Skip to main content

Santorum insinuates that liberals talk about abortion while showering

As seems to be typical, Rick Santorum had some interesting choice words recently when giving a speech to the anti-abortion group Students for Life.

During this speech, Santorum said the following:

"They (pro-choice liberals) make it uncomfortable for students who come to Austin to shower at a Young Men's Christian Association, YMCA, gym, because they live it. They're passionate, they're willing to do and say uncomfortable things in mixed company. They're willing to make the sacrifice at their business because they care enough."

Either Santorum has been to some unusual showers and gyms, the man is full of garbage, or he's doing shrooms again. I'm going to guess it's either the second or third option, but am leaning toward the second. When reading this quote by Santorum, I was greeted with these lovely visuals:

Setting: Students in Austin showering at a Young Men's Christian Association

Heath Greatness: "Jesus loves me, this I know..."

Sherlock High: "For the Bible tells me so..."

Paul Altar: "Yes, Jesus loves me..."

Heath: "You skipped a part, Paul."

Paul: "Sorry about that. I got some soap in my eyes again. Why do I keep on doing that?"

Sherlock: "I'll pray for you, Paul."

Paul: "Thanks. I appreciate it."

Tyrell Ninja: "I love abortion."

Heath, Sherlock, and Paul: ::silence::

Tyrell: "Are you guys still there? You don't need to answer that. I know you are. I'm not even showering, since I'm fully clothed, and am just watching you guys. So, did you guys hear me?"

Heath, Sherlock, and Paul: ::silence::

Tyrell: "I'll take that as a yes. Hey, it's a woman's body and her choice. None of us have vaginas. Why should we be making that choice for them?"

Heath, Sherlock, and Paul: ::run away, screaming, "We'll pray for you!"::

Tyrell: "Ha! I tell ya, there's nothing a straight man likes more than to talk about abortion with a bunch of naked dudes in a shower."


Setting: Guys playing basketball in a gym

Michael Boredom: "Pass it! I'm open! I'm open!"

Larry Curd: "You've been open all game! You suck!"

Michael: "Oh, shutup! I'm just having an off-game."

Bill Pampier: "So, are you gonna take it to the rim or not, Larry? I'll even give you a lane to make your move. Are you ready?"

Larry: "Oh, you're going to do that, are you? You'll regret it!"

Bill: "Crap! Well, you got lucky that time."

Larry: "I've been getting lucky all game apparently."

Dennis Hodgeman: "So, my girlfriend had an abortion last night. We know some people will judge us, but believe it's our right - especially her's - to make that choice."

Bill: "What the hell, Dennis? We're just talking trash and playing basketball over here!"

Dennis: "Whatever. Every time I get a rebound, I'm going to yell out, 'abortion!' Like it or not, that's what I'm gonna do!"

Bill: "Fine then. You're on my team and I'm not going to let you get any rebounds. What do you think about that?"

Michael: "Hey, Larry, what's going on here? Are we playing against these two and they're playing against each other?"

Larry: "It looks that way. Here, I'll even pass the ball to you this time. You should be able to make that easy lay-up."

Dennis: ::rebounds the ball:: "Abortion! Ha-ha! Yeah!"

Bill: "Oh, you're going to get it!"

Dennis: ::runs around with the ball:: "Abortion! Abortion! Abortion! You can't catch me! Abortion!"


Yeah, Mr. Santorum may want to go to new showers or gyms - that or come up with yet another crazy story. I have no doubt that he will.
 
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/08/07/rick-santorum-showers_n_3718618.html

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun...

Trump's Lie Tally at the CNN Debate

1) "We had the greatest economy in the history of our country. We had never done so well. Every – everybody was amazed by it. Other countries were copying us." 2) "But the thing we never got the credit for, and we should have, is getting us out of that COVID mess." 3) "The only jobs he created are for illegal immigrants and bounceback jobs; they’re bounced back from the COVID." 4) "Not going to drive them higher. It’s just going to cause countries that have been ripping us off for years, like China and many others, in all fairness to China – it’s going to just force them to pay us a lot of money, reduce our deficit tremendously, and give us a lot of power for other things." (tariffs) 5) "He also said he inherited 9 percent inflation." 6) "No, he inherited almost no inflation and it stayed that way for 14 months. And then it blew up under his leadership, because they spent money like a bunch of people that didn’t know what t...