The Top Ten Things Donald Trump's Ex-Wives Have Found Themselves Thinking During His Campaign
10. "For as many times as he kicked me out, I wonder if he thought I was one of 'the blacks'!"
9. "I wonder if he'll deport wife #3..."
8. "Ah, yes, that's why I left him. ...and that. As well as that... ...and that too..."
7. "Not even five seconds into his speech and I can already tell he forgot to take his pills today!"
6. "This reminds me of the time I asked him if he took the trash out and he started talking about banging his daughter, before going on tangents regarding: Guinness Book of World Records concerning rubberbands, going to a shooting range with a squirt gun, 101 reasons why the word 'awesome' only applies to him, and potential life on Uranus."
5. "The man seeks attention more than my friend's dog, Needy!"
4. "I don't know what he's been smoking, but those 'hands' of his are anything but yuuuuge!"
3. "To this day, I can't believe he placed a dead squirrel on his head. Stupid drunken foosball bets!"
2. "Every Halloween, kids probably knock on the door and ask him the same friggin' question: 'Are you supposed to be a giant pumpkin?' Yup..."
1. (drum roll) "Build a big beautiful wall? Seriously? He couldn't even build our kid a Lego castle! There were only two pieces! ...and instructions!"
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