Skip to main content

"How to Distort History" brought to you by the GOP

In a move that appears to be trending nationwide, the Jefferson County School Board in Colorado is set to vote on a policy proposal which would, in essence, alter the course of history. This led hundreds of high school students in the Denver metro area to protest by walking out of classrooms this past Tuesday.

What is this proposal exactly? Carimah Townes of ThinkProgress reported the following:

"...the Jefferson County School Board in Colorado would restrict history education to subject matter that 'promote[s] citizenship, patriotism, essentials and benefits of the free-market system, respect for authority and respect for individuals rights.'

According to the curricula proposal, students would only be taught lessons depicting American heritage in a positive light, and effectively ban any material that could lead to dissent. Under the proposed policy, a review committee would regularly read instructional text and course syllabi to ensure that educational materials do not stray from subject matter that complies with the policy."

Die-hard conservative politicians crack me up. They contend that the United States is the greatest country in the history of the world, yet our government, of which they're a part, is evil. They also seem to contend that anyone whom doesn't feel our country is perfect is unpatriotic. So, to sum up, they think a country led by corrupt leaders is perfect and anyone who speaks up to these imperfect leaders about flaws within the country is unpatriotic. ...and now, they want to distort America's "perfect" history to our children in schools so they don't become more prone to questioning our imperfect authority figures about our "perfect" country. Sure, that makes sense...

I wonder what a cop, prosecuting attorney, judge, and jury would think about these conservatives' altering-history tactics...

Prosecuting attorney Fredrique Gotcha: "So, an eye witness says he saw you choke your girlfriend and cuss her out as you fought over the last breadstick at an Olive Garden. Is that correct?"

Mike Koch: "He said that?"

Gotcha: "Yes, he said that. Was what he said correct?"

Koch: "Let's just say I was giving my wife the Heimlich maneuver..."

Gotcha: "By choking her?"

Koch: "That's how we learned it in my family."

Gotcha: "The witness also said, as you were choking her, you told her to, 'Spit out that breadstick like you spit everything else out, you f**king b**ch.' Is that correct?"

Koch: "That's just because I was concerned for her well-being. I was being a loving boyfriend."

Gotcha: "The eye witness also said that you then screamed out, 'I'm going to kill you! I'm going to kill you! You ate my breadstick! Die, greedy b**ch, die! Is that correct?"

Koch: "We were just playing a little game. It's what we always do when we go out to eat. We like to act out and entertain the other patrons."

Gotcha: "I see... So, according to you, while you were telling your wife to die, you were giving her the Heimlich maneuver and trying to save her life, before playing an improv-type of game and telling her to die again. Is that correct?"

Koch: "Is that what I told you?"

Gotcha: "Yes"

Koch: "Well, then, yes - I'll go with that!"

Gotcha: "Fantastic... You do know you can get unlimited breadsticks at Olive Garden, right?"

Koch: "Yeah, I know that now. I guess I choked her for nothing then, I mean, played a game with her for nothing."

Gotcha: "Nice try, buddy. Busted!"

Koch: "Seriously! I get the words 'choke' and 'game' mixed up all the time!"

Gotcha: "Uh-huh..."

Koch: "I've got proof! Let me just write it down in a diary and date it back a few years. Can I go and do that now?"

Judge Judy Cumonow: "Oh, for f**k's sake..."

http://thinkprogress.org/justice/2014/09/24/3571362/student-protest-denver/

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun...

Face guarding is legal in college football and the NFL

I just wanted to remind fans and announcers especially, that face guarding is legal in both college football and the NFL. It all comes down to contact. So long as a defender doesn't make contact with an intended receiver, he doesn't have to turn around to play the ball. I can't tell you how many times every week I hear announcers talk about face guarding being a penalty. It's not. I even heard one announcer yesterday state, "If the defender doesn't turn around and play the ball, the ref will call pass interference every time." That's simply not true. Courtesy of referee Bill LeMonnier, he says this with regard to the rule at the college level (answered on 8/12/13): "NCAA rules on pass interference require the face guarding to have contact to be a foul. No contact, no foul by NCAA rules." In the NFL rule book, this is written:  "Actions that constitute defensive pass interference include but are not limited to: (a) Contact by a ...