Rejected By Me? Feel Free to Spread Thy Legs to the Public

In recent months, I've learned of a woman whom I rejected, becoming, for lack of a better word, a slut.

From about May of '09 to September of '10 (16 months), I was talking to one gal, we'll call her Medusa, fairly regularly. When I flew to Omaha in July and again in August of 2010, she and I spent quite a bit of time together. She claimed to have wanted to start a relationship with me and at one point, while drunk, she asked me to go grab some condoms from her purse. No, she wasn't strange and wanted to snack on some latex, but yes, she had a fetish for removing her clothing and spreading her legs as I soon discovered. She and I weren't dating and in the grand scheme of things, hadn't hung out very much, so that moment made me rather uncomfortable. I rejected her easy-access request and asked that she sober up and take me home, because of course, she was my ride and that was the only riding she was going to do that night. After that very evening, she and I began to drift apart. I stopped calling and writing her as much and had my mind made up that I didn't care to associate with her much anymore, let alone date her.

Not long ago, I learned from a friend that Medusa was looser than a toilet seat after being sat on by a sumo wrestler for 36 consecutive days. I guess while she was attempting to persuade me in dating her, she slept with six different guys and on two occasions, had to take the morning-after pill, due to her having not been responsible the night before. Typically, these adult-missionary sleepovers followed my telling her I wasn't sure what I felt or that I didn't think I felt anything stronger than that of a friendship. So, I wasn't even rejecting her so to speak, just saying that I didn't know how I felt and this prompted her to know a man's penis better. Sorry, I should pluralize that - men's penises. There, that is the more accurate assessment. All I can say is thank Valtrex I didn't do anything with her. I'm gagging now having just typed that.

I found this woman’s persistence on getting me to sleep with her rather hilarious, because she knew that I’m about as clean as a nun. Perhaps she felt I was all talk and as a guy, it was just my way of manipulating her into doing the deed of touching each other's naughty parts. In any case, I really have to wonder what was going through her mind after being rejected each and every time by a male for sex. Well, I hate to go, but I think I'm going to celebrate my rejection of STD's by smoking a cigarette.

My podcast, "I Feel Snitty," is available at Amazon Music!

My podcast, "I Feel Snitty," can now be heard on Amazon Music/Audible! You can check it out at this link: https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/a42809aa-5c21-4807-affc-0bda98741438/I-Feel-Snitty-with-Craig-Rozniecki

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun...

Face guarding is legal in college football and the NFL

I just wanted to remind fans and announcers especially, that face guarding is legal in both college football and the NFL. It all comes down to contact. So long as a defender doesn't make contact with an intended receiver, he doesn't have to turn around to play the ball. I can't tell you how many times every week I hear announcers talk about face guarding being a penalty. It's not. I even heard one announcer yesterday state, "If the defender doesn't turn around and play the ball, the ref will call pass interference every time." That's simply not true. Courtesy of referee Bill LeMonnier, he says this with regard to the rule at the college level (answered on 8/12/13): "NCAA rules on pass interference require the face guarding to have contact to be a foul. No contact, no foul by NCAA rules." In the NFL rule book, this is written: "Actions that constitute defensive pass interference include but are not limited to: (a) Contact by a ...

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