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What I learned in Week 2 of the NFL season

In Week 2 of the NFL season, I learned that...

- ..., in giving the ball away four times and getting penalized sixteen others for a total of 118 yards, San Francisco celebrates Christmas on September 14th of every year - for which the Chicago Bears are very thankful.

- ...Rex Ryan may give Marty Mornhinweg a series of timeouts for illegally calling a timeout against the Green Bay Packers, which negated a touchdown and may have potentially cost his team the game.

- ...Houston Texans coaches have laid out the following strategy for quarterback Ryan Fitzpatrick - "Just don't be pick-six Schaub."

- ..."Donkey Kong" Suh won't be inviting Cam Newton over for a party anytime soon.

- ...New York Giants players and coaches are attempting to come up with new translations to the phrase "TO-prone Giants." To this point, the leading suggestions are: "Testicular overreach-prone Giants," "Tequila overdose-prone Giants," or "Touchdown...eh...something-prone Giants."

- ...the "Steel Curtain" in Pittsburgh is looking more like a tissue curtain nowadays.

- ...the New Orleans Saints have started the season 0-2 against teams that finished last year with a combined record of 8-24, so that's certainly something the 11-5 team from a year ago can hang their hats on...

- ...the Jacksonville Jaguars are in some serious trouble if quarterback Chad Henne, who carried the ball 3 times for 17 yards, is the team's leading rusher. Where's Elvis Grbac when you need him?

- ...all it takes is one road loss for people to call the defending Super Bowl champs pretenders, and even if they were to finish 15-1, their season would be all but done.

- ...the Detroit Lions run the ball like a mime runs his mouth - not very well...

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