Senator James Inhofe illustrates stupid pride (pride in being stupid)

Republican Oklahoma Senator James Inhofe has long been a global-warming denier, going as far as to say it's "the greatest hoax ever perpetrated on the American people."

Back in February of 2010, when this nation's capital fell victim to record snowfall, Senator Inhofe built an igloo outside the Capitol with his kids, where he planted a sign that read, "Al Gore's Home. Honk If You Like Global Warming." Yes, he did this in the middle of winter following a massive snowstorm. I never said the guy was bright. While he's at it, he should hold up a sign during the summer when record highs are recorded, which reads, "Ice Age? What Ice Age? There Was No Fricking Ice Age!"

Inhofe is now front and center once again with regard to the global-warming debate (debate among conspiracists anyway), as he's one of the central targets of a new climate-change documentary entitled, "Greedy Lying B*stards."

After hearing this bit of news, Inhofe responded with, "I was not surprised to see myself front and center on the promotional material for this climate change movie, and quite frankly, I'm proud of it."

In light of this story, I envision the following scenario years ago when Inhofe was just a child:

James Inhofe: ::gets off the school bus (the shortest bus imaginable) and runs in the house and over to his mother:: "Mom, guess what?"

James' mother: "What, honey?"

James: "Look!" ::hands his math test score to her, wearing a big smile on his face as he does so::

Mother: "Wow...would you look at that? Wait... Is that right? You got a, what is that? I need my glasses... Is that a 10% or 100%?"

James: "10%! Aren't you proud, mom?"

Mother: "Uh, yeah... Of course, sweetie..."

James: "Me too! I was the only one in the class that got this grade! Aren't I special?"

Mother: "Yes, I'm beginning to think you are. I may need to talk to your father about that..."

James: "Thanks, mom! I'm going to go celebrate by counting to 10 - the number of my test score! 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6..."

Mother: "What comes after 6?"

James: "9?"

Mother: "Oh, lord... No, honey. 7 comes after 6, remember?"

James: "Oh... Okay!"

Mother: "You better work on that before you start applying to colleges in the next few months."

James: "Okay, mom! 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 9, 10! Woo-hoo! Go me! I am the greatest!"

Mother: "You forgot..."

James: "I forgot what, mom?"

Mother: "Oh, nothing. Good job. I better go talk to your father. Why don't you count to 10 again, but let's include the 8 this time."

James: "I ate something? I didn't eat anything, mom. It's not dinner yet. You're funny, mom."

Mother: "Yes, you are too. Oh, God, help me..."

James: "Help you what, mom?"

Mother: "Oh nothing... Amen."

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/03/29/james-inhofe-climate-change-documentary_n_2980947.html

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/07/23/inhofe-still-insists-were_n_657722.html

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun

The difference between "looking" and "checking out"

I may be way off with these numbers, but it's my approximation that at least 75% of individuals whom are involved in a serious relationship feel it's perfectly acceptable to "check out" members of the opposite sex they're not involved with. Meanwhile, approximately 25% either don't feel this is acceptable or aren't sure about the matter. I hadn't thought about this matter for a while, but since I've been dating a woman for about 8 months, the topic has been pondered about some. When reading or hearing others discuss this very issue, I often times hear comments similar to the following: "It's human nature to look." "There's nothing wrong with checking others out. I'm sure he/she does it too!" "It's fine to do it. Just don't tell your boyfriend/girlfriend about it or do it in front of them!" "It's natural to find people attractive." When observing the array of comments, I i

The verdict is in. To no one's surprise, Jonathan Hoenig has been found guilty of being an idiot.

Just recently, when discussing the Michael Brown shooting and whether or not race had anything to do with it, Fox News contributor Jonathan Hoenig said, "You know who talks about race? Racists." One moment while I provide Mr. Hoenig with the well deserved slow-clap. :: slow-claps for two seconds :: So, that was quite the line by Mr. Hoenig, wasn't it? "You know who talks about race? Racists." Well, wasn't he just talking about race? So, by his own words, I guess that makes him a racist. Also, if he wants to be consistent, does this mean that people whom talk about gender are sexists and people whom talk about sexual orientation are homophobes? With that line of thinking, Hoenig would engage in the following back-and-forths: Hoenig: "So, who are you voting for?" A woman: "The Democratic candidate, because he's been adamant about his support for equal rights for women." Hoenig: "You sexist feminist nazi!"

The Kind-Hearted Smart Aleck

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