The Kind-Hearted Smart Aleck

Over the past week, I've had some fun with the following trending hashtags on Twitter: #MemoDay, #Rosenstein, #SeanHannitysTwitter, #AlienComfortFoods, and #CandyCrush. Here are my posts, ordered from the most popular to the least popular (all my tweets can be seen here - https://twitter.com/CraigRozniecki ): 1) Trump: "This memo is all about transparency. I'm Mr. Transparent, believe me. But no, you can't see my tax returns or Don Jr.'s Trump Tower emails. Hey, have we sent the hush money to that porn star yet? So transparent." #MemoDay #Snark 548 Likes, 233 Retweets 2) If Donald Trump wants to talk about loyalty pledges, he should start with himself being loyal to his country (not Russia). #Rosenstein 130 Likes, 63 Retweets 3) BREAKING NEWS: "Sean Hannity deactivates account to create a secret Twitter society" #SeanHannitysTwitter #Snark 119 Likes, 43 Retweets 4) The FBI interviews Carter Page: 2013 Steele dossier: 2016 GOP: "W...

At a town hall in Cincinnati, Ohio today, Republican vice presidential candidate and front-runner to star as the lead in a "Forrest Gump" remake due to his being able to run across the country in record-breaking time while hardly breaking a sweat - Paul Ryan - said, "The things you talk about like traditional marriage and family and entrepreneurship. These aren't values that are indicative to any one person or creed or color. These are American values, these are universal human values." Yes, I guess it can now be made official that I and many others whom believe in gays' marriage rights are actually aliens sent by the president of a yet discovered planet by the name of Analove (pronounced anna - lohv, of course), where we are all gay. Our planet song is "Macho Man" by the Village People. Our planet movie is "Brokeback Mountain." On our Independence Day, for 24 hours, we just do it up the wazoo. "Universal human values?" Real...