Skip to main content

The next "hangry" could be...

I've found that the term hangry is appearing more regularly in everyday conversation. For the two of you unfamiliar with the word, it means to become so hungry one becomes angry (yes, a hybrid of angry and hungry). Given the ever growing popularity of hangry, I thought I'd try to get the ball rolling with a few other like terms. For each, I'll provide the definition and a sentence where the words could be used. Here we go...

Bangry: To become angry over a decision made on the reality show, The Bachelor.

Example: "Why in the sam hill did Jake not pick Delilah Doodymix? What the hell, Jake? What is wrong with you?!? I'm so f**kin' bangry right now! Ugh!"


Bork: To become bored while at work.

Example: "Hey, what are you up to? Me? I'm in the office, listening to 'Free Bird,' playing some FreeCell. I'm just so frickin' bork right now, you know? Oh, I gotta go. This hot new assistant just came in and will hopefully unbork me."


Dickelback: Immediate depression when Nickelback comes on the radio.

Example: "It sucks that song had to end. I could listen to 'Barbie Girl' all day every day. It's just so much fun! Wait, what's this? Please no... Yeah, yeah, you really wanna be a rock star. Meanwhile, you've given me a serious case of Dickelback.  Thanks a lot. Where'd I put my happy pills again?"


Drunkident: When one feels overly confident while drunk.

Example: "See that chick next to the bodybuilder-looking dude? I'm so gonna hit that tonight. It's gonna happen. You don't believe? Well, hell, let's get this party started right now. I gotta tell you, I've never been this drunkident before. I'm gonna stumble up to that woman and smoothly slur, 'The Who may have been talkin' 'bout their generation, but with you I wanna talk about penetration.' Yeah, that line works all of the time none of the time, so I'm good to go!"


E-Hornamy: Being horny to the point of creating a profile on E-Harmony.

Example: "I haven't gotten laid in so long. It's gotten to the point where, you know what I'm thinking about doing? I never thought I'd do this. I mean, I've tried the bar scene, restaurants, grocery stores, bowling alleys, Walmart at two in the morning on Saturdays, and nothin'. So, yeah, it's gotten to the point where I'm going full on E-Hornamy. You know, for where my mind's at right now, I'm thinking E-Hornamy may want to change that slogan of theirs from 'Love is closer than you think' to 'Herpes is closer than you think'."


Frihuahua: To fear chihuahuas more than anything else.

Example: "Hey doc, give me something! I've never felt so panicked before! This is the worst case of frihuahua I've ever had! You should have seen this thing! It was at least 5 inches tall, 3 lbs. - so much bigger than my neighbor's scary dog, Little Sh*t!"


Hesisome: Feeling hesitant about a threesome.

Example: "Honey, who'd you say was coming over tonight? Your ex-fiancé, Babbio, the model? Oh gosh, I don't know about this whole deal, babe. I'm really hesisome right now. I mean, what if Babbio gets possessive and pushes me off you with that scarily muscular right pinky of his? What if he gets weird and wants to have a sword fight with me? What if he wins, steroids and all? Let's just call things off with him and go with the safer Plan B option, Charlie Sheen."


Hungroitus: To become hungry after coitus.

Example: "Oh, that was so great, baby. You enjoy that cigarette while I go down to the kitchen to get some food. Are you hungroitus too? I'll get you something if you want. Hey, it's like Sheldon Cooper always said, 'There can be no coitus without hungroitus,' or something like that. He didn't? I swear he did. Well, anyway, I'll go grab some food and then when I come back upstairs, we can Google, 'Coitus with Sheldon Cooper' and see what comes up."


Freemanxiety: The anxiety one feels while listening to Morgan Freeman speak.

Example: "Where did I put my pills? I need some Zoloft! Freemanxiety is not messing around this time! That voice is just so deep, smooth, and calm, it makes me seriously question my sexuality! Crap, I can't find my pills! Maybe I'll just close my eyes, raise my fists, start imitating George's dad from Seinfeld, and see if that works. Freemanxiety now! Freemanxiety now!"


Mini golfous: Feeling joyous at the thought of miniature golf.

Example: "Good morning, sweetie. How did you sleep? I slept great! Why am I so happy? I'm not just happy; I'm mini golfous! I dreamt I was on the 18th green at that place down the road, Four Play and Putt, and got the ball through the windmill, the two dinosaurs, and the Chris Christie mafia statues for a hole-in-one! It was awesome!"

We'll see if any of those terms catch on like Hangry did...

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun...

Trump's Lie Tally at the CNN Debate

1) "We had the greatest economy in the history of our country. We had never done so well. Every – everybody was amazed by it. Other countries were copying us." 2) "But the thing we never got the credit for, and we should have, is getting us out of that COVID mess." 3) "The only jobs he created are for illegal immigrants and bounceback jobs; they’re bounced back from the COVID." 4) "Not going to drive them higher. It’s just going to cause countries that have been ripping us off for years, like China and many others, in all fairness to China – it’s going to just force them to pay us a lot of money, reduce our deficit tremendously, and give us a lot of power for other things." (tariffs) 5) "He also said he inherited 9 percent inflation." 6) "No, he inherited almost no inflation and it stayed that way for 14 months. And then it blew up under his leadership, because they spent money like a bunch of people that didn’t know what t...