Skip to main content

...and now a word from Republicans on Democrats

More and more, it appears as if Republicans have garnered a false image of the Democratic Party as a whole. I think this has a lot to do with what is being spewed to them by conservative media outlets, such as Rush Limbaugh on talk radio and anybody not named Shepard Smith on Fox News. Whenever I've heard 98.4% of them throw an insult at the Democratic Party and I've asked them to justify the statement with hard-core evidence, I haven't received even a shred of evidence. It's starting to seem as if many of these people are taking bumper-sticker slogans and catchy talking points way too literally. I'm not thinking a prosecuting attorney would win many court cases if, when called upon to showcase evidence of the defendant's guilt, he or she told the judge, "I saw it on a bumper sticker, your honor" or "Rush Limbaugh told me it was true." On that note, I'll now list my five favorite insults that I consistently hear Republicans hurl at the Democratic Party, and have some fun with them.

Communists - I'm thinking this derives from the term pinko. The Democratic Party is typically supportive of gay rights. Perhaps these Republicans feel that all gay men wear pink, which naturally prompts them to call Democrats pinkos or communists. From this point forward, the Republican Party will start a new trend when it comes to their fight against gay marriage rights. Instead of laying claim that gay marriage would ruin the sanctity of marriage, they'll just go around calling any gay marriage supporter a commie.

Moochers - Yes, all Democrats are moochers off the federal government. This would include billionaires Bill Gates and Warren Buffett, Hollywood stars Brad Pitt and George Clooney, as well as Republican seniors with Social Security and Medicare. When the two richest men in the U.S. (Gates and Buffett) were asked what the single biggest factor was in their becoming billionaires, they immediately and simultaneously shouted, "Food stamps."

Marxists - In a Clockwork Orange-type setting, millions of Republicans were shown images of Democratic leaders - past and present - in a negative light, while Richard Marx's hit song "Right Here Waiting" was placed on repeat. Whenever the song comes on the radio, 74.3% of these very Republicans have to pull over to the side of the road, take some painkillers, and yell obscenities about Democrats and Richard Marx. Whenever they see a Democrat in person or on television, the same result occurs. Television sales have plummeted as a result, but surprisingly, Richard Marx CDs are making a comeback - rumor has it, among Democrats, as well as teenagers with Republican parents.

Baby-killers - Apparently, there are a number of pro-gun control Democrats in Congress whom spend most of their time traveling to hospitals with AK-47s and open fire on newborn babies. In response, many Republicans in Congress are attempting to pass a bill that would require all newborn babies to be armed with at least one handgun, a rocket launcher, grenades and an Ayn Rand book. In light of this, Hollywood is in the process of making the films Look Who's Shooting, Look Who's Shooting Too, and Look Who's Shooting Now.

Socialists - This may be the most popular Republican insult for Democrats at this current juncture. The majority of Republicans nowadays tend to place war before diplomacy in regard to resolving issues with other nations. The majority of Democrats are the direct opposite and tend to place diplomacy before war in regard to resolving issues with other nations. This has prompted many Republicans to see Democrats as less manly than Lance Bass dressed in drag. So, since many Republicans believe the Democratic Party is being too social with other nations instead of bombing the ever living hell out of them and growing some hair on their chest as a result while grunting more than Monica Seles during sex, they've resorted to calling Democrats socialists. When asked what they call themselves in regard to how they'd like to deal with other nations, an overwhelming majority of Republicans said, "Big Dickists."

http://www.forbes.com/forbes-400/gallery

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun

The difference between "looking" and "checking out"

I may be way off with these numbers, but it's my approximation that at least 75% of individuals whom are involved in a serious relationship feel it's perfectly acceptable to "check out" members of the opposite sex they're not involved with. Meanwhile, approximately 25% either don't feel this is acceptable or aren't sure about the matter. I hadn't thought about this matter for a while, but since I've been dating a woman for about 8 months, the topic has been pondered about some. When reading or hearing others discuss this very issue, I often times hear comments similar to the following: "It's human nature to look." "There's nothing wrong with checking others out. I'm sure he/she does it too!" "It's fine to do it. Just don't tell your boyfriend/girlfriend about it or do it in front of them!" "It's natural to find people attractive." When observing the array of comments, I i

The verdict is in. To no one's surprise, Jonathan Hoenig has been found guilty of being an idiot.

Just recently, when discussing the Michael Brown shooting and whether or not race had anything to do with it, Fox News contributor Jonathan Hoenig said, "You know who talks about race? Racists." One moment while I provide Mr. Hoenig with the well deserved slow-clap. :: slow-claps for two seconds :: So, that was quite the line by Mr. Hoenig, wasn't it? "You know who talks about race? Racists." Well, wasn't he just talking about race? So, by his own words, I guess that makes him a racist. Also, if he wants to be consistent, does this mean that people whom talk about gender are sexists and people whom talk about sexual orientation are homophobes? With that line of thinking, Hoenig would engage in the following back-and-forths: Hoenig: "So, who are you voting for?" A woman: "The Democratic candidate, because he's been adamant about his support for equal rights for women." Hoenig: "You sexist feminist nazi!"