I just read an article by one Melanie Curtin entitled "Ten Things to Avoid When Hitting On Me," which I found to be, I'll say "interesting."
When first glancing at the article, I immediately thought to myself, "Is this young woman publishing a strange personal ad of some kind here?" I'm curious how many responses she gets from males whom tell her, "Ooh, pick me! Pick me! Give me a chance! I don't do any of these ten things!"
What are these ten things?
10. Don't neg.: "In other words, it works on women who suffer from low self-esteem. This means that in fact, negging is manipulative, underhanded, and in some cases downright mean.
I, on the other hand, will not respond well to you insulting my outfit, hair or drink of choice. Not only is it annoying, it makes it screamingly obvious that you are trying to run game on me... which is really not going to work."
Yeah, speaking of annoying - the word "negging" fits that description to a T.
9. Don't lead with your money: "I don't really care how much money you make or what kind of car you drive. I mean, I care, but I don't care that much."
She cares about this, but doesn't. I'm glad we got that cleared up. Next...
8. Don't put yourself down: "Finally, don't kill the mystery. Give me a chance to figure out that you suck on my own. Seriously -- we all have things we suck at. In fact, true intimacy is getting an insider's glimpse into the things someone else sucks at and accepting them anyway."
Hmm... So part of the fun of dating to this woman is figuring out how much the guy "sucks." This personal ad is going very well. She could have written, "Looking for - a guy who sucks, but doesn't tell me he sucks, so I can figure out just how much he sucks on his own." That's sweet.
7. Don't get handsy: "Seriously? I just told you I'm a sex and dating coach. Do you really think I haven't read The Game?"
Ah, is that the one on which the film with Michael Douglas and Sean Penn was based? Oh, I'm being told that's a different one. Sorry about that. Please continue...
6. Don't coddle me because I'm a girl: "Don't assume I don't like whiskey or that I don't know anything about cars because I'm a girl.
Now, I happen to hate whiskey and know next to nothing about cars -- but I don't like you assuming this is true. Doing so makes you look closed-minded and occasionally misogynistic. Get to know me before you jump to conclusions -- I'm smart, sarcastic, sweet, well-meaning, unsure, and racy. Yes, some of those are paradoxical. Hi. Have you met me? I'm a woman."
So, this woman basically implies that her gender doesn't make a lot of sense here. She's really beginning to make a great case for guys to walk on over and hit on her, isn't she? Let's see where her mind wanders to next...
5. Don't make fun of my friends: "Plus, I live and die by my friends. I'm fiercely loyal and you trying to dis them isn't going to earn you any favors -- in fact, you'll be lucky to emerge unscathed. My wit is as sharp as the talons I wear on these dainty little feet of mine, and you don't want to be on the receiving end of either one."
I find this difficult to believe. Since she was alive enough to write this article, I have a difficult time believing she "lives" and "dies" by her friends. This is hypothetically possible, of course. However, since I'm not Mr. Cleo (if there even is one), I am unable to see into this young lady's future, outside of the fact it appears as if she may become an ultimate fighter before too terribly long. Remind me to wear a helmet, cup, and pads all over my body if I ever bump into her.
4. Don't leave your sexuality at the door: "The truth is, you making me feel comfortable will usually make me so 'comfortable' that I miss the fact that you're dtf. Because when you act all buddy buddy with me, I assume you just want to be my buddy.
Nobody wants to fu*k Mr. Nice Guy. So stop being him if you want to fu*k."
Ah, I see. Well, call it a hunch, but I'm guessing most "nice guys" wouldn't want to f**k this writer in the first place, especially after reading that her "wit is as sharp as the talons I wear on these dainty little feet of mine, and you don't want to be on the receiving end of either one." That deserves a "thanks, but no thanks" from most nice guys.
3. Don't try to make me laugh: "It's not that I don't want you to make me laugh -- it's that I don't want you to try to make me laugh."
Okay. Let me get this straight here. The title of this gem is, "Don't try to make me laugh." The writer then states, "It's not that I don't want you to make me laugh -- it's that I don't want you to try to make me laugh." Fascinating.
2. Don't be cocky: "I don't care if you bench 300 lbs, hang out with famous people, or pick up models."
Well, if a guy can bench 300 lbs., chances are he could pick up most models, even of the plus-size variety...
1. Don't take it personally if I say no: "You could avoid all nine of these other tips and still get shut down. It happens all the time. And it sucks -- I'm not going to sugarcoat that. In fact, I have mad respect for men who hit on women -- you're 20 times better than the guy who stands in the corner and does nothing. Even if you do everything wrong, I salute you for being a man."
Being a man, eh? What does it take to be a man anyway? Perhaps this angry lady should concoct a top ten list on what it takes to be a man. Judging by her list in this article, I'm not sure what to expect.
So, okay guys, when hitting on Ms. Curtin, you mustn't be nice, but can't be cocky either. You must not try to make her laugh, well, kind of. Similarly, you can't lead with your money, even though it means something to her, so it could still be effective in a way. You can't be negative about anyone or anything, even though it's inevitable that everyone "sucks" in a way and part of the fun is discovering that "suckiness" of a person. Don't touch her much even if she touches you. Also, don't hold it against her that she's a woman and doesn't make any sense apparently (as she implied about her gender). Lastly, if she turns you down, be a "man" about it, smile from ear to ear, thank her for the lovely conversation most likely about kicking men in the balls, and say, "I hope we can be friends."
Yeah, oddly enough, this same author wrote an article not too long ago, entitled, "Why I'm Not Married." I'm thinking she could have just copied this top ten list, pasted it underneath that title, and it'd give readers a pretty good idea of why she's still single.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/melanie-curtin/ten-things-to-avoid-when-_b_3447210.html
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/melanie-curtin/why-im-not-married_b_1266872.html
When first glancing at the article, I immediately thought to myself, "Is this young woman publishing a strange personal ad of some kind here?" I'm curious how many responses she gets from males whom tell her, "Ooh, pick me! Pick me! Give me a chance! I don't do any of these ten things!"
What are these ten things?
10. Don't neg.: "In other words, it works on women who suffer from low self-esteem. This means that in fact, negging is manipulative, underhanded, and in some cases downright mean.
I, on the other hand, will not respond well to you insulting my outfit, hair or drink of choice. Not only is it annoying, it makes it screamingly obvious that you are trying to run game on me... which is really not going to work."
Yeah, speaking of annoying - the word "negging" fits that description to a T.
9. Don't lead with your money: "I don't really care how much money you make or what kind of car you drive. I mean, I care, but I don't care that much."
She cares about this, but doesn't. I'm glad we got that cleared up. Next...
8. Don't put yourself down: "Finally, don't kill the mystery. Give me a chance to figure out that you suck on my own. Seriously -- we all have things we suck at. In fact, true intimacy is getting an insider's glimpse into the things someone else sucks at and accepting them anyway."
Hmm... So part of the fun of dating to this woman is figuring out how much the guy "sucks." This personal ad is going very well. She could have written, "Looking for - a guy who sucks, but doesn't tell me he sucks, so I can figure out just how much he sucks on his own." That's sweet.
7. Don't get handsy: "Seriously? I just told you I'm a sex and dating coach. Do you really think I haven't read The Game?"
Ah, is that the one on which the film with Michael Douglas and Sean Penn was based? Oh, I'm being told that's a different one. Sorry about that. Please continue...
6. Don't coddle me because I'm a girl: "Don't assume I don't like whiskey or that I don't know anything about cars because I'm a girl.
Now, I happen to hate whiskey and know next to nothing about cars -- but I don't like you assuming this is true. Doing so makes you look closed-minded and occasionally misogynistic. Get to know me before you jump to conclusions -- I'm smart, sarcastic, sweet, well-meaning, unsure, and racy. Yes, some of those are paradoxical. Hi. Have you met me? I'm a woman."
So, this woman basically implies that her gender doesn't make a lot of sense here. She's really beginning to make a great case for guys to walk on over and hit on her, isn't she? Let's see where her mind wanders to next...
5. Don't make fun of my friends: "Plus, I live and die by my friends. I'm fiercely loyal and you trying to dis them isn't going to earn you any favors -- in fact, you'll be lucky to emerge unscathed. My wit is as sharp as the talons I wear on these dainty little feet of mine, and you don't want to be on the receiving end of either one."
I find this difficult to believe. Since she was alive enough to write this article, I have a difficult time believing she "lives" and "dies" by her friends. This is hypothetically possible, of course. However, since I'm not Mr. Cleo (if there even is one), I am unable to see into this young lady's future, outside of the fact it appears as if she may become an ultimate fighter before too terribly long. Remind me to wear a helmet, cup, and pads all over my body if I ever bump into her.
4. Don't leave your sexuality at the door: "The truth is, you making me feel comfortable will usually make me so 'comfortable' that I miss the fact that you're dtf. Because when you act all buddy buddy with me, I assume you just want to be my buddy.
Nobody wants to fu*k Mr. Nice Guy. So stop being him if you want to fu*k."
Ah, I see. Well, call it a hunch, but I'm guessing most "nice guys" wouldn't want to f**k this writer in the first place, especially after reading that her "wit is as sharp as the talons I wear on these dainty little feet of mine, and you don't want to be on the receiving end of either one." That deserves a "thanks, but no thanks" from most nice guys.
3. Don't try to make me laugh: "It's not that I don't want you to make me laugh -- it's that I don't want you to try to make me laugh."
Okay. Let me get this straight here. The title of this gem is, "Don't try to make me laugh." The writer then states, "It's not that I don't want you to make me laugh -- it's that I don't want you to try to make me laugh." Fascinating.
2. Don't be cocky: "I don't care if you bench 300 lbs, hang out with famous people, or pick up models."
Well, if a guy can bench 300 lbs., chances are he could pick up most models, even of the plus-size variety...
1. Don't take it personally if I say no: "You could avoid all nine of these other tips and still get shut down. It happens all the time. And it sucks -- I'm not going to sugarcoat that. In fact, I have mad respect for men who hit on women -- you're 20 times better than the guy who stands in the corner and does nothing. Even if you do everything wrong, I salute you for being a man."
Being a man, eh? What does it take to be a man anyway? Perhaps this angry lady should concoct a top ten list on what it takes to be a man. Judging by her list in this article, I'm not sure what to expect.
So, okay guys, when hitting on Ms. Curtin, you mustn't be nice, but can't be cocky either. You must not try to make her laugh, well, kind of. Similarly, you can't lead with your money, even though it means something to her, so it could still be effective in a way. You can't be negative about anyone or anything, even though it's inevitable that everyone "sucks" in a way and part of the fun is discovering that "suckiness" of a person. Don't touch her much even if she touches you. Also, don't hold it against her that she's a woman and doesn't make any sense apparently (as she implied about her gender). Lastly, if she turns you down, be a "man" about it, smile from ear to ear, thank her for the lovely conversation most likely about kicking men in the balls, and say, "I hope we can be friends."
Yeah, oddly enough, this same author wrote an article not too long ago, entitled, "Why I'm Not Married." I'm thinking she could have just copied this top ten list, pasted it underneath that title, and it'd give readers a pretty good idea of why she's still single.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/melanie-curtin/ten-things-to-avoid-when-_b_3447210.html
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/melanie-curtin/why-im-not-married_b_1266872.html
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