The Kind-Hearted Smart Aleck

I wrote a theory about this a while back in the blog entitled "Nice Guys vs. Bad Boys". I said then that it seemed to me women perhaps liked having the challenge of shaping up the bad boy and if (and when) things went wrong, she'd have the nice guy with whom to talk. This way, she gets to keep both the boyfriend and the friend. If she went about it the other way and dated the nice guy, do you really think the bad boy would play the role of nice guy and listen to her vent? Although, what would she have to vent about? Vent about not having anything to vent about? Do people really do that? I wrote that theory from careful observation, good listening and of course, first-hand experience. I bumped into another situation like this a while ago. A person I know has a history of dating guys who are jerks, to be nice (no pun intended). So, a guy whom she claimed was "very nice" and "very easy to talk to" asked if they could go out sometime and she declined and...

A friend of mine and I recently discussed what kind of baggage comes along with being a nice person. Why is that? Why must we carry that baggage? Is it because we actually listen to people? Give good advice? Actually seem to care? Those probably all play roles, but why is it that we seem to have a magnetic force, affecting all those around us whom have major issues or problems? Their eyes spot ours and immediately know they can come talk to us. There's never that person we're attracted to on every level whom immediately spots us and walks over to engage in conversation. No. It's those people who need a counselor, a psychologist, a best friend. So, there we are, listening, nodding, giving them eye contact, telling them what we think about their problem(s) and through this, they may get the wrong impression and think we're interested, when we're only being nice. To them, we're perfect. That's just fantastic, isn't it? We're perfect to people with more ...