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Romneyography 101

During the final presidential debate, Republican nominee Mitt Romney made quite the gaffe, making some wonder if he had ever looked at a globe or even knew what one was.

During the debate, Romney said with regard to Syria and Iran's relationship, "Syria is Iran's only ally in the Arab world. It's their route to the sea."

I'll give you a moment to look at a map or globe. Take your time. I'll play a short tune while you look. If Mitt Romney is reading this, I'll place "Stairway to Heaven" on repeat for a while. Okay, everyone not named Mitt Romney, have you found it? Good. Moving on...

No, I'm not sure what Mitt Romney was talking about either. First off, there are two countries between Iran and Syria - those being Iraq and Turkey.

Secondly, as Glenn Kessler - fact-checker at The Washington Post wrote, "...Iran has about 1,500 miles of coastline along the Persian Gulf and Gulf of Oman, leading to the Arabian Sea."

The only way Syria could be considered Iran's "route to the sea" is if... or if... Alright, so there is no possible way. I tried, Mitt. I tried.

So, given Romney's expertise on Middle East geography, I have a hunch he'd illustrate similar expertise with the rest of the world's geography. It's now my belief that Romney will one day (perhaps not too long from now) will say the following:

- "Alaska is at the center-point of this great country - the United States of America."

- "Have you ever noticed that Iceland is bigger than Russia?"

- "I've always wondered why this was. Why is it that Brazil is in South America, which is to the north of us - North America? That never made any sense to me."

- "The earth isn't round. It's a two-dimensional pyramid. I've traveled to the end of the earth, but stopped and turned around, because I knew I'd fall if I didn't."

- "I think it's really neat how Mexico and Australia are neighbors. The only thing I don't like is how much longer it takes to fly to Australia than Mexico."

- "This city is really quite lovely. There's nothing like San Francisco, Florida in the summertime. That Golden Gate Bridge is something else."

- "Canada has always been China's route to the ocean!"

- "It can't be any coincidence that the country of 'Grease' is right next to the countries of Turkey and Bacon."

- "It's amazing that India and Indiana are only two letters apart, yet several states away from each other."

- "I love how the names of so many African countries remind me of names I hear every day right here in America: Chad, Keithiopia, South Africa, and many others."

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/iran-blog/2012/oct/23/romney-gaffe-syria-iran-route-to-sea

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/election-2012/wp/2012/10/22/fact-check-irans-route-to-the-sea/

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