Skip to main content

Defending the mustache

My girlfriend and I got into a discussion about this a couple weeks ago. It's something I've wondered about for some time. While I've never sported just a mustache myself, I did go the way of the goatee several years ago for a little while. I honestly don't have strong feelings one way or the other. Whatever one wants to do in terms of facial hair is their call. But, what is it with this alleged link between mustaches and perverts/pedophiles/molesters? I've heard or read about it on a number of occasions - someone saying that another looks like a pervert/pedophile/molester. I ask why and they respond with, "Did you see that guy's mustache?" Yeah... So...?

Wasn't there a time when mustaches were seen as cool, even sexy? Clark Gable and Burt Reynolds of yesteryear? Johnny Depp more recently? So, what happened?

Now, as unfair as it is, I have a hard time seeing anyone successfully pulling off the Hitler mustache again. Michael Jordan gave it a whirl in a Hanes commercial and not even that guy could do it. Sorry, Michael. But, what about mustaches in general? Does a majority of people hold such silly, probably inaccurate negative connotations between a physical trait or attribute and a personality defect? ...such as the following?

Mustache - pervert

Beard - lazy

Goatee - indecisive

Long hair - stoner

Buzz-cut - Sinead O'Conner wannabe

Sideburns - 44 going on 45 and pretending to be going on 24

Tattoos - a person weening himself/herself off a heroin addiction

Piercings - nymphomaniac (obsessed with holes)

Bushy eyebrows - applying for a job at 60 Minutes



Big feet - big shoes

Yeah, some of those may be funny and the last of the ten is likely accurate (unless the person is a masochist), but does that make the other nine in any way accurate? No, not really. Just because one lazy person sports a beard doesn't mean that all beard-sporting gentlemen (or women) are lazy. Just because one pervert has a mustache doesn't mean mustache-sporting males (or females) should be seen as perverts. If so, I'd suggest the following actors get together to make a movie all sporting mustaches they've displayed in previous films: Brad Pitt, Tom Selleck, Eddie Murphy, Johnny Depp, Burt Reynolds, Ryan Gosling, Daniel Day-Lewis, Will Ferrell, James Franco, and George Clooney. The film could be a comedy, entitled, Bringing Back the Stache or Guys Gone Wild: Mustache Edition. Yeah, be getting to work on that. You're welcome, Hollywood.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun...

Mentioned on Crooks and Liars and Hinterland Gazette!

Due to some tweets of mine, I got mentioned on the following two sites (all my tweets can be viewed here -  https://twitter.com/CraigRozniecki ): https://crooksandliars.com/2019/04/trump-gives-stupid-advice-george https://hinterlandgazette.com/2019/03/istandwithschiff-is-trending-after-donald-trump-led-gop-attack-on-adam-schiff-backfires-spectacularly.html

Face guarding is legal in college football and the NFL

I just wanted to remind fans and announcers especially, that face guarding is legal in both college football and the NFL. It all comes down to contact. So long as a defender doesn't make contact with an intended receiver, he doesn't have to turn around to play the ball. I can't tell you how many times every week I hear announcers talk about face guarding being a penalty. It's not. I even heard one announcer yesterday state, "If the defender doesn't turn around and play the ball, the ref will call pass interference every time." That's simply not true. Courtesy of referee Bill LeMonnier, he says this with regard to the rule at the college level (answered on 8/12/13): "NCAA rules on pass interference require the face guarding to have contact to be a foul. No contact, no foul by NCAA rules." In the NFL rule book, this is written:  "Actions that constitute defensive pass interference include but are not limited to: (a) Contact by a ...