The Kind-Hearted Smart Aleck

How can you save your marriage? By being more honest? Working harder? Seeing a counselor? Listening better? Not according to social scientist, Catherine Hakim. In her new book, entitled, "The New Rules: Internet Dating, Playfairs and Erotic Power," Hakim lays claim that a marriage can be saved by having an affair. That's right, husbands and wives, go out and cheat on your spouse! Woo-hoo! As Rodney Dangerfield said in Caddyshack , "Everyone's gonna get laid!" Hakim writes the following in her book, comparing sex to dining: "The fact that we eat most meals at home with spouses and partners does not preclude eating out in restaurants to sample different cuisines and ambiences, with friends or colleagues. Anyone rejecting a fresh approach to marriage and adultery, with a new set of rules to go with it, fails to recognize the benefits of a revitalised sex life outside the home." She also stated that the first rule of having an affair is to "...

I'm sure most people after a certain age have been through at least one occasion with a friend when they're stuck in not knowing what to do or say to them. It's a difficult situation to be in sometimes. What does a "real" friend do? Does a "real" friend always stand by and support their friend's decision, regardless if they agree with it or not? Does a "real" friend make his or her voice known if they don't agree with said friend's decision? Is it possible to find a middle ground between those two options? It's so difficult, because I don't think there's really a singular right way to go about it. In the end, it's the other person making the decision. We, as friends, can say as much as we'd like and may very well wind up influencing a friend's final decision, yet in the end, they're the ones with the ultimate say. So is it really worth potentially damaging or losing a friendship by making your voice kno...

I'm usually not one to utter tired cliches and other phrases, however, I feel some need the reminder that actions do actually speak louder than words. Recently, a woman told me she was looking for friends, but as the days progressed, her actions told another story. So, what's a guy supposed to believe? A few words uttered at the start of a relationship (of any kind) or the actions proceeding those very words? If he attempts to make sense of the two in conjunction with one another, that will be next to impossible. So, which way does he go? She truly meant she only wants to be friends or she want something greater? If a husband tells his wife that he loves her, yet consistently abuses her, what does that say? Does he really love his wife, just because he said it? No, of course not. Any man whom stoops to the level of abusing his wife in any manner cannot genuinely love his wife. Actions speak louder than words. If a politician promises to not raise taxes and does so, does t...

A friend of mine got into a discussion about this very thing a while back. We agreed for the most part what "cheating" was, but she brought up a good point, that many have their different rules of what "cheating" is. That's true. I've heard of some couples who think so long as the other doesn't engage in sex with another, then they're not cheating. Some have some silly rules about if they're in different zip codes, then it's not cheating. Some go off the deep end and consider lying to be cheating or is that the deep end at all? As usual, I will go to the helpful dictionary for some answers. How does it define cheating? 1. To deceive. 2. To mislead; fool. 3. To act dishonestly. 4. To be sexually unfaithful. These are all pretty vague, except for the last definition. Alright, so I think most people can agree that engaging in sexual activities with someone other than their boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife is cheating. But, then a...

Many television programs make me laugh out of their sheer stupidity, but nothing makes me laugh harder than soap operas. Whenever I have time during an afternoon, I make sure to watch one of these shows and laugh hysterically in the process. Words that immediately come to mind when I think of a soap opera are: Overacted, over-dramatized, makeup, lying, cheating and love circle.  The love, or lust circle that takes place in these shows reminds me of middle school. Guy A will date Girl A for a week before breaking up with her and immediately dating Girl B (Girl A’s best friend, of course) for a couple days and then go back to dating Girl A. Girl A went out with Guy B (Guy A’s best friend) for the two days she and Guy A were broken up. Guy B and Girl B then start dating. This cycle continues for the next year or so. I find it even more humorous to watch adults go through a similar cycle.  A soap opera’s music is very distinctive as well. Along with pornos (so I’ve heard… Th...