...and the winner for best child according to Facebook goes to...

As long-time readers would know, I've had a long-time love/hate relationship with social media, Facebook in particular. While I absolutely love being able to keep in regular touch with friends and family on the site, there are definitely some times where I want nothing to do with it. Mother's Day is one of the days where I try to stray as far away from Facebook as possible. Is it just me or does it seem like, on Mother's Day, most of the Facebook world is attempting to suggest they're the best kid in the world?

- "Look what I did for my mom? I put on these gloves and make it look like I'm going to do some yard-work, but really, I'm about to lift some dumbbells while watching America's Most Wanted. I'm the best kid in the world!"

- "I put forth the hard work to take a picture of this great meal my mom cooked, but will refrain from giving her credit, in order to make others think I was the one who did it. So I'm the best kid!"

- "Look how happy my mom and I are in this selfie I took?!? We both smiled for at least one Mississippi, before we started arguing about politics again. So, apparently, I'm the best kid!"

My all-time favorite such posts (or least favorite depending on how you look at it) are the ones that say, "My mom doesn't have Facebook, but I wanted to tell her Happy Mother's Day anyway!"

I know what the intent is of such a message. These individuals want to give off the impression they're good, loving children. But what does the message actually indicate? Simply that acceptance from Facebook friends and the potential illusion of a close friendship with family is of greater importance than actually having a close relationship with said family. When one thinks about it, of what point is there to tell someone Happy Mother's Day on Facebook when she doesn't have Facebook? How will she get the message? Will the author of the post call his/her mother in order to say, "I know you don't have an account, but I wished you a Happy Mother's Day on Facebook"? Wouldn't it be easier to just call and tell the person over the phone, or in person if she's within driving distance? While we're at it, we might as well say/do the following:

- "My mom doesn't have a phone, but I'm going to call her to wish her a Happy Mother's Day anyway!"

- "My mom doesn't have a computer and still isn't sure what a smart-phone is, but I think I'm going to call her landline and ask if she wants to Skype, you know, for Mother's Day."

- "I've got a great idea! For Mother's Day, I'm going to make reservations at my mom's favorite restaurant! So even though she's without a license, or a car, and is blind, I'm going to ask her to drive up to meet me there!"

As for me, I actually told my mom Happy Mother's Day in person, spent time with her, and didn't feel the need to garner acceptance from the Facebook world about it, because I'm crazy like that or something...

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun

The difference between "looking" and "checking out"

I may be way off with these numbers, but it's my approximation that at least 75% of individuals whom are involved in a serious relationship feel it's perfectly acceptable to "check out" members of the opposite sex they're not involved with. Meanwhile, approximately 25% either don't feel this is acceptable or aren't sure about the matter. I hadn't thought about this matter for a while, but since I've been dating a woman for about 8 months, the topic has been pondered about some. When reading or hearing others discuss this very issue, I often times hear comments similar to the following: "It's human nature to look." "There's nothing wrong with checking others out. I'm sure he/she does it too!" "It's fine to do it. Just don't tell your boyfriend/girlfriend about it or do it in front of them!" "It's natural to find people attractive." When observing the array of comments, I i

The verdict is in. To no one's surprise, Jonathan Hoenig has been found guilty of being an idiot.

Just recently, when discussing the Michael Brown shooting and whether or not race had anything to do with it, Fox News contributor Jonathan Hoenig said, "You know who talks about race? Racists." One moment while I provide Mr. Hoenig with the well deserved slow-clap. :: slow-claps for two seconds :: So, that was quite the line by Mr. Hoenig, wasn't it? "You know who talks about race? Racists." Well, wasn't he just talking about race? So, by his own words, I guess that makes him a racist. Also, if he wants to be consistent, does this mean that people whom talk about gender are sexists and people whom talk about sexual orientation are homophobes? With that line of thinking, Hoenig would engage in the following back-and-forths: Hoenig: "So, who are you voting for?" A woman: "The Democratic candidate, because he's been adamant about his support for equal rights for women." Hoenig: "You sexist feminist nazi!"

The Kind-Hearted Smart Aleck

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