herpes, and sword fights.
3. You think everyone’s taxes should be the equivalent of Donald Trump’s 1st Grade English test score - 50%.
2. You believe marriage is between three men, two women, one hermaphrodite, a skyscraper named after a superhero, and a lion named Sourpuss.
1. (drumroll) When filling out a dating site profile, under “hobbies” you write, “Working hard to play hard, long walks on the beach, and having abortions.”
Let’s now move on to a segment I call ELF, which stands for Epic Logic Fail.
ELF (Epic Logic Fail)
Meme: “Liberalism is all about control: control over what you can say; control over what you can read; control over what you can drive; control over what you can eat; control over what you can drink; control over your guns; control over your news; control what you learn; control your healthcare; control your kid’s education.”
Let’s go through these claims one by one…
- “Control over what you can say.”
What, like discouraging use of the n-word and c-word? Yeah, that’s awfully stringent…
- “Control over what you can read.”
They may have a point here. I mean, liberals have tried preventing the public from being able to read the full Mueller Report. Oh, wait, that was the conservatives…
- “Control over what you can drive.”
Say what? You mean trying to manufacture more fuel-efficient and less pollution-inducing automobiles, which benefit both the environment and people’s wallets, and providing said vehicles as an option? Okay then…
- “Control over what you can eat.”
No, we just want to keep in tact FDA regulations so fewer people die. We’re monsters like that.
- “Control over what you can drink.”
Yeah, Flint water is bad. Next…
- “Control over your guns.”
It shouldn’t be easier to purchase firearms than Sudafed. Period. More like exclamation point!
- “Control over your news.”
The fact that the propaganda-spewing Fox News Channel is in existence at all disproves this point. There’s a good reason why Fox News sounds so similar to Fake News.
- “Control what you learn.”
How is this one even possible?
Teacher: “What did you learn today?”
Student: “That the capital city of New Jersey is Trenton.”
Teacher: “No, you didn’t. Let me tell you what you learned…”
I don’t think so…
- “Control your healthcare.”
Providing people who didn’t before have healthcare with health insurance is controlling their healthcare? So according to them, no healthcare is better than healthcare, because with healthcare, we’ve given all control to the government, but without healthcare, we have firm control over the healthcare we don’t have? Yeah, that makes sense…
- “Control over your kid’s education.”
Yes, because teaching facts over debunked conspiracies has always been a bad thing…
Liberals don’t want to control people’s behavior. They (We) simply want to provide better and healthier options; educate; and then allow people to make decisions for themselves. What this conservative meme essentially says is that if a vehicle isn’t safety-checked and a person doesn’t believe a blind, five-time drunk driver should be able to legally drive this automobile, he or she is a liberal and trying to control you. If anyone’s about control, it’s conservatives. Just ask women’s vaginas.
Before I wrap things up, I’d like to share with you a segment I call From Snark to Finish.
From Snark to Finish
If you take just one thing from this episode with you, let it be this. If you want people to be healthy and happy, you’re evil. If you believe in The Golden Rule, you’re part of a cult. If you want fewer people to die of gun violence, you’re a sinner. If you allow science, reason, and facts to dictate your opinions, you have a mental illness. In order to be good, decent, patriotic, and holy, you must consistently utter that which isn’t true. You must falsely believe all planets revolve around you. You must believe benevolent and Jewish Jesus builds walls to prevent fellow non-whites from entering, all the while holding an AR-15, an AK-47, and looking straight into a camera, saying, “If this robe and these sandals don’t tell you how much I love capitalism, I don’t know what will!”
Close
…and that’s where we’ll end things on today’s episode. Join me next week when we’ll be talking about… something else. Until then, be sure to check me out at… Pod Bean (I Feel Snitty), https://twitter.com/craigrozniecki?lang=en (Twitter), https://thekind-heartedsmartaleck.blogspot.com/ (blog), and https://www.amazon.com/Craig-Rozniecki/e/B00JBQ95LO (Amazon/books). This has been I Feel Snitty with Craig Rozniecki, letting you know that if you order a hamberder, be sure to ask for a healthy side of covfefe. Take care.
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