Much has been made about Nebraska head football coach Bo Pelini's recently reported tirade where he uttered the f-bomb more within one minute than actors in a Quentin Tarantino film called Saying F**k A Lot. Given that, here is what I imagine Mr. Pelini would say in the following situations:
Situation: Ordering a pizza
Pelini: "Yeah, I'd like a f**king delivery, please."
Situation: Getting pulled over by a cop
Cop: "Have you been drinking tonight, sir?"
Pelini: "F**k no!"
Situation: Parent-teacher conference
Pelini: "So, I see my kid has a f**kin' 'C' - is that right?"
Situation: On his kids' birthdays
Pelini: "Happy f**kin' birthday, sweetie."
Situation: At the end of a prayer at church
Pelini: "A-f**king-men"
Situation: Singing the National Anthem prior to a game
Pelini: "...Some f**kin' bombs in the air..."
Situation: Just prior to eating Thanksgiving dinner with the family
Pelini: "Who wants to say f**king grace?"
Situation: Wedding vows
Pelini: "I f**king do!"
Situation: Going to a movie with his wife
Pelini: "Yeah, two for f**kin' Rambo please."
Situation: Going to sleep with his wife
Wife: "I love you."
Pelini: "I f**king love you too! Mwah!"
Situation: Ordering a pizza
Pelini: "Yeah, I'd like a f**king delivery, please."
Situation: Getting pulled over by a cop
Cop: "Have you been drinking tonight, sir?"
Pelini: "F**k no!"
Situation: Parent-teacher conference
Pelini: "So, I see my kid has a f**kin' 'C' - is that right?"
Situation: On his kids' birthdays
Pelini: "Happy f**kin' birthday, sweetie."
Situation: At the end of a prayer at church
Pelini: "A-f**king-men"
Situation: Singing the National Anthem prior to a game
Pelini: "...Some f**kin' bombs in the air..."
Situation: Just prior to eating Thanksgiving dinner with the family
Pelini: "Who wants to say f**king grace?"
Situation: Wedding vows
Pelini: "I f**king do!"
Situation: Going to a movie with his wife
Pelini: "Yeah, two for f**kin' Rambo please."
Situation: Going to sleep with his wife
Wife: "I love you."
Pelini: "I f**king love you too! Mwah!"
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