Skip to main content

Got E.D.?

We can't say it, can we guys? It's now even being abbreviated on commercials, because we can't deal with it.

Have E.D.? Cialis may be right for you! Potential side effects are: Heart burn, liver cancer, heart attack, suffocation, loss of blood and death. In extreme cases, fellas may get permanent boners. If that is the case, seek medical attention immediately.

That's right, E.D. is the shortened version of Erectile Dysfunction. Guys just can't say it, can they?

"Hey baby, I have erectile dysfunction. That's right, but I'm on Cialis, so all is well."

No, it's "I had a problem with E.D., but thanks to Cialis, things are going great again! My wife is happy! I'm happy! All thanks to Cialis!"

I'm tired of the euphemistic jargon and sugar-coating. Just say it! They need to come out with a blunt version of commercials like these, such as this one:

"You know, I keep trying, trying and trying. My wife is getting frustrated with me. Why? Because I can't get it up. We've looked into Kama Sutra, toys, anything and everything you could possibly think of, but I just can't maintain an erection. It just goes limp on me. It's embarrassing. I just don't feel like a man anymore. I'm afraid that because I can't get it up, my wife is going to head elsewhere for sexual satisfaction. But now, my worries are over, because I've found Cialis! I can get it up any time and every time with Cialis! Yeah, I look a little funny walking around the grocery story with an obvious erection staring straight up at me for four to five hours, but it's all worth it, because now my wife is happy and I don't have to worry about her going elsewhere! Thanks Cialis!"

Now, that'd be a lot more informative than just referring to the situation as E.D. I hope they read my blog someday and come out with a better and more comedic effort next time. I won't get my hopes up (pun intended), but I'll be keeping my eyes and ears open for Cialis, Levitra and Viagra commercials.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun...

The difference between "looking" and "checking out"

I may be way off with these numbers, but it's my approximation that at least 75% of individuals whom are involved in a serious relationship feel it's perfectly acceptable to "check out" members of the opposite sex they're not involved with. Meanwhile, approximately 25% either don't feel this is acceptable or aren't sure about the matter. I hadn't thought about this matter for a while, but since I've been dating a woman for about 8 months, the topic has been pondered about some. When reading or hearing others discuss this very issue, I often times hear comments similar to the following: "It's human nature to look." "There's nothing wrong with checking others out. I'm sure he/she does it too!" "It's fine to do it. Just don't tell your boyfriend/girlfriend about it or do it in front of them!" "It's natural to find people attractive." When observing the array of comments, I i...