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“It’s All Mental!”

Is it all in our head? A buzz after one drinks alcohol? Love? Misery? Seizures? Highs? Depression? Is everything controllable? What is possible and not possible is dependent upon our thoughts and beliefs? If one believes they can beat depression, can they automatically flip the negative thoughts to positive ones and go from misery to joy? If one battles seizures, can they beat and overcome the seizures through outwitting them? Is everything a choice? Can we ultimately decide everything that will or won't occur in our lifetimes and how these events will affect us?

Some would like to believe this. I wish I could believe it. But there are some things in life that we cannot help. I didn't have a choice as to what gender I'd be, whom my parents would be, what language I'd be born into, where I'd be born, what skin color I'd have, what orientation I'd be, what religion I'd be born into, what political leanings I'd be surrounded by, what health issues I'd be born with, amongst many other things. That's what I was born with and born into. I had no choice in the matter.

As we grow, the ability to make decisions for ourselves expand, but the permission to make decisions for ourselves is rarely ever at a maximum. We're either working under someone or compromises come a-calling when we're dating, married to or living with a person.

What about thoughts, feelings and sensations as we grow? Are they all choice? Can we numb or block out the pain of an ankle sprain if we so choose? If we choose to drive on a given night, can we block out a buzz from drinking alcohol if we wish? Is happiness or sadness all a choice?

Attitude can play a major factor in how one feels on a daily basis. If one holds their head high and carries with them an optimistic attitude about everyday life, that will definitely play a role in their overall level of happiness. However, there are genetic and environmental factors we can't ignore. Almost everything has some link (from minimal to extreme) when it comes to heredity. Alcoholism and depression are no different. If there's a history of alcoholism or depression in a family, while this by no means guarantees that a new-born will grow up to be a depressed alcoholic, it does increase the likelihood of them developing some form of depression or having troubles with alcohol. Environment also plays a role. If a family is non-communicative and seemingly depressed, the child will most likely suffer negative consequences. If a child is born during the mass genocide in Sudan, the war in Ira, or the Holocaust, what he or she was born into and surrounded by will definitely affect the child.

I wish life was so simple. I wish everything we thought, believed, felt and experienced was based on choice. But it's not that simple. It's complex. There are some choices we can freely make for ourselves. There are others we need guidance with. There are yet others that are unfortunately beyond our control.

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