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Bo Pelini's Greatest F**king Hits

Much has been made about Nebraska head football coach Bo Pelini's recently reported tirade where he uttered the f-bomb more within one minute than actors in a Quentin Tarantino film called  Saying F**k A Lot . Given that, here is what I imagine Mr. Pelini would say in the following situations: Situation: Ordering a pizza Pelini: "Yeah, I'd like a f**king delivery, please." Situation: Getting pulled over by a cop Cop: "Have you been drinking tonight, sir?" Pelini: "F**k no!" Situation: Parent-teacher conference Pelini: "So, I see my kid has a f**kin' 'C' - is that right?" Situation: On his kids' birthdays Pelini: "Happy f**kin' birthday, sweetie." Situation: At the end of a prayer at church Pelini: "A-f**king-men" Situation: Singing the National Anthem prior to a game Pelini: "...Some f**kin' bombs in the air..." Situation: Just prior to eating Thanksgi...

Die-hard fans make me laugh sometimes

In response to Nebraska head coach Bo Pelini's tirade directed at a local columnist as well as Huskers fans, I've read many Huskers fans defending Bo, saying, "We're with you, Bo!" Here's how this strange make-believe conversation between the two parties plays out in my mind: Pelini: "F**k you guys! F**k all of you! F**k the fans! F**k every single one of you!" Nebraska fan: "Exactly! F**k us! We love you, Bo!" Pelini: "F**k you!" Nebraska fan: "I love you!" Pelini: "Did you not f**king hear me, dipsh*t? I said f**k you!" Nebraska fan: "I know! I love you!" Pelini: "What the f**k? I'm getting the f**k out of here! You people are f**kin' crazy! F**k!" Nebraska fan: "Don't leave! I love you!" Hmm... Perhaps some die-hard fans are masochists.